If God wanted to make man circumcised, He would have created.

Death threat
In the restaurant of the House of the Actor one night at midnight there was a terrible fight: against a dozen overtaken everyday people stood... one person. But this man was the world champion, the great Soviet boxer of the 1960s Valery.
by Popenchenko. Therefore, the attackers flew away from him with a wind like kegls. And suddenly from a distant table arose the artist of the Taganka Theatre Ramses
Jabralov is thin, small, completely defenseless. Actually
Ramses was not going to take part in the fight: he just wanted to stop somehow these screams, poisoning him the legitimate three hundred grams after the show.
He hardly raised the healthy floor vase that stood in the corner and broke it on Popenchenko's head. He collapsed, like a choked, and the police who had just arrived carefully brought the ring master out of the square.
The next evening, an unusual tense atmosphere reigned in the restaurant: everyone was waiting for a breakdown. And indeed, around midnight he entered the hall.
Popenchenko with a shaken head. He looked around, found who he was looking for, and headed to the distant table.
Ramses stood up to meet him in all his almost childhood, stumbled with sad, black eyes in the champion's nose and in complete silence clearly said:
Next time I’ll kill her!
Popenchenko, from surprise, wandered, embraced Ramzes with his famous colouches, splashed onto the neighboring chair... and made friends with him until the end of his short life.

Money ruins people – so we are mostly good people.

I didn’t want to wish you a good morning today.
He is: Why?
I dreamed you changed me. Two times!

At work we move to the use of licensed software.
When attempting to download a Windows 7 update, Internet Explorer declares that it does not trust the Microsoft node and blocks the downloading of files. I don’t trust him either, but frankly.

I had to raise my husband at 6.30.
The alarm ringed, “Sasha, wake up!”
The second time: go, Sasha, get up!
Third time: it’s time, let’s go, it’s time to go! It is half eighth!
And at that moment I realized that my husband had left for a long time, and I shake my two-year-old son so he would get up to go to the airport.

The child’s logic:
A little 5 years old approached my mother with a clean disc that took from a pack on my desk and asked for a marker.
He wrote Shrek 5 with a mark on the disc and brought it to his mother: “Let’s look.
Mother: He will not work.
Small: - Strangely, I saw my dad write the title on the discs and then we looked at them right away.

"Because of budget cuts, they combined mathematics with physical education" (c) Simpsons. I guess I know what Fursenko’s favorite animated series is.)

A sweater is such a warm wool clothes that a child wears when his mother is cold.

Commentary on Navalny's post:
"Alexey, please correct the shit on the country. It is offensive."

No, well, I am surprised... For comparison: you read a fairy tale, you want a unicorn with all your soul. I found. And after some time: and the horn is short, and the pearl does not shine, and swings while riding, and the color could be lighter, and magical dust for 100 km spends a lot... And in general, Why is he not a Pegasus??????? to

<N9COF> I remember how in the subway decided to climb on the armor with my feet
<N9COF> and hang on them like a bikini head down
<N9COF> only I did this procedure
<N9COF> how did the mint approach me))))
<N9COF> and asked what I was doing
<_XXXL_> what did you say to them?
<_XXXL_> is it possible? )))
<N9COF> No, I said I didn’t do anything
<N9COF> and they said the tag no longer do
<N9COF> so now I always owe something

Q: Have you watched the news?
Are you talking about Libya?
Oh yeah yeah yes. And know what it looks like?
Man fell and was injured. To him rush to help "friends " and begin to knock barefoot in the stomach and head. "You, boy, do not resist, we will help you"
And now we will treat you. We are your friends, we will help you.

Rice: What year are you?
Tagged: 1999
Re: How old are you?
The Mason: 15

Why are the warning papers about the possible descent from the roofs of pebbles and snow hanged in such a way that to read them, you have to approach directly to the place where these pebbles are most likely to fall?

It’s very sad when a fool thinks he’s clever.

XXX: So you are her?
Yyy: A gentleman will never insult a lady with the details of their relationship.
XXX: Okay I understand you.
yyy: I can only say that she sucks amazingly!

I go to the market with my mother, carrying bags. Arrived at another booth. A grandmother is trying to slip between us and comes on my foot. I, seemingly about myself, but it came out loud, I say, “I’d apologize!”
The grandmother turns around and says, “Sorry, please!”
Mom, hearing all this, turns to me, “How are you not ashamed?”
Grandma: “But I apologized!”

Blood elf: What is it about?
Leon: about personal life
Blood Elf: What is it?
Leon: personal life is the hernia that prevents you from swinging

In my university, the dreams of weak and stupid administrators are dropped from the 10th floor to the debris of old servers and routers.
And recruits are left for a night without food alone with an unsettled server.

Chuck