What kind of girl is this, will you introduce me?
It is me, the fool!
It is humor, idiot!

The story was told by a friend (it has a stunning charming appearance, according to the passport - 21 years, looks at 20). So, she sits somehow in a cafe, not in the mood, drinks coffee. At the table sits "picapper", a man under forty, begins the conversation:
M: You know, girl, you are so beautiful today, I am professionally engaged in astrology, in which year you were born?
A friend wants to send him, but politeness does not allow him.
You have such eyes! Maybe the Year of the Dragon?? to
Q: Yes, in the Year of the Dragon
M: (with the appearance of a doctor of astrological sciences, quickly counting in mind) Tam-taram!!! You are 33 years old :D

I have never received such compliments.

A friend who moved to Canada as a child and, accordingly, grew up abroad sends a message:

"Take it up now! Now I decided to remember my childhood and watched Winnie the Pooh Russian... and fucking in shock! They, Maschk, you know... they’re honey from bees! They stole! Right in the mule! Then they came to the rabbit and ate it all. All of it! And in the hole! ;) What did I do when I was a child?"

O_O

Diabolical: Rumor, and Michai che, with Anka is all?
Mario: Uhu)))
Diabolical by Huiase. When did they run away? O_O
by Mario: Yesterday
Diabolical is fun. So, who was in his cabin for that? And I saw him last night, he was with a findiel under the eye.
Mario: Yesterday was history. You know that joke.
Diabolical: Let’s get more detailed)
We are waiting for Irene. And Michas is so serious, says "I’ll tell you a story". Everyone is listening, listening to all ears.
Mario: He is starting.
Mario: A friend told me that he knew one family (father and daughter) of foresters. Then my father left the house and did not come back. But half a year later, he knocked on the door and asked him to eat. She was terrified and locked the door. In the morning, she went to her father and asked for advice. He told her that she would let him into the house, give him food... and then cross him from the back. She did so. The father came, she let him in, served dinner. They sat down at the table, but she accidentally fell a fork. She leaned to lift it and saw that her father had a copper instead of legs.

Mario: He continues... "The daughter asked her father, ‘Daddy, are you fucking?’"
Mario: And here Michai is sharply as grumpy as it is: "Yes!".
Mario: Well, Anka immediately fainted and Stas was clean on the machine like a jerk in the harry! That is how it all happened.
Diabolical: And I knew he would find out with his jokes someday.

Question from the Microsoft test:
Where do you buy the sausage?
1) In the cabbage shop. It is fresh and delicious there.
2) I download a virtual sausage cut from torrents. It is free there.
3) The man who takes her out of the sausage factory. What did he wear under his shirt? He is washing. Probably though.
I am a man from the previous answer.

I need to add such questions:
"Do you buy sausages separately for each family member?"
"Do you cut a sausage with a knife recommended by the sausage manufacturer?"
Do you like when after 2 years your favorite sausage stopped being produced, and to cut a new sausage, you need to buy a new knife?

I am just fine! Tifou Tifou Tifou. May everyone be well!

The study found that 90% of visitors to www.mozilla.org use Internet Explorer.

by felix812
I came for an interview. The young girl went to the cacao. 22 on the doorway is a phone as usual with an internal number. The electricity there the disk machine stood))) and this girl removes the pipe and does not spin the disk and just there the finger inserts waits, then inserts the number in the track and waits again))) stands dumb and that does not work :rofl:

Security : What?! to
Student: An autonomous firefighter eats, prevents sleep.
A: I will take a picture of the ladder. Why are you in one shoe?
C: We tried to get her out of there.
O : and?
C: The top is stuck in the ceiling.
Yes, they are mutants.

I worked in a company that was engaged in the assembly and service of express payment terminals. And then one day one terminal was hanging on the service, and the tachskrin did not want to work with him. They gathered, began to check. And came to mind a brilliant idea, connected the monitor to the computer, on which was installed IL-2 strike aircraft :-) Who played, he will understand :-) That is, when you fly, you mean, over Belin and straight hands steered you turn, the fingers of each button you use - 100 percent realism :-))) The work stood up for a week, all the employees of the company built in a row on the airplane to fly" :-) In the first rows stood the head of the office, with the words "Yes, they went into the ass these customers, I still did not bomb the station" :-)

This is all because of my lack of sleep...

Dmitry ‎(20:01):
The stupid. You are always beautiful. What are you wearing?

Nathaniel ‎(20:01):
Mother's Shirt
Gipsy

to this:
eyeyeye... guys can get enough to concentrate on light snow and -5??? As it is spring... let those on +10 and the sun... or winter is tired already =)
Everyone has a good mood and a good day ;)
__________________________________________________________________________
Oh yeah... no one!! to
Peter is angry!! to

xxh: yesterday I got to see hentai one, which I was advised for a long time... more than ten minutes could not watch))
Is it all so cruel?
xxx: It was very cruel when during the sex scene at the workplace of a beautiful detective and his secretary, the girl in the most responsible moment through the walls issued: I... ah.. of course.. ah... I do not complain.. ah... in this way... ah... But I would like... at least once... ah... to get a prize... naaaalichnymiiyiyiyiyiyiyiyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!
Tagged with: rofl

Until Kasper knew he was a good man, he killed.

(KVN of )

Here I was always surprised: we gay so fight for equal civil rights with the sex-majority - to get married there, children allowed to adopt, and so on... And what about the sacred right of every man - to protect his homeland? Why are they not standing with pickets at the military commissions, demanding to end discrimination and take them into the army on an equal footing with heterosexual youths?
___________________________________
Because they are fucking!
(Your own K.O.)

A friend revealed that the cat was infected under the tree.
Without any comments.

In response to:
We have two stripes and I’m pleased! Support those who are ready for it and await such a turn!"
------------
Did the sergeant? and :)

I answer a question in one social network (in general, people, not friends) and come across this:
The evening. My husband and I miss it. How will you diversify our range?
A bunch of all kinds of posts with ohas, bookacams, drinks and so on.
He responds at the end of a brutal type:
I’ll take you to the morgue and show you a couple of girls who also wrote with Caps Lock and they were bored the evening too.
I slipped under the chair of laughter.

On torrent: Funny guys [Colored version] (1934)
Commentary : Thank you! I’ll wait for 3D.