From the forum:
If you were a girl and lived according to the principle - Well, tell me everything, or I will guess myself, it will be worse!

The director (woman) tells about one designer:
- And here he is... such an airy, tender green color, creature...
by зам. The Director:
The PID?
The Director:
Well, why not... just all the designs are thick...
by зам. The Director:
- Well don't tell me... our designers are quite... you won't understand, the designers or the designers...

XXX: I have a cat today. I chased the toy mouse on the floor for half an hour, pulled it under the closet and waited for me to pull it out. He sat down and started chasing the imaginary mouse on the floor. He put her under the couch and looked at me expressively. He got up, pulled everything out of the closet, moved away, got his toy mouse, and he zero attention. He sits on the couch, waiting for me to get out of his imaginary mouse.

Assassin's Creed 3
There is an opportunity to interact with domestic animals.

I am tormented by vague doubts.
Fuck the goose?

Yandex News: Mississippi abolished slavery.

Do we have the right to be abolished?? to

A successful person is one who has managed to acquire his happiness, who has a good, successful career, a happy family, beloved wife, husband, children.
Yyy: Damn, is there a man who has a beloved wife and husband?!...

When will the button "dirty" be added here?? to

Tagged with: hello
Kuuuzya: guess where I am!! to
Dvvarf: I am pooher

Existential programmers keep hopeless people in a system of vanity control.

xxx: rainbow, RGB, this is the Pidor junta all
Real men see everything monochrome.

See also: yoyo

Oh God, I’m beginning to distinguish colours! Beer and raw meat!

That’s how you’ve been friends with a man for a few years, you’re going to a movie... you’re cheering with him in a macdake... you’re cracking... you’re breaking up in a computer... you’re talking about a girl... you’re trusting him in everything...
And then it turns out that he bought the fifth iPhone :(

In the pharmacy today. In front of me is a man (M), not very well speaking Russian. The Pharmacy (A)
Q: Do you have a test?
A: There is! What test?
M: Well the test...
A is pregnant?
M is yes. for pregnancy.
A is female?

Discuss the study of the proof of the value of glutamate, where the researcher spotted it to mice. One of the comments:

I put in my veins a plate of borst,
I put a small slice,
I slipped the carousel,
I smelled a pig.
And then I dance, sound!

(Research of the wrong-looking website)

Let’s fix the eye designer!
Go on, admin – Pidaras!

From the discussion of the upcoming concert of Yura Shatunov:
In fact, at concerts, Yuri Vasilyevich Shatunov, instead of his songs, has long been performing exclusively belcanto Jermone’s party from Traviata for lyrical baritone and instrumental covers of Iron Maiden....just no one knows....because no one walks...

You know, Lisa is one of those girls who need to give on the first date instead of a plush mouse and a postcard a fox and Hegel's tomic.

Blonde: I’ve been told too often that I’m magical :)
Max: Maybe they mean you’re a fairy tale fool? O_O

I adore my colleague. and :)
Work until 18:00
Every day at 17:59 he stands up from the table with the words:
Enough of it! I have endured! And quickly disappears.

XXX: How is it?
YYY: I am learning to test. There are thousands of bugs around us.
xxx: I want a bag that allows you to get an unlimited amount of gold!
XXX: Or at least in some situations to pass through walls.
YYY is the door.

I was in the post office (I will not say, I am tired already), I see - a new girl is working. The hair is long, the facial features are soft, a blush with a flower, a dressed shirt. The voice is low, maybe loud. Only when he is!!! By the name, I realized that it was, fucking, a winnow. If, suddenly, it happens to go to the 493 branch, Avangardna street 18 - let's argue, you can't guess which of the operators the boy?