I just remembered one case.
When my husband ran on me for something, I did the following to stop the quarrel:
She took his hand, raised him to the chest and asked, "Dear, it seems that my breasts have grown. See also"
The dispute ended immediately.
c) from the

Our country is so harsh that it has a state standard on road holes.

to this
— — — —
I am coming from work today, in front of a truck. On it the finger banally writes "Wash me", and below another handwriting "Time is not!".
— — — —
That fucking everything. Yesterday I saw a dirty six with the inscription "Wash me", and underneath it the answer: "She is punished."
I do not understand this banally.

to this:
They turned off the hot water...rejoice idiots! I am in the apartment +30, on the street +32. And from one crane a hot water, and from the other a boiling water!!! >_<
--------
This is where all the hot water is made.

Pulled up =)
There were two disputes here today. Girl with Boy
the guy told her that she would not push back 30 times) she said that she would push back) well and on wish
He says
If you don’t get away, you can do whatever I want. Even if it falls
She thought and said.
and well. But if I shut down, the desire of you is puzzled by Ian.
Garlic
and ROFL
Has he refused? and ;)
Pulled up =)
Then he was a little upset (but still decided she’t go away).
This was the third time she succeeded.
Now he will go to the pharmacy with rabbit ears and a tail tail.
Garlic
:D
Pulled up =)
I will buy condoms.
Not just buying.
In short, he will say that he needs all the tastes they have.
but only one) and he must persuade the seller to give him one by one. and then ask
Do you have carrots?
You will answer that there is no)
If I don’t have carrots, I don’t need any.
and remove)
Garlic
and ROFL
Pulled up =)
The main thing is that the seller did not catch up and that tail did not move anywhere.
...
That’s why no one plays with me.)

They thought the army would make him a man, and it turned out to be a senior!

Not one of my acquaintances with a neighbor had such a story.
It was somewhere in the 90s, but the Union was...
The summer. The June. The Saturday. Earlier in the morning. The 5th Floor. The man in a jacket, shorts and boots, naturally from a light body, went to take the garbage.
He smoked, threw out the garbage and, returning, at the exit from the entrance he encounters his friend, who goes to Crimea for a week. The car is already at the entrance... and they have another “free seat”...
The friend said, “Well what, Knee? Give it! Come with us!”
The knee obviously resists: “Yes, we are! How is BL? I don’t have money or passports.”
He says, “Give me money and a passport! They went!“”
The knee did not resist for a long time. He drops the garbage bowl behind the entrance door and... he travels with the kids for a week to Crimea!
How his wife was looking for this miracle a week is a separate story.
When a week later the car came to the house, this Knee in the same shorts, t-shirt and boots, but the baby burned and again from the body, as nothing happened, gets hidden in the entrance behind the door hole and pi@duet home.
Further, a nonsense scene from the "Revizor"... The wife of ohu@which could only say: "Bl@! “Cola, where were you?”
The stranger unwaveringly shows the bucket: "The rubbish carried out!" (They are

The future of our country belongs to our children! We even know the names of these children.

The subject of calling.
Waiting for his turn. In front of me was a recruiter, a lieutenant who graduated from the KII of the Ministry of Interior of the Russian Federation. He had worked for several days in the district department of the militia and appeared on the calling commission in shape and with a tabular weapon. We are launched by three or four people. It was his turn. He shows a paper that he works in the agencies and he is released from service, to which the Commissioner (Colonel) said:
“And now we will close the door, break your certificate, break you to zero, give out the form and you will go to serve in Severomorsk.
What he answered:
“I’ll shoot you in the head now, and I’ll write in the report that there was an attempt on your side to take possession of the weapon and that’s all. And I will be nothing.

You could see the face of the whole community.

21st century engineers on server plantations

I sent a quote from an old friend.
___________________________________
From an interview with Russian military experts on the five-day war with Georgia:

V R RHow was the connection of Russian troops in Georgia?

K.M and R.P.No, there was virtually no one. When our units arrived in Georgia, they acted completely disorderly. The desanters fought independently and as they were trained - only forward, eliminating on the way everything that can resist. They went to the Georgian capital because they did not know that the command wanted them to stop. And they would have taken Tbilisi if they had not been pursued by an officer who gave the orders orally.
___________________________________________________

xxx: to fuck with him from Tbilisi, Edak could have captured Ankara :D

<lolmaus15881> Big Mac contains 430 Kcal. 75 kg per 1 m = 0.18 j. In order to burn a bigmack, a person weighing 75 kg needs to climb 2.4 km!
<Topcat[eee]> agah ))) and if a person descends from a height of 2.4 km, he will generate a bigmack ;)
Binadamu> I think if a person quickly descends from a height of 2.4 then in the process of flight he will have full pants of bigmakers

LevelDog: You’ve already gotten rid of your tricks!! Go on fuck!! You just want to get rid of it, the demons are finished!! to
I’m here to read UG, not any humorous shit!! to

And where did the GMO Cheburaška - Red App go? and (

xxx: I am about***al magnetic =(
Tagged: hahaha
XXX is not funny.
YYY: You’re all in your little problems, you can’t even pay attention to how global the universe is.
The universe is as insignificant to me as I am to it.

I was so bored that I started writing my diploma.

A friend (D), who has forgotten his glasses at home, with the skins (C) sitting on the alley in the center of Ulyanovsk, communicate. A African (A) passes by.
D: That’s Patrick, we’re learning together, a good guy! I am happy, I greet you. Stand up Patrick!
A, hearing the "Stand" from the skins, naturally, rubs the fifth, D, not understanding what it is about, runs after him. The other side is shattered. After a half-hour pursuit, A was thrown into an impasse, where he crumbled into a piece. Approaches D, looks into the face of A: "No, not Patrick." He turns and leaves with the skins...

BLA, today from the morning the rainbow was normal, I was driving in the trolley on a rabbit. In the vicinity of Qigladze in the front door crashed a bombardment, people in search of rescue transferred to the end of the transport, through two stops entered the same delicious in the back, gathered in a dense and well-consolidated group of people took defensive positions in the center of transport, but the insidious misery took over, the Pushkin in the middle entered a third, thus breaking people into two small groups, condemning them to independent survival in this evil world.
I was born with the idea that it was a clearly planned action)))

xxx: I have a microwave oven "Horizon" - the third year works like a clock.

YYY: I understand that nothing works in the oven except the clock.

ByeKitty: Dad decided to make a birthday present
He says, you see it, my wallet lies - open it, everything you find is yours! Naturally, he left there exactly the amount he wanted me to find. But it sounds like it! :)
Only the dad didn’t account for his credit card with the scratched PIN code on it.
But he said all his life that his word was iron. Therefore, only scratching my teeth wanted to note well.