bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №126096
 29.03.2016
Greedangel (15:46:59 28/03/2016)
Do you remember what the fax is?
Dragon (15:48:49 28/03/2016)
No one knows him, but Dasha says we don’t have a fax.
Greedangel (15:49:07 28/03/2016)
Anna sent a fax.
Dragon (15:49:32 28/03/2016)
I just asked, including Daisy.
Dragon (15:49:51 28/03/2016)
There is no fax number.
Greedangel (15:50:01 28/03/2016)
The fax was sent by Anna.
Dragon (15:50:16 28/03/2016)
I do not argue.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №126095
 29.03.2016
Yes, the sea air is salt, iodized + needles around, it’s all fine, BUT!!! to
In all "Our" region of cleaning facilities is not the word at all! All, sorry, a lot of stupid melting into the sea.
And if up to 24 degrees of water can still neutralize this matter, then closer to the middle of the summer it is no longer the sea, but the intestinal-bacterial cocktail, which is spread by the current and on the wild beaches and on the city, the infections are overcrowded.
Therefore, if you want health from the sea with us, then avoid the peak of the heat in the middle of the summer and you will be lucky or yes, Europe will help.
All good and good mood!

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №126094
 29.03.2016
Comment to the news: "The actor and writer Yevgeny Grishkovets expelled from the hall a spectator who fell asleep during his performance"

And then he asked two laughing young men to go on stage and forced them to tell the hall that they had such a funny thing there. At the end of the evening, the actor and writer invited a spectator who spoke with a neighbor to continue the performance for him. Another viewer, who was writing a text message on his smartphone in the midst of the show, the famous director asked to repeat the part of the role he was playing now, and when the viewer could not, asked him to go out in the theater hallway and think about his behavior.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №126093
 29.03.2016
Bad is the technician who does not want to kill the designer.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №126092
 29.03.2016
The cheapest clothes shop.

Measure that swimsuit.
No, I don’t like the color.
A very good color!! and measure!

This Russian service.

[ + 51 - ] Comment quote №126091
 29.03.2016
I guarantee you that in five years we will live better than in Europe.

What will happen to them?

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №126090
 29.03.2016
You know, when a developer asks you what boolean is, it’s new, fresh sensations.
Yyy: "Do you know what Boolean is? Yes or No?and "

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №126089
 29.03.2016
After today’s phone call:
and Ophigete! The son in the army is not taken: double compression fractures of the spine were very long ago. It would be nothing, but he has been fighting for 5 years already. Directly disappointed!

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №126088
 29.03.2016
When did you make your first step towards the next billion?

He was born in the family of a hotel chain owner.

That’s it, a bit!

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №126087
 29.03.2016
Tallinn, 28 March 2016
The Ministry of Foreign Affairs of Estonia expressed concern in connection with the beginning in September 2015 of the bombing of ISIS objects by Russian bombers.

[ + 21 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №126086
 29.03.2016
Per I could get a bucket for that. In short, he decided not to drag the fate for his hair and left them in the metro corridor, and the girl was silent on very important matters, probably.

*bleding* metro corridor

Or not: the metro corridor! Avada to KEDAVRA!

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №126085
 29.03.2016
If you want to ruin your relationship, complain about it.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №126084
 29.03.2016
Colonel Mironov, like most of the military, was a supplier of army quotes. It means a group of students at the military department in front of the class, waiting for the teacher to open it. One starts pushing the other. The preponderance turns:
Tolstoy, do you know where to put your hands?! to
– I tried, Comrade Colonel, they don’t get in!
He thought he had knocked down the old soldier, but Mironov also did not use a word in his pocket, yet twenty years in the army. He turned the face on which there was a smile of hyena and, looking into the eyes of the student, with an oil voice said:
It’s not a problem, we’ll develop it soon.

[ + 36 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №126083
 29.03.2016
It is hard to do business alone.
The accountant is you.
The cleaner is you.
The seller is you.
The trucker who forgot and didn't go to work, putting the whole company under control - you.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №126082
 29.03.2016
And my six>
And my five copies:Here:Here:Here:Here:Here
Every time I put a pelvis on my head after I hang my washed clothes.
Katya is 26 years old.

Katy, let’s meet you, I am 30. and Sasha.

Three of them are there. Fede, 46 years old

Who do you like more, Katya or Sasha?

And suddenly that? O_O

Of course TAZ! Katyn basin is exactly what men like.
> Especially when her clothes are dry.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №126081
 29.03.2016
The Foreign:
If you call the Russian police and report that the car is wrongly parked in front of your house, which has blocked your departure, then in two weeks the answer will come that the owner of the car was fined for wrong parking.
######
If it is so in your country. And here... In two weeks, the answer will come that the indicated place of violation was not detected, and the date - 13 days after your appeal.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №126080
 29.03.2016
and ah! apparently, the cable section has decreased and the bytes are stuck in steel

Actually yes. The intersection decreased/broken (contact is, but it is “dredgling”), as a result - more errors in the transmission of the signal, more attempts to transmit the same package, as a result - a drop in useful speed. And for you: the bytes have become "trapped". I went right anyway.)

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №126079
 29.03.2016
A magnetophone sticker with the inscription "Clean Sound. POWERY BASES." looks luxurious on the Chinese washing machine.

[ + 35 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №126078
 29.03.2016
by stannum99:
Sometimes I go out with students. Today at the reception, the lady with a shock, broken nose and a bleach on the cheek. They walked on the staircase in communal...

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №126077
 29.03.2016
xxx: Yesterday I called a rejected person who made 28 errors on 3 pages in a test task. He said he was ready to challenge the result and rewrite if necessary.
XXX: We are not ready. In the middle of the day, these three leaflets went through all departments. Someone spit coffee in them, photocopies were taken from them, after lunch I personally saw how neighboring trucks roasted over them.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna