bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №124636
 19.02.2016
Alexander, [05.02.16 17:05]
There is such a book "how not to try to kill people at work"?

Alexander, [05.02.16 17:05]
Or not trying to kill.

maxud, [05.02.16 17:09]
There is a small brochure.

maxud, [05.02.16 17:09]
There is one proposal

maxud, [05.02.16 17:09]
"Change the work"

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №124635
 19.02.2016
Venus is the only planet that rotates around its axis not in the same direction as others... It is completely hidden by clouds of sulfuric acid... And at the same time it has no satellites at all...

Uranium is more. At the same time, it is also "on the side rotates" (inclination of the axis 98 degrees). The Greeks did not know.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №124634
 19.02.2016
At the meeting of the graduates, everyone sat down at the table, nobody especially communicates. It has been 15 years. Many already have two children.

To make me laugh and laugh, I ask:

Have you lost your virginity? and :)

Everyone laughed, except for one humble woman who still has no husband. Thro the meeting she stood down.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №124633
 19.02.2016
Ustas, 9:52:01
NASA uses Unreal Engine 4 to create a virtual simulator of Mars

Data_Link, 9:52:09
Doom 4?

Ustas, 9:52:10
Doom 4?

$†@rg@zeR, 9:53:00
Doom 4

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №124632
 19.02.2016
I read the article about unwanted gifts on February 23, I discussed with my husband:
I: I think that a grandmother in a batch is a strange gift. You don’t give Angelina Jolie something, but yourself. He has had sex with her hundreds of times. Give yourself a gift.
Man: Well, on the other hand, who rejects such gifts?
I: Well that is yes. Anyway, some kind of stuff. I give you a shirt with a shirt - I give it to you completely, not so that once I wore it and all, give it back.
Husband: In general, yes, I get to wear a cloth - all, you are my property. I want to fuck you, I want to wash you. I want you to wash the floor, and I will fuck you at this time.
I: And it’s all in the batch!
Then I got tired, I passed on. With the same bandit. Sold on aircraft.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №124631
 19.02.2016
<igles> Ehe =/ I have a story. I took home a new procedure to read the criticism of incidents, left yesterday on the chair, without reading. I woke up and the cat was on the procedure. Even animals do not like the innovation of timid.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №124630
 19.02.2016
I met her interestingly :)
She wanted to knock me with a bottle on my head from the back as I mixed the tar for the charlotte :)

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №124629
 19.02.2016
RPC published a video of Patriarch Kirill's trip to Antarctica
2 th th. In the near future, the Orthodox penguins will hold a referendum on joining Russia, and the GDP will argue about the sacredness of Antarctica for the Russian man.
1st The film will be "Antarctica: Return to Homeland".

[ + 13 - ] Comment quote №124628
 19.02.2016
We don’t have censorship, we know what the media is doing.

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №124627
 19.02.2016
Oleg Dorman said:
I was a student of Semen Lungin Lvovich. One day we sat in his kitchen and wrote the script. At this time came his wife, Liliane Lungin, who translated from Swedish Baby and Carlson, and who worked on another translation in the room.
“Boys,” she said sadly, “I have a hero walking around the airport and holding a hamburger in his hand. I do not know what it is.
“It looks like a Macintosh,” said Lungin, “the coat is probably something.
“Well,” Liliane rejoiced, “I’ll write that he threw him through his hand.
A few minutes later, she came back and said with a dead voice:
He ate him.

[ + 33 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №124626
 19.02.2016
The news that Medvedev has discovered that he can access the site Rutracker despite its blocking. This gives us a full picture of the daytime of our prime minister.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №124625
 19.02.2016
>> Brand - browsers

Her name is Vrother, I’ve already found out. The Wrother.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №124624
 19.02.2016
xx
Why do demons get angry when you call them out for no reason? Are they not interested in being here and tormenting anyone?

xy
Because the caller cannot learn that at the end of the word "do" there is a soft sign, and at the end of the word "do" - no.

[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №124623
 19.02.2016
What you understand in 1C of Ohuena is 5 minutes of SAP, 10 minutes of acapta, or 8 minutes of directum.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №124622
 19.02.2016
Are you going crazy again?
YYY: The style!
XXX is...
Let’s go out of Umeå!
Zzzz I am sorry!
YYY: For what?? to
XXX: That you sing to me!

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №124621
 19.02.2016
Do you need backs?
Yyy : of course! I have no rubles.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №124620
 19.02.2016
xxx : link to today’s lecture on Machine Learning: <link>
YYY (bow)
ZZZ: a mixture of capoeira and brake
Sorry, I am not in that chat.
XXX: so these lectures have not yet been characterized

[ + 25 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №124619
 19.02.2016
The governor of the Saratov region, Valery Radaev, proposed to the management of the local plant of SEPO, which produces mainly refrigerators, to set up the production of smartphones iPhone 7.
YYY: What's the difference really
YYY: Have we re-profiled tank tanks?
From the refrigerator to the iPhone.
XXX: The Party orders – they can!
YYY: Dada
XXX: It will be the largest smartphone in the world, by the way.
XXX: And with a freezer camera instead of a photo camera!
YYY: The coolest smartphone ever
The rear wall is warm.
YYY: Yes, this is the problem with the sixth.
YYY: Just keep it right.
YYY: According to the manufacturer's recommendations

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №124618
 19.02.2016
The Saratov refrigerator plant will produce iPhones
SSS:...blah, this is not a fake.
Aaa: iPhones will be the size of a refrigerator and powered by the network
BBB: But they will be able to hide from a nuclear explosion!

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №124617
 19.02.2016
My nephews brought Jack Russell a girl. So this momsel was mastered by them, began to run around the apartment in search of a game. I found. The Cat. The cat was important, royally walking across the floor. His royal testicles were significantly rolled from side to side. Until it happened. Now the cat lives in cabinets like a ninja, because the little lady was very interested in this part of the cat's body. She runs after him and gets enough for the pumpkins. Why is he so upset and doesn’t play?

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