I go to the garbage dump. Looking around a tank, a guy mistakes half-gopnically with crazy eyes and turns some armor in his hands. Carefully looking at me and asking: "Small things will not be found?" A little shake, I give out: "Where do I have the little things, only for the washing went out..." and sweet so, confidently, I smile. and pause. In the eyes of the guy appears an unhealthy light and he gives out: "What is your name? Could you leave a number?"
No one has met me yet...

April 1 comes from a familiar SMS:
I am pregnant, what should I do?
until the 2nd of April :)

The leading seller stands on the stairs with ice cream, we hear further with a standing stand, here the hop fits and there is such a dialogue:
Give me three rubles.
Go to: Go to;
Hop long ftikaet stands, then the genius phrase -
Give me the ice cream!
The curtain.

I came up with a new reality show "Stay Alive" with deputies in the lead role:
Officials with their families without any kind of cars settle in the Soviet Union and get a subsistence minimum. The goal is to live for a month.

Scandals, intrigues, cannibalism, suicide attempts and all this you will see in the new reality show on TNT. Do not miss!

Che: And really, why are you so in a hurry to offer her a date?

Well, I’m just tired of walking around, so there’s no reason for her to think I’m just joking with her.

Che: and you chose April 1 to offer her a date)) genius)))) :DDD

She is: Listen I have a question. Why do men not stand up during sex? :D
He: Well, it’s not about us.

They did it! They added all the buttons we asked for.

I don’t understand why in Japan, robots dance, play violin and talk silently, while Japanese people are running around the nuclear plant and trying to pour it out with water?
Porcupine: Robots have better trade unions

Today, before the exam, we are sitting with the group members. Someone says “I want to eat, drink and fuck” and went to give up!After a while he goes out and says “Now I want to eat and drink!”and "

Another 10 years of effective management of our power - and population census
Replace the call.

A colleague today told - he leads the little boy to the garden, a boy of 6 years, the one to her: "Mom, once the snow comes again and the spring does not come, can I write a letter to Santa again?"

It is sad, but:
of 1612. Minin and Požarsky expel Poles from the Kremlin
of 1812. Kutuzov and Alexander I expel Napoleon from Russia
2012 year. Putin and Medvedev, sitting in the Kremlin, expel Russian people from Russia

Foreigners will learn Russian language

I love my work.
Among the congratulatory cards presented to me by students, my favorite is received on my birthday in the first year of work:
“Dear broker! “We’re going to take you, Madam your mother!”

Growing long nails.

31.03.2011 10:20:24, redbilberry
And Kisa from the morning scared my nails.
31.03.2011 10:20:39, Doom
I have dried up since evening.

Oh Dybal, I bought a sticker on the system with Tux, and decided that in the middle of the touchpad on the notebook he would look great, what a Dybal...
No, I must admit that it still looks beautiful.

Don’t open the window at night, I’ll freeze.
Hide yourself and don’t freeze.
M: So you take my blanket from me.
Q: Do I pick up every night?
I’m more likely to wake up in the morning with another grandmother than under a blanket.

The case on radio:
DJI: "Today is a beautiful weather! Rain with storm! So let’s go out and breathe nitrogen!

I love gin tonic with starburst-type chewing chemical sweets. Yesterday I took two cans of 0.5 and candy four packs ^^
Blowing the rainbow?

What about the Moscow Metro?
ThomasXIII: You know, after I went to the lyceum for 5 years on the same bus that the whole village was trying to go to work to the center, I realized that there was no pressure in the Moscow metro. They just trumble badly in the wagon.

from ZH:
by Elena: 1. To bind the serpent with his legs and wings.
2nd A serpent’s mouth.
Three Draw the snake to the end.

I was looking for a toy scheme, if anything.