The Russians in the corridor are planted separately because we are sick for the bull, not the matador.

Eight years ago, we had a furry cat, named Musya. The name of the cat was given by the daughter, the cat was deeply poffed on the name. And the cat is no longer that, but the story alone I remember strongly.

Moussa liked to sleep in the refrigerator that stood in the hallway. And he liked to eat at night, for which he jumped out of the refrigerator and, cuddling his nails, went to the kitchen.

That day I went to bed a little later than usual, like watching a movie, I don’t remember. And here, I lie down, dive into sleep, gradually fall asleep. I hear the noisy newspapers on the refrigerator, the light sound of the cat’s legs hitting the floor, the cuddling of the nails, the sound of which typically changes along the way to the kitchen. I think I had to eat again at night. Here the dream disappears. And this is why: for a couple of months in the summer, my wife, daughter and cat went to the village and there is no living soul in the apartment besides me.

To say that the dream flew away from me in an instant is to say nothing. I woke up immediately and was covered by the cold afterwards. A silence surrounded by the beating of my heart.

I am an intelligent adult with a physical and mathematical mindset. I don't believe in any mysticism, I was loudly outraged in my head.

I dreamed of all this! I continued, nervously pressing my fingers, trying not to move under the sweat-moist blanket.

“Well, no one,” I will say when I go into the kitchen and turn on the light, “I rehearsed a speech and laughed humbly.

It lasted 120 to 240 seconds. I did not count.

Then he got up. Turn on the light. Turn on the light in the hallway. I walked into the kitchen, switching on the lights. He nodded his head, spared his dignity and did not laugh at himself.

There was nobody. No cat, no domestic, no foreign gremlins, nothing.

He slept again. Since he was no longer asleep, he turned on the phone a book and began to read, sometimes listening to the silence of the night.

Yesterday, the excellent weather in St. Petersburg drove us out of the house for a walk along the shore. A couple of young and happy people decided to use self-catchering. The girl tried to remove a heavy car from her leg, but she didn't, she looked at her companion with hope, and the winged one, helped her in this struggle.Later the girl could not come down from the brow, our hero came to help again...I was irritated - the girl caused the impression of some handless disruption. I shared this with my wife, and she replied that the girl probably did it specifically to make her companion feel like a hero.

I remembered myself in those years... Oh, where were you when you were young?

The soul requires the continuation of the banquet, but the body must pay.

On the neighboring street in a small courtyard, a shale under the open sky, on the curtain a sign: "Delicious shale." Two tables under the tent. There is no one in the shale, only a young Armenian stands at the mangal.
“Come, dear, look, the prices are here, the shale is all kinds of.
I look at prices. The Armenian stared at me.
Why are you so sad?
and nothing. Everything is OK, thank you.
My wife is in trouble, right?
not married.
I mean, with a girl. Wife, bride, girlfriend – what’s the difference? I look in the eyes. Worried eyes are a problem with money. Tired eyes are a problem at work. Sad eyes are a woman’s problem.

What if I was wearing dark glasses?

I have an eye problem, yes. In such a dark day, what dark glasses, dear?

He laughs. The right tooth is missing.

Take a pork, my dear. Baraka would have suggested, but the baraka has seen a lot in this life. Don’t take a barrel, take a pig, don’t think.

Give me a pig. Is there onion?

Is it like without onions? I put more. Here is a good strawberries, look: one meat, no strawberries, soft - would eat, but money is needed.

I approve of. The Armenian hides the bills in the pockets of the fork and puts the shale on the mangal.

“Don’t be upset about the girl,” he says. You have to be happy about the girl.

On a single-use plate he puts a bowl of marinated onions, presses ketchup from a bottle next to him, and himself explains at this time the thought:

Do you know what my grandfather said? Women are like a field. If you plant little, it will grow little. If you sow a lot, it will grow a lot. Nothing grew – maybe nothing sowed?

I sat, I said.

A lot of seeds? The voice is pretended to be harsh.

Good thing, I regret it.

So the field is just stones, says the Armenian. Every good thing should come back to man. Do you love her? Do you give gifts, say words, do help? I am waiting for my kiwi. And what is she?

I shake my shoulders.

It’s all wrong, he shakes his hand. “Look, you came to me, you gave me money, I’m making you a shale. An honest exchange, right? If I take money and I don’t make a scam, what kind of scammer am I? Will you give me money again?

That is money, I say. Money is not the main thing in relationships.

So I didn’t promise you to give birth to an inheritor, only to make a shale! Armenians shake their hands. Who is talking about money? Money is nonsense! So, there’s something to buy! I am talking about you. You give yourself. What do you get back?

Relationships are a little more complicated than with a shuffle.

Nothing is more complicated. You think, “People are complex, people are different.” Psychology and approach. It has to be simple with people. I gave a lot, I got a lot. If you give and don’t get, why give again?

What if otherwise?

The Armenian turns the shampoo on the mangal.

If you walk in a shoe and the shoe is shaking, what does it mean? The size is not yours. The shoe is not yours. Take, put beyond the threshold - whoever fits, will take, thank you will say. You will buy another shoe, right? If a woman doesn’t love you, what does it mean?

At the threshold?

Why the threshold? A man can’t be over the threshold, it’s not a shoe. You get up, you go away, you look in the mirror, dear?

It happens.

You go out and see a lot of women.

of course.

You see yourself in the mirror, yes. You are alone and there are many women around you. I have to find my own. Look, he is on the street, he is. Come and ask – suddenly yours?

I will smile. The Armenian man straight up and strikes the girl’s hand:

The girl! The girl! Come and meet the young man. Shakes at the institution!

The girl on the move shows him the middle finger. The Armenian nodded his head, laughing said:

An uncultured girl. Do not need such.

No need of any.

and e! I'll tell you like a shale: you can live a whole life without a shale, and nothing will happen. Without a woman cannot.

Remove the shampoo from the mangal and put it on a plate.

But don’t give up on the shake as well. In a couple of days, the barrel will be fresh - you will lick your fingers, enter. What a good shit, I will always tell you. You will find a good woman. Be careful, it is hot! A pleasant appetite.

Here’s where else could I get a psychotherapy session at the price of a shale, plus a free shale? The pork is soft, no veins, one meat, and a lot of onions.

I go after tomorrow.

But tomorrow the general course in the country will change dramatically, and the same people from the same stands and screens with the same passion and conviction will sing completely different songs tomorrow.

The 11th class. Exam in Biology. (After the choice of which)

The biologist came overwhelmed and at the beginning of the exam dropped, leaving the teacher under the control of OBŽ.

I have two questions on the ticket. The first I do not remember, and the second "use of microorganisms in the people's economy". Well, I pretended, ready to answer without preparation. The man says, wait.

I wait. There is no biological teacher. He says, go and answer. I fit. I tell you how to use yeast for the production of самогоon. (My grandfather was able to do that.) All the technology was told. He did not even hear about the production of biogas from fertilizer. Go to Five...

The official said that electricity prices in Russia are on average 30–50% lower than economically justified.
How many times the average salary in Russia is below the economically justified, he modestly silenced.

It was 6 years ago. I met a guy on the internet, agreed to meet after work. He was late for 15 minutes, I was hungry and very angry.

I look at the sides and see a two-foot bearded man approaching me, wearing glasses, a huge shirt and with a leather bag across his shoulder. I strained a little, and he approached me and said:

- Go sooner, or there are so many people, to kill their hunting!

My legs immediately became cotton, I was so scared that for the first time in my life I had the thought of just turning and leaving.

Why did I go with him? It was very simple, I wanted to eat.)

When we went up the ladder, he took off his glasses and hid them in his bag, and when I asked him about his vision, he replied that he was wearing them just “for the point.”

I wanted to run for the second time, but we got up. Later he admitted to me that he was so nervous that he decided to behave strangely to remember :)

We came to the cafe, I hardly listened to him because I had already buried that date. Then I began to look at him somehow, and he is nothing like that, no longer like a maniac, his eyes are beautiful, cheerful.

There was a conversation, we talked for two hours, we walked around the houses if not a couple, then good friends.

On a second date, he brought me a nest. It’s not a joke, I was looking for a rekvizit for the filming of advertisements, and in all the stores and theaters my question caused a wild whistle (which is understandable, by the way), and naturally nothing was found.

And there he called. I complained to him that there was such a trouble, and he asked to wait a little. An hour later, I had a picture of a nest wrapped out of seed (he had a rabbit at home). I didn’t believe it until he brought me a box with him. And then I realized I wanted to see what happened next.)

After two weeks we started living together, so we still live together - fun and in love :)

They beat the drums of war to silence the bell of empty pots!

When you take one step from love to hatred, take that step back.

