bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №93352
 02.02.2014
My mother gave me:
Comrades, behave well! You are cats!

[ + 28 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №93351
 02.02.2014
When I dropped, instead of cigarettes, I ate iris... happ really dreams that I smoke, am I the only one?

Many are dreaming. I still dream that I smoked, although more than 5 years have passed. I smoke and feel guilty, blin, why do I do this, smoke again!! Shock and horror in dreams and regrets. Six months ago I stopped eating meat (except fish) and dreamed a couple of times that I ate meat and the same feelings, guilt and regret)

When I was on a diet, I watched interesting dreams at night about eating cakes, chocolate and bread with fat - all this in detail, with taste and smell, but without shame and regret. I knew it was a dream. I woke up completely satisfied. This is what I understand, help from the subconscious.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №93350
 02.02.2014
Olga
Hi to

Sergey
Hi to

Olga
Would you say, what is there in this myth of myth? Bce ppoixdoit not cluchaine.And we vcpechaeam tex people, who ppoix ought to be vcpechate? And we have come together in order to bring something and what to teach one another?

Sergey
I take revenge in the name of the moon.
No is

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №93349
 02.02.2014
I don’t want to go to universe tomorrow.
Isn’t it Sunday tomorrow?
o o o o o
precisely
My wish is fulfilled :D

[ + 18 - ] [6 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №93348
 02.02.2014
In comments to the news "In the Congo street traffic management commissioned robot":
xxx: I am even afraid to imagine the price of such a Russian robot developed in Skolkovo
yyy: only six additional zeroes
zzz: but our robot will have a hole to accept bribery

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №93347
 02.02.2014
Teacher (thinking about SHA’s technological advances): Not only do their drones fly...
No pilots without pilots.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №93346
 02.02.2014
<shai> and yesterday the Friday Prayer was

<[PEER]Dyxa> shai: And what did you pray?

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №93345
 01.02.2014
The forum discusses a video from Arizona, where after a 40-minute chase, a police officer shot a hijacker while trying to surrender.
xxx: the pindostans the body hands and handcuffs wear)))
Not a dead body but a non-American.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №93344
 01.02.2014
The xxx:
Somewhere below was the phrase "You can't teach the Matan - teach the statutes"
I am a student, I am a student, I am a student, I am a student, I am a student, I am a student. :)

Bonus for studying the charters -15 to retirement age. and :)

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №93343
 01.02.2014
If you come home belly and can’t go to bed because of helicopters, you need to...
You need to lie on the bed, but put one leg on the floor. The helicopters are stopped! Learned by a well-known biologist, it works impeccably.

This is called "throw an anchor". And you can also "land", lie on your stomach and lean your fist to the floor. Well, if you are sleeping on the floor, then "we squat", just hold something by the hand.
Former Beer Alcanat

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №93342
 01.02.2014
The Modern:

When I read about Robinson Crusoe at the Institute, I liked the book. As I read it now, I realized that he just opened the era of Twitter. "I went to the forest". "I walked into the tree". "I made a scarf". "I am very unhappy" "I caught a goat" "I made a fence" "I am deeply unhappy", well, and so on, reading in the light of modern realities is nice.

You just don’t understand what the fundamental difference is. The book preserves the style of real diaries. The man worked a lot, was very tired, so he wrote briefly and only in order not to go crazy. Your own tweet is, basically, a recording of empty events and immature reflections, as well as another way to self-admiration.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №93341
 01.02.2014
We take a taxi. We see the card “Your driver Serroja”. A friend turns to the driver: “A tell Sergey...” “I am not Sergey” – sharply breaks her driver. We look at it, well, it is written. Seeing our confusion, the driver complacently adds: “I am not gay, I am a goose!”

[ + 23 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №93340
 01.02.2014
Why if you click in the search line of Yandex or Google "coconut marmelade" or "coffee mill" - you from all the internet-shells many days in a row will climb advertising for marmelade and coffee mill, and if you pick "kill all people" - then continue to climb all the same coffee mill and marmelade?

This is unfair to me as a search engine user.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №93339
 01.02.2014

by Alexander:

Blessed
the last file you named "Pets"
I just looked at the design, but did not pay attention to the title.
Without looking at the director.
today was in the office, I ask, "have I received a visit card?", he is such, "yes..." and looks at me this way O_o
I think he’s smoking so much on me...

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №93338
 01.02.2014
The xxx:
He told me I was stupid.

YYY :
Search by word "dura" in our old correspondence issued
- 20 of your posts with the text "I am a fool" or similar
- 2 my answers "you are not a fool"
- and 1 my answer "Okay, you are a fool"

And then "I told you"?

The xxx:
YYY, you did not argue.

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №93337
 01.02.2014
My husband has called me Hitler for a year. I woke him up on June 22 at 4 o’clock in the morning because I started fighting!)))

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №93336
 01.02.2014
I am changing my suitcase from python leather for a 3-bedroom apartment in the center of Bryansk.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №93335
 01.02.2014
February has begun. I know that, t.k. Our working printer sent me a monthly report by soap.
Yes, in 5 years you will have a wide range of communication by correspondence with a printer, coffee maker and turniket on guard.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №93334
 01.02.2014
Yesterday I drank beer with friends at KFS, decided to stick like in the advertisement - I sat in the bowl, and the friends dragged me on a shell along the box office. No fun at the staff - I didn't get any prizes, but the guard drove us all out (

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №93333
 01.02.2014
Laugh in vain. To defend your right not to drink in a collective and at the same time not to become an exorcist is not so simple. This is an energy-consuming process, believe me.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna