bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 67 - ] Comment quote №53783
 23.09.2011
Electrical Safety Exam: What is resuscitation? Answer option: "Complex of measures to revive the deceased"... I see a brigade of electricians-nechromants

[ + 62 - ] Comment quote №53782
 23.09.2011
"That’s a great deal of money!!! Smyth shrugged his head sadly. The five signs. A true sign of an absolutely faint mind. – Terry Pratchett, The Dark Knight.

[ + 121 - ] Comment quote №53781
 23.09.2011
Do you remember Silent Hill?
Yyy: Well yes, approximately
xxx: there was a siren, and the dead town was immediately filled with monsters, sprinkling from all the gaps.
YYY: Yes, it was like that.
XXX is shorter
XXX: Absolutely also in school

[ + 61 - ] Comment quote №53780
 23.09.2011
A friend went on an expedition to the north. He posted pictures of how he worked there. On one friend dumb dig a hole. The deep. The first stone:

"There have been accidents?"

[ + 43 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №53779
 23.09.2011
The grass is green, the sun is shining, and you have already fucked hard to write with such-what-books every song that is incomprehensible without any signs of interruption when you read or breathe or turn blatant.

[ + 66 - ] Comment quote №53778
 23.09.2011
xxx: The buttons "Read", "Look" and "Listen" will appear on Facebook.
Yyy: It would be enough of one - "Boyan".

[ + 66 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №53777
 22.09.2011
A small comment :)

Stop chasing on "vanillec", you’re becoming like a grandmother on the sidewalk! <...>

Comrade, we are not becoming like grandparents... the time is passing, the children are growing up, we are getting older, we are becoming grandparents at the entrance...

[ + 77 - ] Comment quote №53776
 22.09.2011
HH: Here I am an idiot.
XHHH: I have been working under the windows of the DPS car all day. I went out to smoke and decided to ask our brave if it is necessary to change the checklist if the owner changed.
XHH: They answer that it is necessary. I say thank you and I leave.
After work, I roll out on my cage from the courtyard, and these same haishniks look at me and smile.
Guess what happened next :(

[ + 103 - ] Comment quote №53775
 22.09.2011
In Sevastopol he was riding on a board waiting for the train.
People look at me, most of them.
I think it’s a shit, usually everyone’s off at all.
I ride
Then I thought, maybe she screams loudly at me, everyone is looking at me, and I am in the headphones and I can't hear the niqab.
I remove the headphone.
And there to the entire station of speakers.
Young man on the ski, how many times do you repeat, stop riding the station!!!!!!! to

[ + 75 - ] Comment quote №53774
 22.09.2011
XXX: not smoking at all.
Yyy: Oh, more money for beer remains))

[ + 64 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №53773
 22.09.2011
A friend told me, his girlfriend asks: Do you know what day is today?
What is the number today?
17th of September.
No, I don’t know what day.
Nine days ago we met. Will you give me something?
I don’t know what they usually give for nine days.

[ + 63 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №53772
 22.09.2011
[11:38:58] xxx: I went to them at the reception
[11:39:02] xxx: brought monoblock
xxx xxx xxx xxx xxx xxx xxx xxx xxx xxx xxx xxx
[11:39:07] xxx: broke up
[11:39:12] xxx: friended to his controller hell to scrap the account
[11:39:19] xxx: I sit, I adjust, and one such - and let me tie those hair.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
[11:39:27] xxx: I gry - yes
[11:39:35] xxx: lose me like Julia Tymoshenko
[11:39:39] xxx: with a stunt on the head

[ + 52 - ] Comment quote №53771
 22.09.2011
Clip of Leningrad - elections
Commentary
1st Elections, Elections, Unilaterals PIDORS!
2nd 199 Members of the United Russia party did not like this video.

[ + 53 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №53770
 22.09.2011
XXX: I have bad news.
XXX: the Gandons traveled
XXX: Where to go
xxx: I understand there for 3-5 rubles, but not for 30 the same
YYY: Tire has travelled
YYY: transition to winter

[ + 51 - ] Comment quote №53769
 22.09.2011
XXX: I was looking for a job in the recruitment agencies
xxx: Invited to work in the recruitment agency *CRAZY*

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №53768
 22.09.2011
We were sitting in a restaurant of Ukrainian cuisine (type Taras Bulba), and there all the wooden-country... And standing in the corner a huge wooden spoonful of more human growth – I saw this spoonful and loudly to the whole hall I say, “Here would I have such bread!”" And next to the spoonful stood a guard, whom I did not notice, – and it turned out that it sounded in his address...the guard was upset and left. I crushed everything and I was uncomfortable.

[ + 60 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №53767
 22.09.2011
[21:46:27] Sanya: I have hemoglobin low.
[21:46:52] Vasily Zalupin: Is it you yourself that decided?

So eat these bottles, the pharmacies are full.
[21:47:59] Sanya: Well how I have the temperature to persistently keep below 36 for a very long time, I bowed and asked my grandmother, well, like hemoglobin
[21:50:13] Vasily Zalupin: Sanek, if you go well, you can come to the conclusion that I have AIDS, Alzheimer’s disease, tropical hemangioma of Mavsisyan, that I am Elena Berkova, that I want to increase my penis, that I have an IQ like Einstein and that I was in my past life the favorite shoes of Uncle Adolf. Stop self-diagnosing and go to the doctor.

[ + 46 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №53766
 22.09.2011
by J:
How do you know I am gentle?

M is :
I represent

by J:
It’s all lies, I just go well and all.

M is :
o o.

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №53765
 22.09.2011
Conversations on the street:
See, the boy on the tournament is pulling up.
Well, yes, better let them pull up than smoking and drinking.
You smoke and drink yourself.
I’d rather smoke and drink than pull up.

[ + 80 - ] Comment quote №53764
 22.09.2011
See also Mirror's Edge. I forgot the name. Well, I decided in Google to find on request "game where the Asian girl jumps"
Oh guys, what I just didn’t find...

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna