bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №81825
 21.05.2013
The man who wrote:
Parents here are these "geniuses" and more...
And what do you not like a child who knows the word ‘masochist’? It is quite an intangible word for itself, and it is unlikely that the cops with the seeds and the Yaga know it.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №81824
 21.05.2013
by Habr

who.yandex is a great name for people search service.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №81823
 21.05.2013
by Katrin (Black's)
Sociological survey at the door of ZAGS:
- Tell me, young man, what makes you marry this girl?
She forces...
LAPRA
And my mom is going to say:'(

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №81822
 21.05.2013
I am looking for an employee in an online store. Girl, 18 years old, active, educated and educated.
Comment: Good luck in the search, I have never met a trainee.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №81821
 21.05.2013
Another example of female logic.

What an interesting series you are watching! And without me!
I: So I suggested you look together.
Why didn’t you convince me?

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №81820
 21.05.2013
The Game of Thrones:
xxx: By the way, judging by the headline of the fifth book, five more characters will appear.
YYY: well right
YYY: They are ending.

[ + 23 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №81819
 21.05.2013
Only Captain Evidence, Petrosian (as the author of jokes) and the full composition of the "Anshlag, Anshlag!"under the table of jokes about Sasha Gray, which was struck by Lada Kalina

[ + 51 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №81818
 21.05.2013
DrBerD: I saw here about the password for the laptop "seventy-five millimeters", which five employees could not correctly type. The joke was worse. Our Mongol went on a business trip, computer on the password. Needed to take the drawings in the electronics, we call - says that password - "password". The hour matured, and the transmission killed, and as soon as they did not write. "Parol", "Password", "Parolj"... In short, p*c. Then I reached his zen, and killed "Porol"... Bingo, fucking!

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №81817
 21.05.2013
I found in the questionnaire of the applicant. girl, buch.
Experience working with office equipment (fax, modem, printer, scanner)
and fashion!! You are accepted)

[ + 25 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №81816
 21.05.2013
[From the article on the meaning of the ring on a certain finger of the hand]:

"If the ring is worn on the middle finger (Finger of Saturn) - The ring resolution: "I am beautiful!".. The longest and most central, it best demonstrates the jewelry and how much we like ourselves. The aggressive superiority of the ring on the index finger is replaced by a more polite sense of self-worth and forgiving self-esteem. The larger and more noticeable the ring, the stronger its owner tries to convince others of its irresistibility.

Interestingly, it was on the middle finger that the legendary Ring of Almighty from Tolkien's trilogy was worn. The question is, by what gesture did Sauron greet the enemy's troops, if that finger with the ring was immediately cut off? ..."

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №81815
 21.05.2013
I go to work. In a row there are Cadillac Escalade with a young guy driving, and a blue downsan micra, with a healthy man. An analogy is immediately found - a boy has 5 cm, and the male is actually a black man with a half-meter hernia. The question is, who of them is more jealous of the loser, pressed by the crowd to the side window of a crowded bus?

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №81814
 21.05.2013
Answers to Sapphire:
xxx: What is "Topographic Cretinism"?
YYY: It’s when you leave the subway for 10 steps you turn around and immediately think, “Where am I?”and'

[ + 3 - ] Comment quote №81813
 21.05.2013
The case was in the distant 80s in the student community.
Room small, 2 double beds, a total of 4 seats.
We came with the boys and friends after the walk, all lay down in places, extinguished the lights.
XHH: I clearly used to stick to my own, and I typically go until everyone is asleep.
XHH: It’s been about an hour, I’ve been waiting, I say let’s go.
xxx: It is clear that no one slept and did not gather and begins such a sluggish engine.
xxx: you just imagine, two young people on the second shelf, thank God even beds on conscience then made)
In general, when everything went away after about half an hour (in complete silence, no one spoke a word), one twin didn't stand and gave a quiet "hi-hi"
XHH: Rusted so I thought the stomach would break and the neighbors of the neighboring block would come to crave what was going on...

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №81812
 21.05.2013
The plate was broken.
NNN: The chorus immediately ran away.

NNN: Probably wanted to eat me as I ate him for a t-shirt in the morning

[ + 33 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №81811
 21.05.2013
XXX: The Cultural Capital
and mm?
XXX: I go in the tram, the people - the battle. My grandmother and granddaughter are 5 years old. The grandmother begins to ring the cell phone with a loud monophonic melody. A woman with zero emotions. The granddaughter pulls her by the sleeve and cries: “Baby, your phone is ringing!” The grandmother answers: “I hear it” and continues to ignore the challenge. The dialog is repeated three times. People turn around, whisper, tick and shut their eyes. My stop, my grandmother and granddaughter follow me. I hear behind my back:
Why didn’t you pick up the phone?
- Because, Anetchka, in public places to talk on the phone is uncultural, you can bother someone. Who likes to listen to other people’s conversations?

[ + 35 - ] [5 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №81810
 21.05.2013
I would cure this man, virgins cannot use tampons.
===
As they can. Or did you think it was all closed?

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №81809
 21.05.2013
HHH: - Yes, Vovan was completely squeezed, why would no one drive it out of the way.
Yyy: - You do not touch Vovan, he is a wanderer and a tester from God.
Yyy: - I only remember working, I wrote a proga. They say to him come down, our best tester. I waited for a week and couldn’t stand it when he came. Look at it now, there was no time.
Yyy: – I didn’t have time to start – I put it. Speaks happily on another launch, launched the tick the tick lies, again launched the tick, the tick, the tick lies. Shortly I go to him. If not put in half an hour, the product will survive the war.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №81808
 21.05.2013
The socks are over.
Don’t cry because it’s over. Smile because it was.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №81807
 21.05.2013
It was built by ancient Tajiks. The Tajikite.

[ + 17 - ] Comment quote №81806
 21.05.2013
The Spring. The husband wants love, the son is an inflatable crocodile. I will probably buy a terrible inflatable woman at a discount. It is multifunctional,

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