bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №110390
 08.03.2015
<xxx> In the Mean
<xxx> Tomorrow I will have guests, two familiar musicians with children
<xxx> Kids - girls twins two years old
<xxx> In this regard, he walked through the apartment and removed everything tiny and fragile from public access.
<xxx> This was basically my collection of MLP figures.
<xxx>...
So I’m 28 years old, and I’m now walking around my apartment and hiding my toy pony so that other kids can’t play with them.
<xxx> Where did I go wrong?! to

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №110389
 08.03.2015
Remember, and those who protested against the war in Vietnam were also called the "fifth column" and "enemies of the people"?
************
Well you, of course not. The United States is the bastion of democracy. Rubber bullets, plastic bullets, tear gas – yes, but call the fifth column – never. Whether it’s “agents of comi” and “enemies of society,” but that’s a very different thing.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №110388
 08.03.2015
I go once a half year.
To find a drop of meaning.
Nothing is changing,
As if it depended...

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №110387
 08.03.2015
This is called the satellite of life.

You live and he turns.

[ + 32 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №110386
 08.03.2015
Victory Day is dedicated to...

So it turned out that we know about the unique battle under Raseynaya thanks to the direct participants of those events, though, on the opposite side. In 1945, high-ranking German officers were officially captured by the United States. In fact, they were used as military advisors for a future possible war with the USSR. Something the Americans knew, something they guessed, but one of the reports, presumably Colonel General Franz Halder, just shocked the U.S. military.

On June 23, 1941, near the Lithuanian town of Raseiney, Soviet tanks entered a counter-offensive. According to the calculations of the command of the Red Army, they should have opposed no more than twenty tanks of the group "Zekendorf", the number of artillery and infantry was not taken into account at all. From the composition of the 2nd Tank Division was taken a battalion of heavy tanks KV, which had never met the Germans on the front. The task was simple - to attack the enemy in the flank and thus force him to retreat to the Dubise River. But in fact, it all turned into a tank battle, where about a hundred Germans were against 20 Soviet tanks.
In the early stages of the war, Germany did not have tanks capable of penetrating the 70-mm KV armor. Only anti-tank guns or some types of artillery were able to do this. Therefore, in the first minutes of the battle, the surprise of the German soldiers had no limits. The artillery of their Pz-35 tanks did not leave on the armor of the "Stalin monster" even wreckage, but the retaliatory shots of the KV crashed everything in its way. Only a few moments passed, and the whole field was filled with crushed German tanks, and the KV battalion was already moving through the enemy infantry, its goal was artillery. When she also mostly turned into metal, a thunderstorm was heard - the German aircraft began to hit the tanks with direct guidance. Under a barrel of shells, having lost several vehicles, the battalion managed to retreat, leaving behind a complete chaos.

The first acquaintance with Kliment Voroshilov was not pleasant for the Nazis - several dozen Pz-35s, a battery of artillery of a caliber of 150 millimeters, dozens of anti-tank guns, trucks were destroyed, and infantry losses were counted in hundreds. But the second appearance of the KV forced this car to be respected by all German commanders.

A few kilometers from the exhausted tank group "Zekendorf" were its colleagues - the Raus group. Things went much better here, there were almost no losses, the city of Raseinaya was taken, and individual clashes with the Red Army did not bring alarm. But one evening, on June 23, a tank appeared in the road's sight. Apparently, it was a modification of the tank KV - KV-2, which was equipped with a 152-mm tank haubice, but no documentary evidence of this has been preserved. If it was, and indeed he was, then it remains only to imagine what horror the tankers of the light German tanks of the Raus group, who saw him early in the morning, captured.
At first glance, the tank looked abandoned - it was a very unimportant place for the assembly. If anyone was there, then surrounding and destroying the tank in a clean field was easier for the Germans. Most likely, the Soviet crew lagged behind its squadron or broke, which means that it did not pose any danger. However, as soon as a column of German tanks and cars appeared on the road, the monster "resurrected". With the first shot, he detonated a truck with fuel, then alternately destroyed several anti-tank guns and tanks, and then again began to "squeeze" trucks with supplies. When the highway began to resemble hell, and German tanks were hardly recognized in the bush of metal, KV calmed down. There were several small wreaths and scales on his body, but no one was able to break through his armor. However, after the battle, the tank did not go further, but continued to stand still on the road, as if it could not move.

The incident at Raseynaya alarmed the German headquarters, as this clash spoke of a soon-to-be offensive of Soviet troops in the area of this highway, and the invulnerable KV looked only a snare. Understanding the danger of the situation, the leadership decided to immediately throw all available tank reserves to the site. A day later, new columns of grey German tanks appeared on the road, and with them were 88-millimeter aircraft, for which the armor of the KV was not impenetrable.

From the side, the situation seemed absurd and wild: an entire army, and against it a lonely KV, which again looked like the crew had already left it. But soon "Kliment Voroshilov" again met the guests with a rocky explosion of shells. The first suffered a 88-millimeter anti-aircraft gun, it was almost stunned by a 152-millimeter projectile. The offensive of the Soviet tankers was certain: a tank, another, another gun... But now the Germans realized that before them was not the advanced tank of the Russian offensive, but only one car with a desperate, but not broken crew inside.
The minutes of our tankers were counted, the self-abandoned tank was literally scattered. Using the numerical advantage, the Pz-35 cold-blooded surrounded the solitary KV, while the remaining 88-mm guns crushed the tank with a bunch of shells. After the 13th hit, the KV stopped moving. But even then the fascists did not dare to touch the talked tank. Only after waiting for a while and making sure that the enemy was destroyed, the German soldiers risked to approach him. But when they approached a distance of a few meters, the tank's tower suddenly turned toward them - the crew was still alive! Frightened soldiers began to run, who where, but a few grenades thrown into the cabin of the Soviet tank completed the fate of the brave Red Army soldiers.

