bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №108470
 23.01.2015
The pornography industry needs professionals. And not only directly in the field of services, but also in advertising! We had such a sign in the public house that everything was clear to everyone, but everything was decent and censored. And beautiful! It is actually a hotel. And the customer called, praised, grit, the influx of visitors increased. Well, good advertising is a great thing!

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №108469
 23.01.2015
Police urge Norwegians to stop complaining about snowfall
“People call and complain that it’s snowing and that they’re late to work because of it, or that the postman couldn’t bring them the newspaper, and so on. Such applications will be considered!!! Lastly,” the police said in a statement.
As the police spokesman said, “People should accept the fact that they live in Norway and the snow will still go.”
-
Strange impression: the population - fools, police - fans of their business.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №108468
 23.01.2015
I remembered too late:
Here one guy complained about Tarkovsky, he did not like him.

A joke on the subject:
Flying Serpent Gorinich three-headed, meets Ilya Muromza. The first head says.
“Iliush, be my friend, cut off my head!
Why this?
The second head.
We went here to the cinema to fly. Two heads want to look at Schwarzenegger, and the third – Tarkovsky. A foolish eye!


[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №108467
 23.01.2015
here here :
And then suddenly "boom-bom", "this piece is informative, pay a price".
I was so angry about all this. I did not let go, I found something from where it can be downloaded all (!) And it is free (!). In principle, I read this mistake...
*********
I just read "50 Shades of Grey". Let me know, I think, why these people are so foolish. A piece of information!
She said "nu nahuy" and pressed "closing the tab".
I got acquainted, thanks. The book is shit.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №108466
 23.01.2015
The cat approaches the lying dog, touches the leg. The dog is demonstratively stretched out, the cat sits more comfortably and begins meedly, in turn changing the legs to scratch the dog's nails. The dog smiles joyfully puts him in a pulse - itching a stroke)) From the side looks like a massage session

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №108465
 23.01.2015
Wintersun: $%&@#!!! to
Wintersun: repaired the pants - stinged himself for the egg...
Wintersun: The Sugar
Castor: I had the same yesterday.
Wintersun: Nahera made them so painful
Castor: Shob Berog

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №108464
 22.01.2015
XX: translates as God puts on the soul
There is no God! 1! to
xxx: * translates how singularity on the metaphysical conception of the mind
xxx: fixtures

[ + 39 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №108463
 22.01.2015
Stanis Tikhonovskiy – “the overwhelming majority of Ukrainians see it (Ukraine) precisely unitary, not federal.”
The overwhelming majority of Ukrainians don’t even know what differentiates the unitary from the federal.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №108462
 22.01.2015
Vegan-violent dystrophy is a consequence of mortgage))))

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №108461
 22.01.2015
No, experimenting to please a loved one is good! But...if you close your eyes to the stitched floor, the plate and the deadly fried dishes, then everything will be fine too. After all, men really do not notice dirt and garbage until they are locked up.
She almost divorced her, until he convinced me that he was really dumb, there is dust in the corners or not, and that washing the floor for 2 hours in the same room until the glow is a perversion. It’s more important for him that I’m fun, playful and inclined to sex. And the dishes in the washing machine stand, stood and will stand! until his mother comes, demonstrably will not rub the plate and will not convince his son that it is impossible to live with such a mess!

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №108460
 22.01.2015
Red beard: We have a hygienic fingers moisturizer on the admin table of the FOV network. by Bikovsky.
(We are on this table, acts and other accounting)
Every guest, every bitch, every person. Takes, turns, turns back, opens the lid, puts the fingers (not always clean), swings, closes, puts in place.
The red beard! I found them in charge!
Stalker (Vitaly) is a scrapper? The superclay? Beating a man?
Red beard: Now the calligraphic inscription "Creme for the buttocks"", article.....
Stalker: You are evil!
Red beard: Take, turn, put back sharply!
Profit to!! to

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №108459
 22.01.2015
“I consider it morally justified to remove abortion operations from the system of compulsory medical insurance, which is supported at the expense of taxpayers, including those who categorically refuse abortion,” he said.


I support a reasonable and thoughtful proposal. I also propose to withdraw the RPC from television and other public institutions supported by taxpayers, including those who categorically do not accept the RPC.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №108458
 22.01.2015
From the INSTALL.BAT file in the Denwer installation:

What did you forget, let me ask you?
< a lot of empty lines>
Before you change anything, think twenty times.
< a lot of empty lines>
Once you have decided, you will have to learn to read DOS-coding.
<commands and comments to them (in DOS coding, yes)>
Here we will deal with the mistakes (tfu-tfu).
<more teams>
< a lot of empty lines>
So you got here too? Incredible perseverance...
<Teams >

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №108457
 22.01.2015
Palich: It was a long time ago. I have a friend. I gave him a Vietcong toy. There is a level where you have to crawl through dark tunnels and beat out the insidious Vietnamese. About the fact that the lamp is turned on by the L button, a friend did not know. Picture with oil! In the deep night his wife sees such horror. Her husband sits behind the compound in the headphones, watches in the square of Malevich and nervously rolls on the chair, swinging with the mouse. Her first thought was: "It’s done! It is time to talk". She approached him, placed her hand on her shoulder... screams were on the whole entrance! My friend postponed the brick inexorably. The most interesting thing is that he this level then so without the lamp and passed. and stubborn.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №108456
 22.01.2015
Teacher in Practice:
I don’t like good guys very much. They will come once you understand, they will all give up and go, we will never see each other again. But with the twins on the fourth edition, you can already talk about the meaning of life.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №108455
 22.01.2015
And here the miner includes TV, and there: Sechin’s 25-year-old son was awarded the Order for many years of conscientious work. And the miner is like this: Obama, shit, monkey!

I’ll go and drink vodka and wood at the reactor in Podkin.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №108454
 22.01.2015
I have seen a real fighter for moral bases once in my life. About the decline of morals in our time he told, lying naked in my bed and interrupted when my wife called on the cell phone. Given that he lied to me that he was divorced, the scene was unpleasant. Since then, it is even unpleasant to admit that I have some moral attitudes, suddenly they will think that I am the same.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №108453
 22.01.2015
By the way, for artificial fertilization, sperm is given by masturbation, and fertilization occurs under a microscope thanks to doctors. That is, it turns out, the child from the test tube is the most real handmade.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №108452
 22.01.2015
Anastasia: Fuck, I want to go to this movie, but the way it’s broken up – it’s a desire (
Marina: Why is it?
Anastasia: "here are all the bodies going to porn in the movie"
Anastasia: bad reputation, shorter
Marina: What is it
Marina: And I'll go, because when I'll watch porn on the big screen again
Marina: on such a big screen

[ + 26 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №108451
 22.01.2015
here here :

Thro my life, I have been taught to put dirty socks in the laundry by my father, my mother, my girlfriend, my wife... And the cat taught me, because if he does it, I have to go to the store for new ones.

— — —
I was also taught to put dirty socks in my laundry, but I only managed to put them on.

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