A TV journalist takes an interview with a woman on the street.
Do you agree to amendments to the Constitution?
of course. We will have more qualified teachers and doctors in the country. The literacy of the population will increase, the number of talented scientists will increase.
A slightly faint journalist asks:
Sorry, in which country?
In the ours.
Which city are you from?
From Tel Aviv.

How by myself? How to work? As a family?

and normal.

Well, well that is normal. Borrowing 5,000 dollars?

Kiss me on my shoulder.

Why on the shoulder?

You have also begun from far away.

My grandfather had three pigs. They were called Chruscha, Phila and Stepa. They said they were my pigs and they should be watched. I regularly went to feed them and clean the pork. It was fun and very exciting. In playing I imagined myself as a fairy tale hero who would help the pigs and defeat the evil wolf. I was terribly jealous of my friends when I talked about these amazing and already grown-up beauties.



One morning I noticed a large number of men and women at the pig farm. They laughed and drank. I heard the wild whisper of my pigs and ran toward them. After running, I saw how the neighbor’s grandfather, by a clever movement, killed Phile, who was lying on his side. I was caught and held, laughing at my hysteria.

Further, I remember the smell of a petroleum lamp, smelling the death of the intestines in the pelvis, a bunch of people who chose a piece better.



The words of my grandmother:

What are you cheering? But you still have a cock, call it Petya!

Two years ago, I went on a business trip to America. At some point, a black man was trying to slip ahead of me. I asked him to get up at the end of the line. He instantly picked up the air in his chest and said very loudly and hysterically, “Is that all because I’m black? “!”

I am a non-conflict person and quite scary to aggressive people who are bigger than me. But at that moment, without expecting myself, I calmly gave up:

“No is. That’s because I’m Russian” and with the wildest Russian accent added, “do you have any problems?”

There was silence in the cafe. The black man was slightly discolored and left. I never understood because of the fear of stereotypes about dangerous Russians or he did not know what to answer because of a system error.



P.S. Cassir was noticeably respectful to me.



P.S. Then I tried all day to figure out where I got this last phrase from. And I remembered, it was in the performances of the standaper, he told how he was saved by the Russian accent in a critical situation) It really saves and I did not think that this whole Russian beetle could ever be useful in life. Thanks to the American cinema for the images of the Russians shot on their heads.

We go here with our wife somewhere on the street and we hear someone calling us.

The neighbors! Neighbors and greetings! - runs to us the grandmother of God, a neighbor from a rental apartment, from which we left a year ago.

Do you want to move back? She asks with hope in her eyes.

Yes, we live in our own now, what, bad neighbors?

Not that word! They got already! constantly, some

They have walks, and you are so good, I didn’t even hear you, well, except when you did it!

Here, my wife and I red, and the neighbor stands and remembers the word,

She shows her hands with some undue gestures. We are like Azerbaijani tomatoes.

On the guitar! She finally remembers and continues to gesture with her hands.

One of my acquaintances has relatives living in the U.S. and recently he went to them and told me a story about how he was invaded by African Americans. Further from his words.

One day we decided to go to the store and buy my son an ice cream. We went to the nearest store, we chose, we approached the box office, the line was small, only three people. While we stood waiting for our turn, two men came with beer and asked them to miss, saying they were in a hurry. I said we’re quick, buy ice cream and go. They started riding until it came to me that I was a racist and I didn’t want to miss them because they were black. Then came the insults and insults. We bought ice cream and quickly got out of there. And that’s how some black people are struggling for anything. Do you have anything against my opinion? ! to You are racist. And now everywhere.

The longer you live, the more you have of the past. Unfortunately at the expense of the future.

In the two hundred and thirty-fourth laboratory of the research and development bureau, developing the fuck knows what to please friends and fear enemies, for some reason there was a terrible shortage of cang pencil. Especially valued were the pencil type pull-push, where the griffle could be inserted on two sides and wrapped with blades of varying thickness. "Shooters" draw much faster - this will tell you any person who knows how to use a culman.

The Soviet pencil industry in the person of the design bureau could cover the deficit, but did not want to.

You have a pencil one for six months and that’s all. Grizzlies and blades take as much as you want, Wattman paper you want to save, thinking in your head, and I will not give pencil, do not ask. I gave it the last time, and you stitched it in your ears, or forgot it in the toilet cabin. No, no and no, and there is nothing to persuade me, I know where you are spending all the laboratory alcohol.

Something was wrong with the pencil. The week. The Month. A maximum of two months and the pencil mysteriously disappeared. Different brands and different hardness. Regardless of size and design. Drawing became uncomfortable, labor productivity fell and wooden scraps on the floor. The inscriptions on the body of the product "stolen from me" and "who denies - will fall asleep" did not help.

- You know what Sasha, - said the designer of the second category and chairman of the council of young specialists in one person to his colleague, if we and you from each salary will buy a pencil pencil each we will not ruin. And in a few months, the surrounding space will be saturated with material objects to such an extent that they will stop disappearing.

- You are right Yuri, - replied to him the newly elected secretary of the Komsomol organization and the designer of the first category, cheering in front of the sympathetic technician-laborator Olga Alexandrovna, - in order not to ruin with the guarantee I propose to do this in turn. Thus the saturation of space will happen a little later, but for eternity it is a perfect nonsense.

So we agreed. During the conversation, I heard nothing, watched from a distance the leader of the group, Viktor Nikolaevich, who also suffered from a shortage of cang pencil.

The salary was issued today, the next day Sasha brought five contractual office products, put four on the table, and one immediately started drawing the assembly drawing of the press form for the product "Granat".

How about the process? I asked Yuri’s friend during the overdose, is the space saturated?

"Even as full," Sasha pulled a cigarette "Cosmos," I had two pencils missing before lunch. He seemed to have gone nowhere. To the first department and the library for the reference book. And most importantly, there is no one in the laboratory except Olga and Viktor Nikolaevich, in the journeys all. I'll go back to the first department now, I'll leave the pencil on the table, and you'll see.

Yuri looked at it. The leader of the group approached the table, looked at the drawing and shyly looked around and put the pencil in the load pocket of the coat. There were three pencil pockets in that pocket.

Friends discussed the situation.

Is he a kleptoman? "Can not the leader of the group, a communist, a candidate of science, and an elderly man, who is forty-three years old, throw pencil for profit?

- Or a schizophrenic, - supported him Yuri, also confident in the moral qualities of Viktor Nikolaevich, - on this you will not earn much.

The discussion was interrupted by the unexpected appearance of a forty-three-year-old elder, a candidate of science, a communist, and the leader of the group.

The comrades! “He started from a distance,” came the time of a tough and difficult conversation for me, which cannot be avoided. Everyone knows that in the laboratory the cangue pencil is missing. Today I conducted an experiment and realized that the cause lies in Sasha, who was recently mistakenly elected secretary of the Komsomol organization.

What did you do, Viktor Nikolaevich? He asked Sasha.

- And from the fact that I have you today experimentally upper four pencils, and you didn't even get upset. Where do you get so many unplanned office questions?

Thus the philosophical experiment on the material saturation of space faced a counter-experiment in the field of ethics. That only emphasizes the scientific nature of this laboratory.

Do you remember what the movie was called about the girl who accidentally got into the show business, made a career there, but chose to return to a normal life?
The Kashan?

In our country the well was without a cover and a wandering dog hit there. The well is not deep, in a couple of rings of all, and there was not much water, but the dog could not get out, and therefore walked with a good dog mat to the whole district. We were not in the country at the time, a couple of hours later two neighbors (40+ and 70+) crossed through our site to save the unfortunate animal. They didn't come up with anything smarter than handing a dog (although long boards were rolled nearby, and a staircase was on the street nearby), for which this frightened animal grabbed his teeth.

The result was extensive, equal wounds, a hospital, seams and probably 40 rabies injections.

The next day a neighbor came up with demands for treatment and moral damage, said you have a well on the site is not closed and in general, my daughter suffered from for you, bla bla bla. To the reasonable question of what kind of shit she decided to give a hand to the wandering dog, she replied something like "the count was for seconds, the dog died and there was no time to think." A few months later, she tried to demand something from us, wrote some complaints, and so on.

My mother and son are three years old and are on the bus and playing games. The mother begins the word, the little one ends.

You are mine...

and Zik.

You are my co...

and TIK.

You are mine for...

The heart...

When a government has nothing to boast about, it begins to boast about the past.

My office is in Uritsky, right on the border with the private sector. Somewhere there lives a man with a pony who rides children on the Colour Boulevard.
He often hits me in the morning, when he walks to the square, where he usually returns with the onset of darkness. By that time, he is already thoroughly subdued and rides, sitting on a barley pony with his brushes. In his hands he always has a bank of beer, his apparently a check shot in front of the house.
Pony, at the same time, he no longer pursues and does not stumble, he knows the road well and does not rush home. Only occasionally he quietly scratches and then the man slides and something whispers to him in the ear decorated with colorful sticks.
Tolerance is called interpersonal relationships.
In quarantine, the boulevard was closed, there was no one to ride and they were completely missing.
And here, apparently, yesterday allowed, I go down to the car in the evening, I see this man at home on a pony. The same crazy, with an unchanged pot, everything is as it should be.
I don't know why, but I was delighted with him and even greeted him with my hand.
He was not surprised at all, only quietly sneered as a familiar and went on.
Cock-cock to Cock
I think we will go out now, once such urban-forming enterprises have worked out.

People who have a 15% PDF - write!
Svetlana

Sberbank learns from its mistakes. Today, while trying to connect with a service provider, the robot answered my questions:

Half-life of radium

Half-life of plutonium

He praised for his desire for knowledge.



I had to ask a question that she did not answer. I'm not going to sound it out so as not to teach the robot even this.)



yyy: Blind seems to me useless, in my opinion we should instead teach him everything, just imagine the Sberbank bot who knows the answer to almost any question, it's like Google only better.



zzz: And Bot will know all the secrets of the universe, will walk on the surface of the sun, but... he will not be able to help in order to return you 300p taken for random subscriptions.

At the previous referendum, the majority voted for the USSR, after which it was liquidated together with the constitution.

Freedom of Speech in American. not my own.

Very interesting story. and indicative. A New York-based teacher, Deborah Morse-Canningham, spoke on her FB page about what privileges are. “Privileges are when you wear shoes for $200 without working anywhere in your life. Or when living on a benefit, you buy Beats headphones for $300. When you don’t pay for mobile, when in social housing you don’t have to pay for water and electricity, when rising taxes don’t affect the amount of food on your family’s table. “Privileges are when you go to protest against everything you don’t like, without thinking about having to take a break at work, when you can have as many children as you want, regardless of income, just sending them to a free kindergarten.”

It was a general, unfathomable reasoning. In this text, the words “negroes”, “African Americans” and “black” were never heard. What do you think she was accused of? I guess it was racism, of course. Those whose lives matter immediately recognized themselves in this group portrait. And very offended. They don't know the Russian proverb - it's not necessary to pen on the mirror, when the birth is wrong.

And immediately a non-reverse punitive mechanism was launched. Deborah is still a teacher, but it seems to be a short time. There is already a petition demanding her dismissal – ten thousand signatures.

The mayor of New York City, De Blasio, is personally and deeply outraged by such overwhelming racism and has given a team to conduct an internal investigation. I wonder what will be investigated? Will they study her entire internet history under a microscope? They will go into her genealogy – and suddenly there is someone from the Ku Klux Klan or from the Communists. That is to say, another demonstrative, educational public mess is being prepared. And the personal fate of the clever, remarkable teacher Deborah Morse-Canningham does not care anyone. In modern America, there is no force that could protect it. There are no such lawyers accused. Remember the Chinese Hunweibins.

He gave up his seat to his grandmother in the bus, and she said, “Al one pidaras gave up...”

Looking for a recipe on the Internet

It is just PPC.

Dinner in 15 minutes:

Cook the meat for 12 hours.

Soak the beans at night.

Grow ananas on the window.

At the beginning of the 2000s, his parents were engaged in the sale of vegetables and daily traveled to the neighboring Kazan. I was taken care of by Grandpa and Grandpa. I was their first granddaughter and all the grooming knots were filled with me.

My grandmother worked as a cook in the school dining room, and my grandfather was there next to the cottage. There was nowhere to give me, so I was mistaken either with my grandmother, wrapping meat and soups with schoolchildren, or my grandfather, where I turned into a master's coal business.

One day my grandfather got sick and I was at home with him. He was lying on the couch and I was playing next to him. A brilliant idea came into my head to help my grandfather recover, I approached and asked him if I could inject him? Without thinking backwards, he agreed... How did he know that in a second I confidently put a water-filled syringe into his hip... That day I first heard the obscene expressions:) I was not punished, because I first asked for permission, and even more so nobody understood how among my toys this syringe was...

My grandfather is 70 years old today. I called him to congratulate him that he was seriously ill. And 20 years later I heard in the cellphone, "Nunny, come, fly me, make an injection..."