bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №80705
 24.04.2013
To whom is this monument?
In honor of the leader.
The leader of Maya?
The First Leader...
The Lord_U

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №80704
 24.04.2013
Specialists in the field of culture and art claim that the most popular phrase that sounds in the Tretyakov Gallery looks like this: "O!! That is it!"

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №80703
 24.04.2013
It is an uncomfortable feeling when a friend in a conversation complains that she feels like a prostitute, and you do not understand: whether she complains or boasts...

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №80702
 24.04.2013
XXX: All about it.
You know the song of Leningrad, and I am made of meat.
YYY: Of course
Xxx: I was here literally a few days ago to learn that there is still singing "The worst thing that can happen - I will be a pidar"
XXX: happening
xxx: I thought before that they were singing "The worst thing that could happen is the STADO PIDARAS". I thought, strange, of course, but yes – scary...

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №80701
 24.04.2013
with 4pda about the expected flagship from LG

the device will be so thin that there will be no room on the ends for the locking button and the volume button - they will be put on the front panel

The battery will be carried in a separate suitcase.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №80700
 24.04.2013
I sit with a child of acquaintances (10 years old), lunch. The child did not eat the soup, I pour into the sewer and say:
Well, we fed the crocodile that lives in your bathroom!
The child looks at me with huge eyes and says:
Julia Petrovna, did you play in Swompi?

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №80699
 24.04.2013
The question is, how long have you been working in this organization? The customer replied: from 8:00 to 20:00. and with a very serious expression of the face.

[ + 55 - ] Comment quote №80698
 24.04.2013
A colleague said:
I went to the bank on Saturday. The people are few and the door is closed to a magnetic lock * which opens if a card is spent *.
She did her business at the bank and went out. The door is closed.
I thought that in order to open the door, you need to press a button, like in the office.
I found a button next to the door. It says open the cover, press the button. So I pressed. The fire alarm functioned. The siren runs, everyone runs in panic. Her feet took away.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №80697
 24.04.2013
zorraestelar:after my French it turns out that all the French speak English perfectly :)

[ + 46 - ] [9 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №80696
 24.04.2013
In Europe, people with disabilities are “people with increased needs” and in Russia they are “people with disabilities”. This is the whole mentality (

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №80695
 24.04.2013
Discussion of Football Expert
xxx : yes and Bubnov - a man from the mountain, not an expert) he is already a scandalist and a showman rather than an analyst
xxx : analytics :D is straight like fatality, only much worse

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №80694
 24.04.2013
News

In Russia, a man could not open a stolen bottle of beer. The Pindos spy.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №80693
 24.04.2013
The post on the hashtag "Yandex 23 minutes was blocked by Rostelecom".
Commentary: “Who threw the valley on the controller?“!”

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №80692
 24.04.2013
From correspondence with "Business Lines" (DL):
I: Good morning, please tell us the cost of courier delivery from your warehouse to the recipient.
D: Good day to you! Has the cargo arrived?
I : No. They are only interested in pricing to form a budget.
Please indicate the freight parameters.
I: 1200mm x 600mm x 350mm. Weight not more than 12 kg.
Q: Which car car carries the cargo?
I am a tenant.
DW: Do you know the brand of the car on which the delivery is carried out?
I have no information about the car brand.
DL: Unfortunately, I can’t tell you the amount because I don’t know all the terms of delivery.

I slowly go under the table... The Post of Russia slowly matures a competitor...

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №80691
 24.04.2013
I am going to go to Gaia for the second time.
Eedem-edem, as if everything is okay and here the gaez asks to stop in a place where it is forbidden. Waiting for confirmation of stop and receipt of permits
You cannot park here!
You can, you don’t give up.
B is I

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №80690
 24.04.2013
How did you meet ZZZ?
YYY: We studied together in high school.
WOW: What about you?
HH: And we are in college.
She studied, and I taught.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №80689
 24.04.2013
xxx: I can’t understand that. Is Misha a merchant or a Jew?
YYY: Is there any difference?

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №80688
 24.04.2013
I sit with my mom in the kitchen. She thoughtfully looks at the rabbit (yes, I have such a beast) and says:
And when you, the rabbit, die, we will make you a fool. The perseverance...
The Internet conquers the minds of people even of middle age.

[ + 49 - ] Comment quote №80687
 24.04.2013
I fucked Yulia yesterday.)
How did you fuck her when she left me?
Who was lying in the bedroom?
See also: Anton

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №80686
 24.04.2013
In short: The secretary had such a bust that she could only work on the computer blindly.

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