bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №46732
 01.05.2011
<dracoša> Did you have sex?
<kpakadil> I had one. My friends told me about it the next day.
<drakoša> with another person?
<kpakadil> fucking Should it be with a man?

[ + 58 - ] Comment quote №46731
 01.05.2011
XXX: I and the girl broke up and I now have a manic desire to fuck any of her girlfriend)))
YYY: I fucked her two friends when I split up with her.
YYY: One truth before they split up
YYY: That’s why we split up.

[ + 103 - ] Comment quote №46730
 01.05.2011
<xxx> Religion as a member.
<xxx> If you have it, it’s okay.
<xxx> If you’re proud of what you have, that’s okay too.
<xxx> You just don’t have to fuck them all in sight.
<xxx> And even more so, you don’t have to force it into children.

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №46729
 01.05.2011
The exclusive show of the first wedding night of Prince William will be broadcast tonight on the nightly television channel Ren-TV.
© Bridesmaids

[ + 64 - ] Comment quote №46728
 01.05.2011
Buying a magazine:
Give me "Power" and "Money" at the same time!

Oh, and I remember:
- "Truths" no, "Russia" sold, there is only one "Work" left!


[ + 73 - ] Comment quote №46727
 01.05.2011
I asked a friend to take me with my son (6 years old). We go. by Oke.
We stop at the light. The son looks at the other cars and asks:
Why do we go in the luggage?! to

[ + 66 - ] Comment quote №46726
 01.05.2011
Talk about cats:
The cat smells from the mouth, what's the reason?
YYY: Well, that’s quite normal, he’s all licking himself – including his ass :)
xxx: I also have a lot of people at work who smell out of their mouth, but they can not lick their ass physiologically :)
There are also people from above. ;)

[ + 76 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №46725
 01.05.2011
I didn’t tell you yet, but my cat is always following me, this little cat pitch goes with me to the toilet and the shower, so today I didn’t let him go to the toilet with me, and he sat next to the toilet. Well, so George (the neighbor) decided that Stason (the cat) was waiting for the turn and stood up after him, went out of the room Jonic (the second neighbor) and stood up for George, I fuck, I admire this fucking apartment.

[ + 61 - ] Comment quote №46724
 01.05.2011
Not often in the early morning you will encounter a half-naked boomer, coming out of the sewerage, who asks:
- Young man, and you will not tell when the heating will be turned off, or there below, it is hot like in the bathroom...
I hanged for a moment, and felt like him... I honestly didn’t know what to answer)

[ + 87 - ] Comment quote №46723
 30.04.2011
I have one acquaintance here. He thus far thinks that it’s not right with the code or as if there’s something else to write down – he sits on a chair without a backbone (he’s specifically standing at the table at home) and pumps the press-hands behind his head and turns back, then rises up, and again turns away.
In general, everything would be nothing if he had not forgotten and at work (sitting on a rotating chair without a back) did not begin to do the same. At this time the boss with some inspector comes in with the words: "and this is one of our best employees..."
XHH: and they quietly watched for 5 minutes, as one of the best workers is hanging on a chair, and then shouting "ALLILUE!!"!" is running the code further...

[ + 77 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №46722
 30.04.2011
My favorite foolish habit is that he loves to sing songs from advertisements.
So I go home and the painting with oil - my favorite in new white trousers rotates near the mirror and sings "Every act is only yours, if the olives are with toboooo!".
Maybe I don’t know? O_O

[ + 80 - ] Comment quote №46721
 30.04.2011
In the days I bought myself new shoes.measured,all the norms, we go to the tent to calculate.here I notice the seller on the table a pad for pants from which 4 cigarettes "belomor".with a smile I am interested in not "kosyaki" lion answers that not and offers me "going at home".thank you,I will take one and at the same time I give him the money for shoes.at this very moment 2 police officers came...3 hours with the seller in SIZO stumbled)

[ + 85 - ] Comment quote №46720
 30.04.2011
The German online store has returned the money.
So they didn’t even answer your letters.
Oh yeah yeah yes. I swallowed a beer and wrote a letter to them. He said everything I thought about them and added that my grandmother in the 45s Berlin took. Two hours later, the money came back to the card.

[ + 67 - ] Comment quote №46719
 30.04.2011
He called me on Easter.
Are you eating eggs? ?

[ + 58 - ] Comment quote №46718
 30.04.2011
Romka believes that depression is the fate of idiots-women and weak men.
2 Throw it away and ask again.

[ + 105 - ] Comment quote №46717
 30.04.2011
I am a star in bed! I stretch my hands and feet and sleep, and if my fingers are melted, it’s a snowflake!!!! to

[ + 76 - ] Comment quote №46716
 30.04.2011
I walk past the restaurant, music plays, two drunk men stand at the entrance, a woman leaves the restaurant.
The first man (1) cries to the woman:
Hey come back! She does not hear.
1) The second man:
Fuck, I forgot her name.
He screams again:
Oh woman, wait for me!

[ + 67 - ] Comment quote №46715
 30.04.2011
(from a conversation about a guy's meeting with the girl's parents)

No, I knew her father was specific, but I realized the seriousness of the situation when he pulled out of his pocket and put the NOKIA 3310 on the table in the GOLDEN body!

[ + 62 - ] Comment quote №46714
 30.04.2011
Chuck Norris can beat the cyclope between his eyes.

[ + 117 - ] Comment quote №46713
 30.04.2011
We walk with my wife in the evening with the child, in the evening a pleasant child sleeps in a wheelchair and behind us catches a small crowd of drunken puppies with chubby behavior, screams on the whole street, etc. But here they notice us with the wheelchair and abruptly stop screaming and choir, half whispering sing "sleep my joy sleep..."To say that I chubby - nothing to say. Not everything is lost yet.)

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna