You also live alone, sleeping on the couch next to the bus and don’t understand why you need a couch?

She: O holy prostate!
He: E... either there is ignorance of grammar and punctuation, or the birth of a new religious cult!

by M89:
Do you sometimes save the world from a nuclear bomb by turning off the microwave for a second before it starts feeding?

Goodly communicated in one of the hospitals of Yekaterinburg:
"Deliver feces and urine in containers, show respect for yourself and the doctor"

he is (08:12) :
What are you doing now?
She (08:12) :
Coffee please
he is (08:12) :
And about what?

Sitting with a friend, drinking beer, word-for-word, it was about his new projector...
It became interesting, and whether it was possible to project the image from the height of the 6th floor on a transformator booth standing in the yard.
I have not seen such a circus for a long time: children with open eyes, baptized grandmothers, enthusiastic teens...

According to the most modest calculations, the diagonal of the screen was about 2500 inches, and for the test video a friend chose tough porn.

Happy Birthday, dear Google! For 11 years, you have been hinting at us that Putin is a crab and advising us what to do to let go!
Ura to!

We are sitting over a virus that tries to get stuck on the unix server by picking up a password for the Administrator account. Poor, I’m sorry for him, he reminds me of a sperm in his ass.

I wanted a serious long-term relationship. The teenager. has passed.

When we care about the future, we make our past.

It was in the distant eighties... I began to serve in the north of the Army Air Force, i.e. our helicopter squadron was assigned to the motor rifle division for combat support. And here the division took some exercises with the landing of reconnaissance in some remote area. The landing was carried out by a helicopter of our part. The commander of the squadron was present at the preliminary meeting with the commander of the division and on the question of what is needed to ensure the landing, he said that it was necessary to clean up the snow flat ground (the case was in winter) in the size of 50x50m and that somewhere from the edge stood a column with some flag or cloth (to visually determine the directions and the approximate force of the wind). The commander of the motor gun unit who was present at the meeting recorded everything in good faith and said that everything will be done in the best way possible.
The exercises began, we look forward to the return of the helicopter after completing the task of landing, finally he arrives and the pilot of the mother and at the same time laughing, he tells the following: with the landing he flies to the perfectly cleared from the snow site and sees - exactly in the middle a pillar is digged, a brightly painted flagship is attached to him... Apparently, the principle of the corrupt phone worked: the commander of the unit put the task to the combat, the rotting, and when the team reached the squadron, he understood everything in his own way.

He was so polite that it seemed like he was about to fuck.

to this:

Loneliness is when you sit alone at home on Friday and Saturday, drink beer and read the poor.

____________________________________________________________

One hundred plus one hundred!!!! to

I talk to a girl in bed. It is complex about its appearance.

D: I have thick legs, my eyelids are short, my hair is liquid.
I: Don't be afraid, sweet, soon, literally in 3 years, this will not be appreciated.
Q: What will be appreciated?
Food and ammunition, of course.

What a joke for the girls:
We agreed to call one on the internet and meet. They write to me, like I’m never the first to call, so here’s my number 89. I will call in 10 minutes. I am calling, no one is calling.
Three weeks later I see her again in the tyrant, asking what a joke, so she answers me: "A-a-a. It was you who called me! I don’t pick up the phone if the number is unknown.and "
The curtain!

A group of boys and girls listened to the conversation:

Do you know where this scarring on your hand comes from? I signed one under a pitch.
WOW, and how is it?
He said I would not cut the veins.

I go and think: one pitchball, the other - dubaeb Q_Q

On Wednesday, Vladimir Putin visited a new nursery in Abkhazia, where twins were born a few minutes before the arrival of the prime minister. They called them, of course, Volodya and Dima. Even though they were girls.

>I moved to live in Ukraine. obtained a citizenship.
Previously I was alone and my name was Michael. And now we are two and we have Hailo.

xxx: I come therefore I go to her home, she puts a plate in front of me with some balance from a caterpillar and says - you decide to eat this - I decide to sleep with you
O_O

Often confuse our house of bodies with the store.They forgot.The next call:you sell pork?The husband is dissatisfied.The pork is not today.They do not calm down:And what is it?The husband cries loudly:
The human!!They shouted and threw the phone.