I ask nothing, but I want a lot. Just you will be okay. In the Best no longer works, and it is not so " funny". Happiness to you.

You should try to write a book without characters.
YYY: There is already. and Matan.

The child clarified:
“Mom, mom, is it true that matte words are for the uneducated?
Who is this uneducated, Grishko?
No to Dad. Daddy in the pants wears the word.
I'm going to argue with my husband, the child runs faster to the dad and cries:
“Daddy, if you want to be raised, don’t wear a belt with a blade!”! to

Don’t expect free toilets in a country that pays money for church entrance.

In one of the regions of Russia stands a unique monument of greed. It is a narrow-roads heatway TU-2 that grew into the ground in the middle of an island on a forest swamp. The story of his appearance is funny.
For a long time, a narrow railway was located in these places. In addition, there were two branches on it. One abandoned, arriving on the almost flooded land before this island. The second was sometimes used for the importation of produced seedlings. On the second branch stood a village, the inhabitants of which had a gain - they cut out of the tree spoon, circles, plates, tablespoons. It was taken to the village for 30 kilometers. In the village lived several artists (on a local basis), painted and sold products underground through some barracks. The money was transferred to the cutters, they were paid with ointments and everything went in a new circle. The management of the forest farm knew, but did not touch the cutters in exchange for orders and gifts for all sorts of inspectors.
And one day, another batch of ready-to-painted dishes arrived in the prolonged spring, when Russian settlements turn into a strip of obstacles even for the trailer. It is necessary to send plates-pounds, and tractors, as a sin, are busy at distant shops. Thou! Do we have a tractor when the rails go straight through the village? Someone at work agrees with the TU-2 engineer that he will come on Saturday and take the goods, and then go to the village and give to the ointments.
Blessed Soviet times! Simple and in something good.
The machinery on Saturday sweeps the guard of the blue depot, quietly removes the heat carriage and drows it into the forest. He himself translates the arrow - this is a frequent phenomenon in the UJD - and goes to the branch. The goods are loaded in the non-working cabin, and in addition, the locomotive is transferred 150 rubles - this is the salary of the ointment plus the return of the old debt.
150 rubles was a lot of money. Not a coat of course, but decent. The engineer had a frog. Some kind of devil with brushes 150 re for sitting on his ass in a warm bath, and he is tormented under all the winds and ears in a solarium for about the same amount a month.
After leaving the highway, he went not to the village, but home. On the way drowned in the swamp bags with lovingly cut dishes. A hundred and a half warmed their pockets and calmed their conscience.
After some time, the cutters, not waiting for money, went on the dry road to the ointments:
Where is?
What is?
Where is money?
For what?? to
for the goods!
Where is?
What where?
Where is the goods?
Conversation of the blind with the deaf. The murder did not happen, but the news that the goods were gone and the money too did not delight either one or the other.
We came to the machinery. Although from another village, but the LPG is one.
Where is?? to
I know nothing. Neither did you give me a fig, the lock stood in the bench, as
under labour law, and generally falls the department, speculated
Until he called to the OBS.
Since the Soviet Authority did not like the entrepreneurship, the cutting-cuts fell away. OBHSS could press seriously and everyone cares that people did not steal a slice, but cut with their own hands after hard work.
Mordor beats - you can, but not the way out, because the site also needs sticks, and to get a "bowl" because of such a scam - well!
Revenge was better done. One heat car in the LPG every day stood as a reserve. in the turn. People were quietly waiting.
The "assistant" will stand the TU-2 fool, conspired with another driver and he, contacting the dispatcher, the diesel breakdown. From the station was dispatched by a reserve (i.e. without wagons) TU-2 with the villain and his assistant.
The Avengers did a hard job. They rebuilt approximately a fifty-meter path from the blocked arrow on the highway to the remains of an abandoned branch. I turned the bullet with a bullet. The heat truck flew on the old road and the gun behind it was immediately closed.
Around the lock appeared men with bad mouths and various heavy tools. The thief realized that it was worth to get out of the lock and him a pipet.
Around the forests, swamps, to the nearest area, where there is at least some headquarters, 20 kilometers. He tried to contact the dispatcher, but for some reason (I did not understand from the eyewitness story) did not work out. The men started knocking on the door behind the cabin. The engineer made the only decision. He went. to forward. Where this branch leads has long been forgotten. He, rightly, reasoned this way: I will go somewhere, and if not, they will be left behind.
The speed did not exceed 10 km / h, the heat car was dragged deep into the reserve.
It was worth stopping and again showed an escort following the lock on a self-made dressing. At one stop, a helper jumped - he was not touched, but he was not released.
Not to bring anyone. The road went under the slope, the machinery was shaded: to break up and sharply brake, so that the people on
The crazy man beat and cleaned up. Well, back he will return himself and move the gun without any problems.
He gave up the gas, although the heat car threateningly crumbled on the rugged path.
At a relatively small, but still sufficient speed, the TU-2 jumped through the dam and flew to an island where the rail was no longer there, but you will not notice it in the grass. He sits right away. and intentionally. The mechanic said goodbye to his life - in these swamps, the tank armies disappeared, damn there was some heat vehicle! Dress was gone. The driver did not believe in a miraculous rescue. He walked out of the sea for several hours. When he came out to the shooter, he stumbled. The highway was not connected. The rugged half-grown path broke in fifty meters from the former arrow.
There was a thick leaf on the old roof that said that the last steam car had passed here ten years ago.
Now imagine a whalam’s donkey telling the road boss about the magic rails and the heat wheel in the mud! The chief was out. I went to place. Yes the bowl. Yes, the old road without a slide. Yes, the island was once a ride, but the rails have not been there for a long time. And as a matter of fact - not a new, but undamaged thermal train TU-2 in the middle.
The story had to be repeated to the director, the chief engineer and the assembled commission. The commission examined the gap between the branch and the arrow and concluded that the last time the road was here ten years ago.
The motorist was tortured. The entire LDL, up to the last sickle, felt it his duty to cling to him anywhere and ask How? And why? There was a version that the tractor, but why - it did not explain.
Eventually, the driver resigned and left almost to the other end.
The USSR.
The heat car was discontinued because it was impossible to pull it out of the island.
The heavy machinery itself stumbled into a crash.
Long ago there was no LPG and the rails were removed, and the depot turned into ruins.
And he stands. The same there.

A true psychologist is one who in a crowded subway car will be able to identify and get up to the place where the seat will be released first.

I saw nothing more pessimistic than the departing from the entrance "Emergency Assistance" with flashes and the song "The road to hell"Cris'a Rea, shimmering from the driver's open fork.

Hi X wife.
Hi my husband.
X How are you?
Well, I live and live...I am sitting here, I am setting up the lights from the livery.
X set up a new password.

In the UK, a driver was deprived of his licenses for driving drunk... a toy car. Moreover, he was riding the pink car of the doll Babri on his own garden plot, reports "Gazeta.ru". However, when his "wheels" were seen by the police, they immediately drafted a protocol about driving a vehicle in the state of alcoholic intoxication. The judge endorsed the law and deprived Paul Hutton of his rights for three years.

There were too many queues for beauty and intelligence, so I stood up in one where people were not. As a result, I received a lifelong reserve of stupidity, as a bonus - the ability to make the wrong decisions, and as a gift - the lack of ability to learn from mistakes.

I was given an anti-stress ball at work.
How does it help?and :)
See also: AHA
Now I want to take this ball and joke anyone!! to

There are only wicked people in power!

Moscow State Automotive Inspectorate detained participants of the rally of the Federation of motorists of Russia, who are opposed to the use of special signals by officials. This is by the radio station "Echo of Moscow".
Demonstrators, who placed blue blankets on the roofs of personal cars in protest, were stopped at the entrance to Kutuzovsky Prospectus.
The detainees were taken to the police station where they will stay for a few more hours. There were no official charges against the protesters.
c) the RBC

Collective mind of BORA, burn these menta 3 days of thick, continuous diarrhea!

Must be so:

Fuck, I’m not lucky lately... raise my luck factor, really need it!
Whoever will, Tom said:
+2 points for the exam
+20% to salary
+1 to all accounts
25% chance of getting a machine
+2 to evasion from the army -2 to the likelihood of getting a machine

Ritta: You are from which city?
Connect: Look at the INF.
Ritta: Oh, is Infa far from Moscow?
Connectivity : x

Cappuccini on children's clothes are invented for fathers to hold their children

From the news.ru news:
Moscow hoisters blocked the FAR (Russian Federation of Car Owners) action with blue cockroaches!
They stopped the column of blueberries and began to penalize car owners for (CARE!) Poorly fixed, according to GAI, blue cockroaches and forced them to shoot without giving documents!
Journalists who filmed the disgrace were fined for entering the road!

If we have more, we will kill them by number!!! Go ahead, the blue ones!

xxx: I watched a telecast today, there is another singer, Learler. The first thought "Nick Lera is busy, you can register..."

The conversation between two Icelanders: Have you heard that Eyjafjallajökull has survived?
Are you sure it’s not Hwanadalsunkur?
“Of course, Hwanadalstunkur is near the Kaulwafedlsstadyur itself, and Eyjafjallajökull is closer to Westmannahyar if you go to the side of Snajfedlsjökull.
Thank God, I have relatives living in Brunei.

I had long thought about giving a friend to dr. He is 30 years old and has everything. found on the market dendi... ppc... almost a day from the calf himself did not go away (contra 47 inches is something). so now his wife threatens to kill me, and in general says to take him along with the console, one figure he is now at home as furniture )))
The Wii is now running out :)

Leonid Slutsky, Chief Coach of CSKA:
How is Honda with the Russian? It adds not by days, but by hours. Especially delighted when Honda approached and presented in Russian: "I am a Japanese". The guys taught.