Surprising Germans found the bodies of six brave tankers in the tank. For two days, one tank with six tankers held back a tank group and several hundred infantry soldiers! War was a war, but military feats at all times were honored by allies and enemies, so the heroic crew was buried by the Germans with military honors.

In 1965, the tankers were buried at a military cemetery near Raseiniya, the names of the three soldiers are still unknown. Personal items suggested the names of two fighters: Ershov P.E., Smirnov V.A. and only the initials of the third - S.N.A. In memory of those events near the site of the legendary battle, near the village of Dainay, there is a military memorial dedicated to the unnamed Red Army.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №110385
 08.03.2015
I want a rich, intelligent, beautiful man, and necessarily generous, and to drive me on a beautiful big car, and to always and in everything agree with me, and to spend time only with me, and not to look at others, to breathe by me, and every day in our beautiful large and bright house smelled fresh flowers!

What are you for him?

The letter.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №110384
 08.03.2015
RayZ: Puppis, is it a cheque? Have you thought about what to give your wife on March 8?
I’ll give her sex! And don’t say anything, after 35 it is no longer a fig or a banal thing.
RayZ: I hope with a bandit on a member?
Rolling: Hey Bambi, you still remember the unforgettable chips of youth!

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №110383
 08.03.2015
I was on the bus to work. The mood is good, the sun shines, but the people are cloudy.
A woman and her daughter are sitting through the passage. Further their dialogue:
D is Mom, buy a plan.
M is I’ll be 6 years old, I’ll buy it.
D: But Christine’s parents bought.
M: Christine was six years old when she was bought.
D: How much is she now?
M is nine.
D: So they don’t buy a plan?
M: Why does she have another plan? She already has it.
Buy me a plan!
It will be six years, I will buy it.
D: But I want to!
M: I want to go to the sea.
After this phrase, the people in the bus were noticeably amused.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №110382
 08.03.2015
Each person is personally responsible for his thoughts and actions. This is our reality. It is only available to the best of us.
Don’t worry, he’s always with you. Feel it in you, not look somewhere and you will be happy.

It is your reality in which you live. In mine, for example, no God, Krishna, Odin exists at all. And your cockroaches are your property. Do not spread to everyone.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №110381
 08.03.2015
He said he was lambersexual, but turned out to be an ordinary wooden man.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №110380
 08.03.2015
Do not invent, and count the expenses for 3 years ahead with inflation of 4%, as in the forecast of the Ministry of Economic Development. Why do you lack money, how do you need twice as much?And they wept after a year.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №110379
 08.03.2015
We lie on the bed with a guy, both tired, dumb. And then he suddenly asks:
Do you want to know what it’s like to live on Jupiter?
... Well let it go.
And then his mouth rolls over and falls on me with all the weight. I have to say it’s stupid to live on Jupiter.

[ + 26 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №110378
 08.03.2015
She told me how she was bothered with cats, all she had from the street, each with her wounds, how she treated them and how much money is spent on it. On my direct question to give birth to children, which is in principle natural

Logic in action. I could understand the proposal to buy a healthy kitten if you need a cat, or to help orphans in the orphanage if you want to save someone. But what is the relationship between cats/children who are already there, who suffer and need help, and children who are not born and therefore experience no suffering or need? To give birth to an unwanted child by a single mother, to be condemned to poverty and suffering, and then to save? The human logic works.

[ + 29 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №110377
 08.03.2015
fLipe: Pathologists are doctors who look at logs

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №110376
 08.03.2015
A long time ago I signed up for an online store. A couple of years later, the store's management changed, he began to openly obsessively spam. Within half an hour I received three letters in the style of "You are sure that you no longer want to receive our wonderful newsletter? Exactly sure? Did you think well?" I am waiting for the fourth with the question "How are you not ashamed?"...

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №110375
 08.03.2015
In fact, Savchenko asked for fruit pures and juices.Variant "smuzi" was spoken by the Rash Tudey agency. Since it is still not "Russia today", namely "Rasha Tudey", then "Pure" Simonian, who knows all about cooking, has replaced her usual "smuzi".

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №110374
 08.03.2015
No... What was previously considered to be a bad tone in photography (''i on the background''i, i.e. Selfies are incredibly fashionable and cool.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №110373
 08.03.2015
About "Gagarine flew into space and saw no God":
He was a military man and gave a signature on non-disclosure"
Before the airplanes appeared, they said that B-G was in the sky, not in space. He participates in a witness protection program and moves every time.

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №110372
 08.03.2015
XY: She made such a salad that when we ate, even the neighbors went out on the balcony to smoke.

[ + 25 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №110371
 08.03.2015
Foreigners have an interesting idea about Russia and our history. I drive a foreign colleague to Moscow, we get to the monument to Yuri Dolgorukom. Typical such an ancient Russian warrior: a bulb helmet, an armor, a sword... A foreigner, showing with his finger:
and Stalin?

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