bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 17 - ] Comment quote №97153
 27.04.2014
Small to second grade HPI. We don’t get the scholarship, we can help.
But Kharkiv city is large, temptations are enough, and cash is not.
We discussed the options on Skype and agreed that
A student of a political school is the optimal option - "secret buyer" in a network of bordels.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №97152
 27.04.2014
The word "chevalier" (chevalier) originated precisely from the French same "chval" (cheval, horse) and literally means "the rider". That is all right, the French peasants called horses -))))
and...
The French asked the peasants for horses to travel to Paris. How do you ask if you don’t know Russian? Naturally, repeating "shval, shval" and throwing a finger at the horse. The peasants, when they saw another Frenchman at the threshold, said, “The swallow has come again.” So it went. From there, the word "sharomyzhnik" is a distorted French "sherami" = dear friend. A "Shantra" appeared in the epoch of the bloom of the fortress theaters: so they called those who were not suitable for the opera (in French, шантра pa = will not sing).
Interestingly, all three humiliating words are on the letter "S".

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №97151
 27.04.2014
I am a girl who works as a salesman in a 24-hour car shop.
At night, heavy rain, a guy knocks at the window:
Girl, do you have tires?
(And the tires on the ducks just brought yesterday).
How long are you?
What do you have, in size?? to
- Of course, you can take a straight sample.It will be long-cut.
I extend the roulette to him.
His eyes were rounded:
I asked about condoms.! to

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №97150
 27.04.2014
Duke Nukem: What about Japanese advertising? There is a different mentality and mindset. Show them our advertisement, where the suicide rate will soar by 146 percent.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №97149
 27.04.2014
"We have an average person can not afford a mortgage at wage at all."
Believe me, you are not losing anything. My friend in the loan in the bank was refused, he never understood our phrase - "God has protected you."

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №97148
 27.04.2014
Time heals wounds, but does not smooth wrinkles.

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №97147
 27.04.2014
To discourage the little daughter from climbing into the closet and moving things, I said that there was a evil uncle sitting there. One evening I was watching TV with my husband, she goes into the room and asks, "Daddy has gone out of the closet?"
I convinced my husband what...

[ + 51 - ] Comment quote №97146
 27.04.2014
They say that God created every creature in a pair... I am ashamed to ask, “Nobody has seen my creature?”

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №97145
 27.04.2014
XXX: There is an Orgasm Cocktail
YYY: Where is it?
XXX: In the sushi where we sit
xxx: Quantum, Bailey and cream
Yyy: We had a club a few years ago, we and our fellow members went there to celebrate something. There were Minet cocktails, Kunilingus and what else in that spirit.
Then I gave a cocktail to my neighbor, and she then called her husband and told him that Phil had given her Minet.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №97144
 27.04.2014
“Your interlocutor is aware of his nonsense. Wait to. It may take some time.”

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №97143
 27.04.2014
Go now, answer the subject matter! Yes or No?! to
WOW : Yes.
What is "Yes"?! to

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №97142
 27.04.2014
News from HUB:

With the ISS will try to transfer data to Earth using lasers.

One of the comments:

It is terrible to live when the ISS flies over your head with a ray of death.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №97141
 27.04.2014
With iXBT:
XXX: A funny bag has been discovered. PDU 400th - if a cat is smoothed next to the controller, then the lighting is turned on on the controller from the statics.

YYY: You need to update the cat’s firmware so that its signals do not load onto the controller.
Is there a reverse effect? If the controller is smoothed, does the cat's eye lighting turn on in the dark?

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №97140
 27.04.2014
In Omsk, the "State" monument in the form of a ball went off from the station due to a hurricane wind. This is by the residents of the city. "Light April winds and small rainfall in the form of road signs of trees and advertising shields... places take down the roof. The ball has been destroyed by the wind, the shields are falling, the roofs of the houses are broken down, the cars are blowing up...”, they write.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №97139
 27.04.2014
The brain is like a Facebook account: everyone has it, but most don’t use it.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №97138
 27.04.2014
Article on the Belarusian website about how the stars of Belarus looked 10 years ago, and how they look now.
The best comment:
XXX: Who are all these people?

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №97137
 27.04.2014
One girl was so afraid to buy in the store excess that she did not buy the necessary >_<

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №97136
 27.04.2014
When I started menstruating at 13, Dad explained to him what was happening to me.

Happy children! One day my sister came to me and cried, “I have bleeding!”I told her about an hour about what was going on with her (the age difference was 11 years). He calmed and explained what to do. After a while, I asked if she had talked to her parents. The answer killed: she told her mother, her mother kept silent, and then brought her the Encyclopedia of a young woman with the words: “Here everything is written.”

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №97135
 27.04.2014
clarified
<<< < 1. I don’t need a car, I have legs, a bike, and money for a taxi, if anything.
— — —
4 is Potato, stuck in the exhaust pipe - you will get a cock.
— — —
6 is The warning, glued super glue on your forehead will help you, the dude, navigate the city.>>>
and...
Installation foam is more efficient
Silicate glue in this situation gives a better educational effect
Personally, I act differently - I approach and ask you to stop tapping the lawn / fence the sidewalk, etc. I take photos on the spot and send them to the local GIBDD by electronic.
If you do not send anonymously, but leave your coordinates with a request to respond - respond to the request.
The fines paid by such drivers are much more compelling than the above described "popular" methods.
Be kind to each other.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №97134
 26.04.2014
From the forum, on the topic of snowfall at the end of April:

I went to the kindergarten today for the child and then went to the section in ski glasses... I also wore the child. I heard a bunch of enthusiastic screams from the men. Something like "It’s our way! So strange, without glasses, the opposite sex has not paid me and my children so much attention for a long time.
It's straight cooler than a miniature and huge heels.

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