bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №108810
 01.02.2015
When the group “Lunch in 30 Minutes” publishes photos of cats, I’m scared!

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №108809
 01.02.2015
In primary school, the most beautiful girl in our class was considered Allochka. She liked almost all the boys, but Misha was able to win her position faster than ever. First, he had the name Pugachev, and secondly, already then developed business capability. He just approached and proposed: let’s say, as soon as I’m 18, we’ll get married, and you’ll be ALLOY PUGACHE!

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №108808
 01.02.2015
Russian "model" wins the “Porno-Oscar”
YYY: Hah, the Ministry of Culture misunderstood the import replacement program...

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №108807
 01.02.2015
My sister complains. She is a doctor at St. Petersburg Children's Hospital. Mary of Magdala. Sometimes he responds to calls if the nurse is out of office. And here every second on the phone says: Is this Mary Magdalene? My sister says, I say yes.

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №108806
 01.02.2015
qqq: The words "starter" and "starter" are approximately as similar visually and opposite in meaning as "healing" and "healing".

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №108805
 31.01.2015
From local discussions about "express-coffee" learned a lot about the rules of Russian language, marketing, advertising and business strategy. And I regretted noting how few people are left with just a sense of humor.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №108804
 31.01.2015
Commentary on the film "You will all die!"

Grolla: The title of the film is my appeal to the whole film group after watching it.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №108803
 31.01.2015
Why did the Kharkov cat hire for rubles?

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №108802
 31.01.2015
Oleg Efremov - India has tested a missile capable of carrying a nuclear charge. There will be problems with democracy in India.
Andrei Ponomarov - And in the United States with programmers.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №108801
 31.01.2015
I had to go to science. I would study the frozen feces of mammoths, and next to me a young trainee who is in love with me. But I’t notice it – the main cal!

from somewhere.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №108800
 31.01.2015
In the pharmacy, a guy (MH) addresses the seller (P) with a lion's share of embarrassment:
Q: Girl, tell me, I need an express test.
Q: In the pregnancy?
Sarcastic: The psychological age.
The pharmacy slept.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №108799
 31.01.2015
The cat returned with a broken beard and a broken ear. I worship, disinfect, embrace and embrace the whole cat.
Husband, evil: Why do you kiss him? He has a normal male life, walked all night, returned beaten but happy...I envy him!!! to

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №108798
 31.01.2015
I have an employee. He is a fervent advocate of tolerance, political correctness and everything else, let all the flowers bloom, ready to crush in disputes for the rights of all minorities. At the same time, every time he notices that I write with my left hand (I, in fact, all my life since the birth of the left, just an unobserving uncle), he is surprised. He asks, “Do you write with your left hand?” He says this is wrong and I need to re-learn immediately. Given that the uncle is boring and with a thumbnail, such conversations once a week start to strain. Who will tell me where I should go so that the Left would be recognized as a minority, and he would not be brainstorming me, but someone for my rights?

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №108797
 31.01.2015
I like some creative advertisers. "Do you need money before pay?" Do they really think I’ll buy it? I found a fool. I need money before salary and after salary. Instead of salary.

[ + 24 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №108796
 31.01.2015
A cat wiped out a Kharkov meat machine for 26 thousand rubles
- Truly Ukrainian cat-do not eat, so overbite

>>> For several days, the cat tried the products, choosing, according to employees, the most expensive types.
Apparently I didn’t eat cheap meat.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №108795
 31.01.2015
Jehovah comes in the morning. A nice man of the right age... asks about what will happen to us after we die. launched into the house. He will tell me, or I will tell him. I am in honey. The pathological anatomy. I know exactly what, when, and what will happen after death. I went away quickly, I didn’t even say half.

[ + 29 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №108794
 31.01.2015
This is:
Do not believe,
But at the time when there was the above-mentioned film, the books of Conan Doyle in the above-mentioned country really did not exist.
The deficit was ))))))))))))

No, we will not believe. Although there is a deficit, yes. But: there were libraries, they got the mud, stood in line for subscriptions, took "for the night" to read from those who had a reason.
Otherwise I don’t even know what was read in this “most reading country in the world” if “Conan Doyle” was not read because there was a deficit.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №108793
 31.01.2015
I drive very badly, I can hardly turn. Once a long time ago I bought a normal such a big big "as in adults". I walk in the village along the street and suddenly I start to stop (I will not explain it in a fig) and I finally stop when a big, no... unbiasedly big pile of weed appears on my left hand. Now imagine everything in a slow shooting - the girl on the big slowly and elegantly rolls to the pile of debris and begins to fall on it, then shakes on it along with the big, without showing any emotions and attempts to somehow avoid it. What it was I will not understand until now.)

[ + 24 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №108792
 31.01.2015
<Trener> People, here’s where to take 4 liters... flour?
<Trener> I don’t know how many in kilos.
<Trener> Has done a little to try...

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №108791
 31.01.2015
here
You’d better try to beat your leg, it’s more effective :)
The girl weighing 47 kg who knocked the door when the child accidentally locked
-------------------------
...And not far from there, in my eyes, a fragile gentle girl opened the entrance castle with a key, irritatedly knocked her hand - and pulled the castle out of the door. Just hanging on the key.
= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =
Don’t argue with her, she’s the same girl.

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