bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 23 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №97333
 02.05.2014
Another pearl of patients. Wife of Doctor. He sits at a paid reception. An old woman, about 70 years old. My wife accepted. The old lady is about to go and put 500 rubles on the table. The wife says no, I need to get the receipt through the box. The old lady leaves, returns in 10 minutes, puts a receipt of payment and 500 rubles on top. Follow this dialogue:

Wife: No, I don’t need money. Only payment receipts are sufficient.

I am not just for treatment. You have previously treated my neighbor. So well treated... she died, we inherited. Here is gratitude.

by Zy. The neighbor was just an old woman and it had nothing to do with treatment.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №97332
 02.05.2014
zzz: Comrade xxxh has the largest number of quotes
Zzzz: not even a word about copyright infringement
Take an example, comrades!

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №97331
 02.05.2014
From Seminary
In Orlando, there are warning signs on the streets: Criminal activity prohibited.

It is strange that they did not write "completely prohibited".

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №97330
 02.05.2014
Prometheus gave people fire. He was tied to a rock.
Danko illuminated the way for the lost. He was destroyed.
Jesus brought salvation to the soul. He was crucified.
Lincoln liberated the slaves. He was shot.
I wanted to do something good for people.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №97329
 02.05.2014
Neighbors called their cat “Obama.” At first, I thought about the dark-banded fat. It turned out — for his unwavering conviction that he has the right to go wherever he thinks.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №97328
 02.05.2014
Comments on the "musty" discussion about the subway:

It was originally an ancient city mem:
If you see a person going up the ladder in the metro in St. Petersburg, it is a moscovite.

A similar joke about the mentality of our northern neighbors:
In Helsinki there was a wind power outage. Hundreds of Finns were stuck for several hours on the city’s escalators.

All good and positive :)

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №97327
 02.05.2014
here here :
A lot of prohibitions:
And why does the advertising of tampaks-pick-ups-middles from milk etc. not be marked with the 16+ sign??? Or show them after 23:00!! to

Because 'tampacks-plugging' starts in girls from 11-12 years, regardless of the "corruption". But why remedies for impotence with such a frequency to show - really, the question.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №97326
 02.05.2014
Every movie is overwhelmed, and people then get sick of reality.

[ + 38 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №97325
 02.05.2014
I had to repair the note on warranty, purchased in the e-shop. I call the TP and explain the situation. Ask for the order number. I say I do not remember. Looking for the phone number. I found the Asus laptop. ask to call back to the service center and name the order number (I was dictated). Talk to the SC Director. and salutations.
and salutations.
I want to buy for repair under guarantee.
Give us the order number.
I dictate.
At the other end of the cable I hear a confusion. The question on the phone.
What exactly does not work with the feet for the bath and the fasteners?

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №97324
 01.05.2014
Commentary on the photo (Georgia tape on a Mercedes):
It’s only been 70 years...the Germans learned to make a Mercedes, we learned to make a tape.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №97323
 01.05.2014
XXX: I have a bat. He teaches the dog to command "voice" in silent mode.
YYYYYYYYYYYY
xxx: and the dog before swallowing usually grabs air loudly with his fist once, such as speeding up before playing a sound. and daddy gives her a sausage immediately after the discharge, but before "gave" =)

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №97322
 01.05.2014
I’ve been told I’ll live 20 years, we’re walking, we’re walking.

Mary: I think I will die on September 29, 2017
Mary is on the way.
The doctors told me, who are you?

Annex to the CC

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №97321
 01.05.2014
On the subject of reservations:
Mom, telling about the heroine of the book - and she's there like a cabbage.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №97320
 01.05.2014
Lav: a Glory proposes to call the computer of the bucha a lazy

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №97319
 01.05.2014
Escape from the chicken! She cried Sissadin and jumped out of the bulwark :-)

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №97318
 01.05.2014
The Russian language.

I come somehow to school, which I have long since finished, I go to the teacher of literature.
And she told me the following story, literally a recent one (after her words):
We are now in ninth grade "Gone from Mad". And here I take a lesson and think: what would I ask them like this to put at least three - because the faces are not marked with the seal of wisdom! I invented it, I ask:
The kids! Why did Sophia prefer Silence to Chacki?
The children hung their heads side by side and thought. And suddenly on the first party, Vanetch, an angel such a curly, raises his hand:
I know!
Well tell me!
"Because Silchalin smooked Sophie in the face, and Chatzky did not think about it!
I pick up the floor of the jaw and I wonder:
Dear man, where did you get it?
In the text.
A quote, who can guess which one?
"And Moscow at the time".
I ask him:
What is "Moscow"?
And he answers me:
- And my mom so often says to me - "go to Moscow quietly, dirty".

Another pearl from the same pearl:
"A purple as it is written, through a defiant? That’s a big deal!"

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №97317
 01.05.2014
Tomorrow is the weekend.
yyy: a happy man, still believes in magic, Santa and the weekend.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №97316
 01.05.2014
in the bowl)

from the forum of mommies: I understood sitting in the chair at the dentist that the childbirth was not so scary and sounded him this, but he thought that I was young and not giving birth and disproved my words on what I said that by my experience I am talking and his sister supported me in this which he was surprised.

In the quote, of course, a lot of things I would like to adjust) but it's a caveat!! The day made my day.)

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №97315
 01.05.2014
From 4pda, discussing the new Assassin’s Creed mobile game, but not about Assassin’s Creed
See also: EEA I downloaded Cut of Rope 2, and no subassays are needed=)
BBB: I downloaded Flappy48, and no Amnesty is needed ;D
I’ve put NFS Underground 2 and I don’t understand what you’re talking about.
rgh: I changed the batteries in the tetris and I don't understand your conversations at all)))
DDD: I have drawn a field for crossbowers - please keep silent)
Don’t stop my fingers from fighting.)

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №97314
 01.05.2014
Do you need anything from me?)

yyy: Your clothes, your weapons and your motorcycle

xxx is =))
I can offer - a sweater (it definitely falls on it) a sleeve and a bicycle ^__^

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