Specifics of the Aitish logic

We got a new installation and software to test it. Program with a limited number of launches. Excessive - cuts out and does not start again. Buy the full paid version. And to buy yet early, we check if this very inexpensive thing suits us. Therefore, the computer with the software dumb does not turn off at all.
And the software folders, among other things, are continuously filled with new and new, very large results files. The program is already slowing down. The whole group is looking for ways to delete unnecessary files. without a result. There is no “remove” button. There is “processing.” There was no “removing.” There are "save", "save as", there are all sorts of others, but one and close to "delete". Standard key combinations do not work at all.
Finally, our patience ends and we contact the developers by phone. A tired or slightly sleepy man hears the claims, and with a slight irritation, slowly, like children, begins to explain. In the voice there is a disappointment in stupid, not understanding elementary, customers.
Open the “Results” folder. Opened up? Choose a file to delete. have chosen? “Click” on him. Separated by? Now press the “Save” button. Stumbled on? The program opens a window asking you “Save: Yes or No?” You choose “No.”

One girl went to Hermitage, saw pictures of naked women and then became a prostitute.

I don't know if I ride with a sexually mature child like this, but my mother taught me once and for all to drag money out of the house.. I remember I was 12 years old and I made friends with one guy, he was an orphan, lived with an adult sister who used drugs and this is how we walked with him and how this conversation came I don't remember, but I said that at home on the refrigerator is 500 rubles, he convinced me to steal them, what I saved and did, the legend for parents was this: I was met by the elderly on the street and under the threat of execution, forced to bring them 500 rubles. Mother in the evening naturally understood everything, but the sight did not give, said what called the police and really called, the staff came, she spoke to them and they told me to sit down and write a description of "the robbers", I do not remember at what moment, but I broke and told everything to my mom and the police and there happened the unexpected, the staff put on me real bracelets, mother began to tell them the type do not put him in jail, he is small yet, but they were relentless and put me in the patrol UAZik, in this cono for 2 seats, clogged the door. I sat down and imagined that I would be sitting in jail now and crying quietly. The police officer who was talking with my mother apparently sat in the car, because the door was blown and we went, we rode around the house and went to the entrance, but in the sensations, the time lasted for an eternity and we were driving for not less than an hour... In general, when the police officer opened the door and I saw my mother at the entrance, I was just upset, apologized to my mother and why then to the police, since "as my grandmother whispered," no penny from the house has ever disappeared and now there is no other thought to take. This is a small story...

My sister told me yesterday that I would never get rich. Because I: ate a child’s bitten coatlet; made great shorts from short jeans; I drove to the mouth of Moscow for some terrible warehouses on an internet order, because they have a delivery of 550 rubles.

My sister said that I have the psychology of a poor man, that subconsciously I enjoy such a life. And that Big Money loves those who really want them, not those who are accustomed to doing without them.

If you have three hundred thousand for a vacation, will you fly in business class?

No why? I’m better for that money.

and VOOT. To become a millionaire, you need to feel like a millionaire. Within the inside.

Do you feel?

“Not very much yet,” said the sister. - Only I will go to live wider: throw out the socks, take a taxi to the bakery, so as soon as intentionally - then my husband will be placed in quarantine, then the car broke. A magical circle!

Putin instructed officials to deal with the rise in housing prices in Russia after they successfully dealt with the prices of products and the indexation of pensions for working pensioners.

A memoir about the Thai toilet.

A tour of the Golden Ring of Russia came to some male monastery. I checked everything, I had to go to the toilet. The master pointed to the staircase down, saying there you will find everything. The ladies went down and saw two doors with the signs “B” and “C”. A lively discussion began - where to go? Some ladies insisted that they need to be in "B", but I just don't understand why so rude? Other girls have quite admitted that they are “C,” but again, why so ignorant, though honest? The question remains open: where do men go if both doors are female?

The conflict was resolved by the descending obedient, explaining that the inscriptions mean Brothers and Sisters.

Is it normal for young girls like us to be under forty?

So many ropes don’t fall.

Today I went for lunch with a colleague who came back from the United States. He told me a story that I can’t help but share.

further from his face.

I met a guy there who was the head of a small company that was developing some GPS applications for different phone platforms. And this guy just killed me with his story... his company was small, but quite successful. And then one day at the corporation one of the employees began to rub everyone that he is in a society that believes that the earth is flat and that science is lying to everyone... even a reference to a special wiki gave, and boasted that his point of view is respected by everyone and generally their 10% of such believers and each day they are getting more.

The boss listened to it and quickly fired him. The guy immediately to the court, said they fired him for professing a different faith and all that... And the boss through the lawyer explains that their firm is directly related to the development of the latest and innovative technologies GPS, cartography and other systems, which involve spherical earth, and he with his statement questions his qualification in this field of development and so he was fired, so that the company does not lose his face and his competence before global customers.

The trial this guy with flat ground lost, and the boss said he would not tolerate such idiots at his firm :)

This is what I understand “fighting darkness” :)

Good news and education :)