For the night, among other things, he threw in the laundry expensive sports socks - 4 pairs. In the morning I hang out my clothes - only 3 pairs of socks. What about...? Clearly, it burst in the car, between the walls of the drum. I was dealing with maths. I split the car in half. Here the wife calls: "I wanted to tell you that she hanged your socks on the battery so that they would dry out faster."

Vagon tea is similar to aeroflot chicken, only in a glass.

Photo from Ivano-Frankivsk - barricade with tires. and the first comment: "Berkut is not, and you want to cut down Kiev."

Case in the office:
Somewhere a cell phone ringed the melody of the Samsung alarm.
This is an alarm! Who is calling him? I am awake!! to

What about ###li, those who are for ##li.
The exit is as free as the entrance.

When training a cat, the main thing is to pretend that you have given exactly the command it has performed.

This is:

XXX: The former congratulated on St. Mary's Day. and valentine. I wish you a night full of magic, magic and mysteries. How did she know I was going to play in Skyrim all night?! to

Maybe that's why she's the former that you're playing at skiing all night)))

From the discussion of a thermal power plant, with many mirrors.

WWW: If you change the focus, you can shoot down satellites.
XXX: Warm up the ocean and wash up people.
YYY: Deltaplans to surprise, aircraft to burn.
ZZZ: Teaching in school Teaching in school Teaching in school O_O

xxx: decent girl should be engaged in hand-making *trollface*
YYY: Yes, please, you can see my handicraft at GitHub)

“We will not be caught up,” because it is impossible to catch up with the last.

A acquaintance told...
He gathered for hunting, dressed warmly (it was in winter), took a rifle and went to a seam storage facility located near the village to shoot rabbits. The hunt consisted of a long and patient waiting for the long-early in the assembly on top of the rolls with seam.
I have my hat (!) He turned back and forward and tied under his beard. At least for masking. After three or four hours of continuous waiting, he began to fall asleep, and suddenly...
From the first person.
There followed a strong blow to the skull... Darkness – even the eye shattered! My heart was thrown out of fear. Then again the sight opened, and the sound above the hat: "Shush-shush-shush-shush," and the hat someone, b***b, pulls up! I was barely overwhelmed: as if the hat with the head hadn’t been cut off.
It turned out that this scratched phyllin from above attacked my rabbit hat. I thought, damn that I caught the rabbit, covered my face with wings, and then almost pulled my butt along with my hat.

A woman from the kitchen cries to her husband:
- Dear, you would like this dish: "Selective pieces of deer and grind under a light pineapple sauce in a stunning transparent bouillon of caesarean"?
Oh Oh Oh Oh my beloved! Will you prepare it for us now?
“No, I read the inscription on the canned box of cat food that I bought today to our Vasske.

SexMex: Yes, he went as ugly as he could.
Ladies and gentlemen, stop as much as you can. Zhenya may be a little wrong in something, but you are telling as if he killed Lipnitskaya by his own hand. and eaten.
And, by the way, it is enough to call her beautiful. She’s smart, she’s talented, she’s a warrior, but she’s still a child, she’s fifteen!
Sex Max: And what I do so 15
Winnie the Pooh. Then you – call it. You can be :)

Conversation of two girls
So interesting he is.
Have you been to the monastery before?
No is
- Don't be surprised, there on several screens are comedies without sound, on one porn, plays a drama and he himself at the same time works.

About the closure of the cinema "Russia" in the city of I:

I loved Russia. You go into this misery, buy a cheap ticket, sit in a semi-empty hall. Something was there.
Foreigners also say the same about our country.

For a very long time I thought that in the competitions of the bobsleighers the medal deserves only the one who runs, and those who are 10 meters flat, and then down the mouth in the bean are sitting all the way without lifting up - obviously do not deserve anything... However, imagine - at a speed of 140 km / h in a tough "car" down the mouth (even on the sides do not look) - here you need to be such a CHAMPION, in order not to get to the finish...

The smoke is hot! I came home from the shower of my girlfriend, fell asleep, turned on the computer, sat in front of him, stared at the monitor for five minutes, and then felt like, “Dirty politician, why did you come into my life?”“" and my mouse was furiously slapped. Then face to table. I rise! I thought he was reading the news.
WOW: What is there?
A: And to him in friends added a former girlfriend of his girlfriend, they met in the dungeon. Not adding, not adding uncomfortable. The intrigue!

I go home with my girlfriend in the bus. In winter, the windows are frozen and we can see poorly. A lot of people stand. We need to go out on the school street. The man ahead:
Stop at school!
After a while another:
At the school please.
Here my girlfriend pouches oil into the fire: pulls out the headphone, and also screams:
Stop at school!
The first man thinks they have already passed (through the windows nothing is seen):
The driver was asked to go to school.! to
The bus floor begins to cry about the unfortunate School. The Driver:
Okay, but I can go to her first!? to

The smartest

(Forum on Emergency Services in Germany)
First, the ambulance is not free. I asked to pay 70. Therefore, false calls are very rare and cases such as "something does not sleep me" almost do not happen.
xx: If in Russia the call "Speed" would cost at least 50 rubles - the number of calls would be halved))
Yy: And if she arrived on time, the number of deaths would have halved.

If the number of false calls were halved, there would be fewer deaths.

The largest Chinese dating site has updated its advertising strategy on the eve of the Chinese New Year.
Now they have the slogan "This year you must definitely get married because grandma can’t wait anymore"
They even shot such a tearwrapping video. The girl comes to her grandmother with a diploma, then with what achievement, and she says one thing: "Have you got married? Are you married?"
At the end of the day, my grandmother died.
That’s because you haven’t married!
Before that, they also had a good strategy, they all told that "living alone is hard" - in the video, the girl sadly changed the light bulb. The Same. one one. Without a man. How at all?

My life is so lonely, it turns out. My grandmother will not wait for her husband, and I turn the bulbs myself. What there! I am collecting the ventilators myself.

You are a missing man. Let’s submit an idea for a new advertisement) all Chinese women immediately rush to the dating site

I, all in tears fight with stubborn screws on the fan? And then I sit and cry on the floor until He comes. A man with a screw! The fan is working, everyone is happy and dancing

HH: And before that you wrote on a dating site, no different.

I installed Windows 32 bit, then installed it 2 times, why doesn’t it become 86 bit? What to do?

32 * 3 = 96
Uninstall Windows 10 once, and you will be lucky.