bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №96372
 07.04.2014
xxx: Johansson is good
yyy: I do not perceive actresses whose only talent is breasts
xxx: Ambassadors from the world film community think you’re wrong [link to the list of Johansson awards and nominations]
YYY: It is very simple. Movies from the world film community love breasts
That's why DiCaprio still doesn't have an Oscar

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №96371
 07.04.2014
Why are there no sports competitions? ?
The rich are not rich anymore.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №96370
 07.04.2014
Olympics in Ukraine
The Russian language. The winners
and executed.

[ + 8 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №96369
 07.04.2014
A acquaintance said:
In the kitchen with my husband. My husband is watching news on TV. After a while, thoughtfully says: Lena, first you were going to go to Egypt to rest. There was a coup. Then you decided to travel to Thailand. The opposition was also upset. You spit on everything and said that you will go to rest with your mother in Ukraine. Look what’s going on there now? Lena, stay at home!

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №96368
 07.04.2014
X: Yesterday Cobain exhibited the cades.

The murderer of Kurt Cobain committed suicide

X is lol. It is a good joke.)

Y: I wonder, was there anything left of him after he shot himself out of the gun?

X: Well, the cakes definitely remain)

Y: The cakes are. I even saw the picture, he was in the cages.

X: Do you pretend what piar he made for the brand of envelopes?)

Y is UGU. We were with Cobain even when Cobain wasn’t with us. Warm up your cold feet"

X: Da-da-X) "Conversion - the conductor of musicians into the world of the dead" "Conversion - on your feet regardless of the presence of the head"

Y: Converse and 40 calibers - together more interesting

X: Ah, the cynical fools

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №96367
 07.04.2014
The black cane? My parents once got a "bottle. My brother liked it very much, and then he often asked for it again. The second time he managed to get her already when he was studying at university. So don’t think that if you did, then the rest of the country ate caviar.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №96366
 07.04.2014
I understood. Russia is a very harmonious country. Until now, I had a phrase in my head:

In our country, laws are not made to be enforced, but to make everyone to blame.

And today I listened to Zhenetsky and the puzzle came about:

"We don’t need freedom, we need to have something to violate".)

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №96365
 07.04.2014
From the Manage Square in the car bag, the police took 10 people on the eve, who came out to support the convicted in the "bullish case". Some of them stood, stretching out their hands, as if holding a transparant. The police considered this a violation of the order of conduct of the public event, which threatens a fine. The men were detained in the department for more than four hours and were released after midnight.
Echo of Moscow
Commentary :
XXX: They will soon be jailed for invisible drugs and intangible weapons! For the silent incitement and the silent incitement!

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №96364
 07.04.2014
If they say to you, “You will go far,” don’t be deceived. Maybe they’re just going to send you.

[ + 56 - ] Comment quote №96363
 07.04.2014
I remembered one case that was told a few years ago. Maybe someone remembers.
In some American university announced a special preferential program to support African-American students (stipends and other benefits). A guy comes to the commission and says, “I’m an African-American, a student at your university. Please give me the privileges I deserve.” The commission looks at him and quietly shakes - a burning blonde, skin whiter than snow, blue-eyed. They said to him, “Young man, why are you lying to us? What kind of African American are you?” To which he calmly answers, “The most that is real. I was born and raised in South Africa. By nation – bur. My ancestors have lived in South Africa since the 16th century. I recently emigrated to the United States. And most of your black guys have only seen Africa on TV! If you are focusing only on the color of your skin, then say it straight! The racists...”
I don’t remember how the story ended, but I think the guy was rejected.

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №96362
 07.04.2014
Many have a cross on their neck and a knot in their souls.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №96361
 07.04.2014
On Friday I was late to work with a colleague living in a neighboring yard. My husband asked to take us. He drives so aggressively with me, and here we are late... In general, in five minutes, I hear Katkino bumping from the rear seat. I am her, what are you there? Do not interfere with a man, she prays ?

[ + 19 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №96360
 07.04.2014
The Friday. A day of jeans, and generally free clothes in the office. I sit with the boss, we discuss a couple of questions, and he came in bright green jeans. The boss goes up even higher, looking thoughtfully at him, and so forth: "Green he was."

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №96359
 07.04.2014
News about the withdrawal of the Mazda with a 2.5 litre engine due to the fact that spiders whip nests in the ventilation of such machines. The first comment:

Bl..., there even spiders understand that 2.5 atmospheric is good.)))

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №96358
 07.04.2014
We live in Barbados. State language English. The child also speaks to him. We go into the store and see real Arabs (this is rare here). Women in black, full parange - only eyes can be seen. The child looks at them and loudly says to the whole shop: Daddy! Look to! The Ninja!

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №96357
 07.04.2014
by Koshi:
Why do people not want to go to ballet?

The AK90:
Because ballet is fucking dull, boring.

by Koshi:
Well, thank you) I will answer, or my girlfriend needs to justify my "was not and do not want" =)

The AK90
Is your girlfriend cute?

by Koshi:
* no *

The AK90
Well, no, and say honestly from me that the fucking shit.
And beautiful lovers of ballet need to say that this kind of art is not in my taste, unlike, for example, classical theatrical performances.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №96356
 07.04.2014
I lost my ring on April 5, 2014. Peter, the race league. The memory of a loved one... Verney, please, has already lost all hope... 911 71 71 941

[ + 36 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №96355
 07.04.2014
Darth Alekseevich Vader?
Not badly...
Why not Bart Homerovich Simpson?

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №96354
 07.04.2014
Co-operation between NASA and Roscosmos could be suspended? Hm...
- ISS, John Jefferson on contact.
The White House says. You were scheduled to launch from orbit on a Russian ship today, I understand correctly?
and yes.
Do not sit on him. We no longer cooperate with the Russians. They are angry.
Sorry, but what should I do now? Always talking here?
“Of course not, we won’t leave our astronaut in trouble! We have a plan. Dress your scout, go out into the open space and jump into the ocean. Water should soften your landing.
Can I talk to NASA?! to
We are the main ones here! and jump!

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №96353
 07.04.2014
In all the world, the Jews are to blame for all the misfortunes. And only in Ukraine - Moscow.

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