“I’m not fat at all, Sasha tells me I have a perfect figure.
- Olya, he is a mathematician, for him the perfect figure is SHAR!

The truth of life: after the light is suddenly turned off in the house, in complete silence, the mat is first delivered from the room where the desktop PC stands, and then the vicious laughter, from the person who used the laptop.

You are admin. You have an admin jokes :)

All countries cut mat from the South Park and only in Russia - Vladimir Putin.

Brother gave up on the rights, category VC. And he said that nothing is so respectful on the road as a camel with a triangle "U" on the rear glass.

A Russian-language employer for the sake of the buffer writes:
Smotri, oshibka tam, tam and tam.
This is "exactly" I forget about changing the layout and I miss a little. The result is "nuxyj".
The client thought long and wrote:
- Ladno, pust' ostaetsa.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
YYY: Agah, the attacker of the South-Butov team for cell phones.

I sat in a line at the clinic to the therapist. Listened to the outrageous discussion of two grandmothers of 70 years old, how qualitatively and promptly Dr. House treats and what a terrible hurt we have =)))

I am standing at the bus stop today. There is a cafe on the road. There are big letters on the roof of the house. The coffee is called Magnolia. There are schoolgirls nearby. Class of 10-11. One phrase killed the drinker.
You are ppc! What kind of coffee they called! Not Magnolia but Mongolia. A sign for the whole house!

xxx (23:40:03 8/04/2011)
I confused two theorems, reduced them to one.

xxx (23:40:06 8/04/2011)
Almost proved it!

xxx (23:40:10 8/04/2011)
Prelude to...El

xxx (23:40:24 8/04/2011)
I myself, honestly, too

I go to the subway, I see the slogan of beer advertising in large letters: "To be in the crowd, but not to be a crowd", and from the bottom some smart man with a pen signed: "Wodka-to be in shit, but not to be a shit."

My dad is schizophrenic, but he is good people.

Who talked about flowers?
I am a foreign student, I live only by scholarships and sub-works and for me even 250p is already money.
So, yesterday I went to the store to buy a rose to a girl... Five minutes later I went out there with a rose in a blanket and with the feeling that I was washed; three arrogant bodies that worked there diligently broadened on a bouquet and ascertained that I was not conducting, they struck me as they could and all this with sweet smiles.
A very romantic idea of the flowers - the higher the price, the stronger the feelings... and judging by their sincere enthusiastic whisper, especially from the dumb buffalo, who came there half an hour ago on the "cherochi" and bought 25 roses, although at the same time with difficulty binding four words in a sentence.
I wanted to give girls flowers... instead of romance, divorce and commerce.
I’m sorry, but I think many will agree.

From the social network:

I see links on the forums every day:
"From True Love 7 Years 5 Months..."
"I have been looking at it for 33 years..."
What if everyone started to tell the truth?

"I fattened his brain 22 years and 5 months"
"Suke you when you start bringing money 8 years 4 months 17 days" and
"Suka, I would take you, but I love the cold 4 years 12 days and 5 hours"

I am good on Saturdays.
Today is Friday!
This is the stupid hole.

and Tanko:
Peter is strange.
The City of Hipsters and Intellectuals
Today the bomz said to another at the wash: "The will not to step!"

We sit on a pair led by the dean. In the audience there is a small garment, sometimes papers fly and crash into someone's neck, the dean doesn't mind, noise isn't very much. But here the garbage begins to grow, the pad is soft - you can look :)
Dean so quietly: "Well guys, don’t make noise, and then I’ll remove..."(from the audience, type). Everyone ignores the comment.
And then he issued: "With a tight shift, scuco!"
Silence of O

I read intranet horror stories about killing videos, mp3 files from which people start bloody vomiting and other feces from the same series. Dialogue with Mom:
I: - In short, there is a video, when people look at which they tear their eyes out O_O
Mom (unimaginable indifferential intonation): - Oh, if you find, drop me the link, I will show the guys at work.

Me: Treasure Hunter Darren McCall gathers an archaeological expedition into the jungle, in search of a legendary artifact - a precious knob buried in the cemetery of the ancients. By invading the sacred land, aliens awaken a bloodthirsty creature that has been sleeping in its depths for thousands of years. The monster begins a merciless hunt for people.
to go?

my love: aaaa, I thought it was news)) until I saw the question))) upload

We talked about children at work.
I: Wolf, you don’t even know what children are.
Wolf: Why can’t I imagine, I even saw them.