bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 74 - ] Comment quote №47652
 19.05.2011
I gave it yesterday, fucking. At the seminar with the lecturer did not match the task, but I was absolutely sure of my right. He asked the group’s answers and said, “And we are more!” and I didn’t think about it: “And the Germans were more!” and “How good that he’s a man with a sense of humor.”

[ + 81 - ] Comment quote №47651
 19.05.2011
Let all the roadmen of Russia go to heaven... But they will be carried out from hell on all the roads they have ever built, having previously planted on the road. And if someone picks at least once, all the way from the beginning.

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №47650
 19.05.2011
and Jake:
Once, my sister Lisa and I had to share one bed, because my parents’ friends were staying at home. At night, my penis got up, I hoped Lisa was asleep, but she turned to me. I thought she was going to say something now, but instead she kissed me and we had sex with her. For the last three years, I’ve been fucking with her every night.

by Anonymous:
Why did you write this here? to praise?

and Lisa:
and Jake! How could you? This is our secret!

The Father:
and Lisa? and Jake? My mom can read it!

Mother :
Lisa, why didn’t you tell me? I will go to you now, share this member with me)

The Grandfather:
You all seem disgusting to me!

The Grandmother:
All in you!

[ + 62 - ] Comment quote №47649
 19.05.2011
Do we bring the cat?
No, we will bring the snake.
Fu, they are ugly!
Cats rub and scratch!
I want a cat! let’s call her Isadora, please Asya.
I don’t want a cat! the snake’s tongue is rugged.
Tagged: idiot
M: hysterical
We will take a child faster than an animal.
M: How did you say that?

[ + 71 - ] Comment quote №47648
 19.05.2011
xxx: Today in the news said that the leaders of "Orehovsky" were detained.
yyy: almonds, peanuts and fountains?

[ + 64 - ] Comment quote №47647
 19.05.2011
Lunch, we go in the car with the boss (it-division), or rather we stand on the lighthouse near our office. An economist from our own organization begins to cross the road, at this time the green light is lit for us, the boss touches, the economist looks at the car, at the boss, and is taken off the road by races. The boss whispers under his nose:
He knows I’m not going to stop.

[ + 63 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №47646
 19.05.2011
Can the joke about disconnecting water already be written?

[ + 69 - ] Comment quote №47645
 19.05.2011
About the alarms:
I wake up and turn it off immediately, then sleep again doesn't help ((
WOW: and you put away to get up.)
No, it did not help to try. and ((
WOW: then hide it, or better generally in the closet under the lock, and hide the key too.
XHH: You would still offer there another shade of what, guess the mystery and the castle to open, or until you collect a Rubik's cube fucking open. And here I am so sleepy standing in cowards, marrying and collecting it.
WOW: Oh, and from the closet at this moment the alarm will sing a theme from Ford Boyd. ))

[ + 60 - ] Comment quote №47644
 19.05.2011
Theme in the forum:
Hello to everyone. My name is Cindy. The fact is that I have loved a guy for 8 years, but all this time he has a different one.
His name is Ken and his girlfriend is Barbie.

[ + 63 - ] Comment quote №47643
 19.05.2011
The main evil of the Earth, Osama bin Laden died about 5 years ago by his death. This was known to the highest ranks of European and Russian intelligence. Fool, it is like in childhood in the last horse in hiding played - everyone will run to hide, and in the houses, and the driver is looking for everything, looking for it, looking for it... :-)

[ + 70 - ] Comment quote №47642
 19.05.2011
Beloved, is it true that I have been given to you by God?
I don’t know what sins I have...

[ + 84 - ] Comment quote №47641
 18.05.2011
On the third day of work, they brought a handful of gastarbayters from Tajikistan, worked together for about 2 weeks, did not communicate because the language was bad and here in the smoking room the first conversation for all the time, one of the visitors asks:
In which city are we?

[ + 70 - ] Comment quote №47640
 18.05.2011
We had a girl at the faculty - a modest, cute, handsome, blue-eyed - a wonderful angel with 3m size. At the time of writing the paper was finished. She wanted to ask a sheet of paper from the teacher. But this expression has a coincidence with another well-known phrase. As a result, the following dialogue took place:
Prep: May I help you?
Yes, I just need a piece of sheet.
We stepped under the parties, and the pad floated into its place, shrinking and shrinking... And already from there I passed a leaflet with the words "It's not what you exactly asked... But I believe..."

[ + 87 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №47639
 18.05.2011
Mom, you are a fraud!
I am not a coward, I am a coward.

40 years of mother.

[ + 60 - ] Comment quote №47638
 18.05.2011
On the website of a prestigious medical centre:
Venereology
Actions "Healthy member of society" - 1800 rubles! to

[ + 55 - ] Comment quote №47637
 18.05.2011
A quiet night let you dream... well, let nothing dream... let you sleep.

[ + 94 - ] Comment quote №47636
 18.05.2011
Coming to a family mate in a visit, he desperately crashes into the WOW. To destroy loneliness, I ask:
How many subscriptions per month?

A friend’s cry from the neighbor’s room:
The damn! Is it still paid?? to

[ + 56 - ] Comment quote №47635
 18.05.2011
Comments on a photo of the dark courtyard, processed in "Photoshop".

by Oleg Перезябов
There is a lack of young people in the area.

Evgeny Rudakov
They are photographing ?

Misha is clear
Where to go in Photoshop to do this!! to

by Oleg Перезябов
Here are they.

[ + 85 - ] Comment quote №47634
 18.05.2011
Comrade works as a guide on the train Moscow-Kerch says:
Moscovites in the summer when they go to the sea, as soon as they enter the train think that they are already at sea, the women in swimsuits walk, the children with swollen circles, and the men in slats and masks.

[ + 58 - ] Comment quote №47633
 18.05.2011
In the zoo, a mother with an adult daughter (aged 17) choose a means so that the cat does not hate the apartment. On the shelf there are different sprays, such as "antihadine" and so on.
That’s going to be for Barca!
Mother : Aha And this is what I will do to you, and I will do it to you.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna