I work in a clothing store. A boy comes in with his mother and says, "Give this beautiful girl the best dress, she's birthday today, I'm crying!" I put 120 rubles on the box and with an important look stood waiting for my mom to pick something. At the entrance was my father. He showed gestures that we would sell the dress for those 120 rubles, and he would then come and calculate. very cute.

From the testimony of Yulia Skripal: "When I bought a strawberry in Peterochka, I was still surprised - why Putin himself is there at the box office?"

Our business partner (a lawyer by profession) does not tolerate phone spammers, because his direct mobile hangs on the site like a contact phone.

The Standard Spam Call:

SPAMER: Hello, can I talk to an employee who submits tax reports in your company?

Partner: We do not submit tax reports.

C: How is it? And the accounting?

Q: We are working black, without reports. We don’t need an accountant.

Q: What if I call the tax office?

Q: We will come to you and shoot you.

There were no more questions.

A couple of months ago I did repairs, some of the items I bought myself, including a hammer and a perforator. After the repair a couple of times borrowed to the neighbors, but soon sold because of unnecessity. Today comes a neighbor and asks to borrow a buyer, I answer that I did not sell. The neighbor's eyes are 5 copies. How sold it? Why didn’t he say! I have already called the master. I promised that the next time I decided to sell something, I would definitely consult him. I didn’t appreciate humor :(

We are not interested in the gold party. Can you tell who and at what price gave up the iron curtain?

From the stories of the “movements” of the construction workers.

After the first course, we, real yet children, with the unbeaten until the end consciousness of my sons, sent to the construction team to the distant Volodovskiy. To build a railway either to forestry farms, or to the areas of Kotlas and the surrounding area. The headquarters of the detachment was confused - where to send this young shellfish, so as not to confuse it under the feet of the zombies of the summer shabash. And by his naivety, he did not go where it was necessary to assign and steal the headquarters. Fortunately or unfortunately for them, some local forestry company asked a group of students to put them on a remote site with a barrel for shooters and trucks. whom? Here are the ones to exercise. And here they bring the child to a remote pick-up, load them out a potato tank, a box of potatoes, point their finger to the shell where they live and the other finger to the place where in a week the shell should stand. Removing the hand, they say - the forest and the columns of the tam, the wire to turn here, the boards and the shiffer to remove from those cabins. We take in a week. and wrapped. We remained alone. As they arranged, they built a mangal and went to look for pillars. Probably not on that side. Now we realize that what we found was not intended for the navy. These were LEP supports, stored together or simply hidden by someone until the better times. But an order is an order. It is said to do, it must. That this fucking unbearable weight - did not make anyone think at all. On the contrary, we are physics engineers of the future. From the pipes of the destroyed water pump made a railway, on it placed rolls from a rotten tractor, drawn on paper in cells a plan. and forward.
They forgot about us. I came to take the task in two weeks. They were met by a gang of bearded swollen from the bites of mosquitoes and mosquitoes in the bats, left of the beautiful forms of the construction workers at first, and behind their back stood THIS! The giant size of the heroin with a height of 20 meters, covered with a thick wall of rust iron with balancers from the wind load (we are physicists crazy). Oh yeah, just spoke the director of the Lespromhoza. There was a slang from the staff of the surrounding areas. Probably we’ve hit the chairman’s ass. Overall it ended well. At our anchor, locals first conducted excursions, and then adapted for the storage of left-handed pile materials and helicopters. They paid us 300 rubles and sent us away from our sins to our mothers. Only then we left as boys, and came as fighters, men who did their men's hard work for the first time. It was a construction team.

“Hurra, comrades, Christ has risen!”! to
Wait, the stranger has risen. Our in a week.

Interesting truth, not an opinion about it.

The best teacher

At the beginning of the school year, the class leader of the 6th grade stood in front of her former fifth grade students. She looked at her children and said that she loved them all equally and was happy to see them. It was a big lie, because behind one of the front sides, crumbling in pieces, there was a boy who the teacher did not like.
She met him, as well as all of her students, in the last school year. She noticed that he didn’t play with classmates, was wearing dirty clothes and smelled like he’d never washed. Over time, the teacher's attitude toward this student became worse and came to the point that she wanted to scratch all his written works with a red pen and put a unit.

Once, the student asked to analyze the characteristics of all students since the beginning of their education in school, and the teacher put the case of an unloved student to the very end. When she finally reached him and unwillingly began to study his characteristics, she was stunned.

The teacher who was leading the boy in the first class wrote, “This is a brilliant child, with a radiant smile. Do homework carefully and carefully. It’s a pleasure to be next to him.”

A second-grade teacher wrote about him: “He is an excellent pupil, appreciated by his comrades, but he has problems in the family: his mother is ill with an incurable illness, and his life at home must be a struggle with death.”

A third-class teacher said: "The death of his mother hit him very hard. He does his best, but his father is not interested in him and his life at home may soon affect his education if nothing is done."

The fourth grade teacher wrote: "The boy is optional, does not show interest in studying, has almost no friends and often falls asleep right in the classroom."

After reading the characteristics, the teacher became very ashamed of herself. She felt even worse when, on New Year’s Eve, all the students brought her gifts wrapped in a glossy gift paper with bands. The gift of her unloved student was wrapped in a rough brown paper. Some children started laughing when the teacher took out a bracelet, which lacked a few stones, and a bottle of perfume, filled a quarter.

But the teacher suppressed laughter in the classroom, shouting, “Oh, what a beautiful bracelet! - and, opening the bottle, sprinkled a little spirit on her wrist. On that day, the boy stopped after the lessons, approached the teacher and said, "Today you will smell like my mother smelled.

When he left, she was crying a long time. From that day on, she refused to teach only literature and mathematics, and began to teach children goodness, principles, and sympathy. After some time of such training, the unloved student began to return to life. At the end of the school year, he became one of the best students.

Despite the fact that the teacher repeated that she loved all the students equally, she really appreciated and loved only him.

A year later, when she was already working with others, she found a note under the door of the classroom where the boy wrote that she was the best teacher he had ever had.

It took another five years before she received another letter from her former student; he told her that she had graduated from college and was estimated to be third in the class, and that she continued to be the best teacher in his life.

Four years passed and the teacher received another letter where her student wrote that, despite all the difficulties, she would soon be graduating from the university with the best grades, and confirmed that she is still the best teacher he has ever had in his life.

Four years later, another letter arrived. This time he wrote that after graduating from university he decided to improve his level of knowledge. Now before his name and surname was the word doctor. And in that letter he wrote that she was the best of all the teachers he had in his life.

The time went. In one of his letters, he told me that he had met a girl and married her, that his father died two years ago and asked if she would refuse to take the place where the bridegroom’s mother usually sits at his wedding. Of course, the teacher agreed.

On the day of her student's wedding, she wore the same bracelet with the missing stones and bought the same perfumes that reminded the once unhappy boy of his mother. They met, hugged, and he smelled the native.

Thank you for your faith in me, thank you for giving me a sense of need and importance and for teaching me to believe in my own strength, for teaching me to distinguish between good and bad.

The teacher with tears in her eyes replied:

You are wrong, you have taught me everything. I didn’t know how to teach until I met you.

My neighbor has a perforator, but I have a piano. Repairs are over, and music is forever.

The whole area thought of me as a joke, because every night I almost came home in different cars. Absolutely different. Years ago, Edison was back. The taxi in which I was served, in the dark hours of the day preferred to travel exclusively on cars without shacks. The cooperatives were made up of guys who, for reasons not understood to me, did not use the identification signs (well, maybe they were ashamed to tax, although this is a shame) and it was for this reason that the whole district idiot thought that I gave everyone to the right and to the left. And I took a taxi almost every day because the organization I worked for didn’t want to pay the bank if we didn’t have time to get to them with money. The point is that at that time I was 18, and I was a virgin. From a neighbor whom I met later, years later, I learned that the entire district people thought I had died somewhere from AIDS, because I give everyone right and left. I just moved. This is how rumors are born.

The best mirror measure is if our authorities in Moscow also begin to confiscate the funds of officials obtained by criminal means!

Last day of the week. In the dormitory, an uncomfortable student, in the light of a desk lamp, draws a drawing of the A2 format. At night, the long work is finally over. I left the drawing on the table dry.
The sausage will not dry completely soon - sugar is added. This was done in our time by real esthetics - all the elements of the drawing were made voluminous and in a special gloss.
The eternally hungry cockroaches found nothing to eat from the eternally hungry students.
P.S The poor man received. Missing, at first glance, the drawing, when carefully examined, turned out to be quite readable, and the laughing reed - a man.

The UK has suspended the supply of spare parts for Rolls Royce and Bentley to Russia.
I am shocked: this is a knife in the back!

My cat got upset. It is very likely that the UK is behind this, as there is no other plausible explanation.

We live on the 1st floor of the 5th floor house. And so it happened that from the side of the garden we have an open door and we use it. We have a local cat. He does not ask for food, and even if you try to give him a sausage or something like it will not be. They don’t just give up milk. The cat is basically half the street floor of the home of those he knows allows to himself. And then this cat is sitting on the doorstep of our house and I hear my mom mocking him. I say you go here useless, you spread the flea, you go to work, you will live there and catch mice. She works in a large hospital. In general, the Cat listened to everything he was told and left for his business. The next morning, before everyone went to work and study. At our doorstep we found the body of a large rat with a slow throat. A rat the size of a cat. After that, the cat's mother no longer cried and began to pour milk on him. With such a meat diet, it is now clear why he doesn’t eat anything and asks only for milk. From this we can conclude that our smaller brothers understand us perfectly. At least those who live among people.
by PS. He didn’t bring us rats anymore. He looks around 1-2 times a week, drinks milk and leaves for his business.

And does it not seem strange to you that no Russian deputy or official has stated that in protest against the expulsion of Russian diplomats he sells all real estate in the EU or the United States and takes his family to Russia?

Once I rented an apartment and next to it, behind the wall, (but the apartment went out to the neighboring entrance) a woman lived, forever struggling with her dog.

The poor dog got everything:

“With dirty legs,”

for not eating properly,

And for eating around the bowl,

and for the “Cobelin, where do you prey.”

And she cried, "I'd better have a pig, eat less, and then you can hit."

I was very sorry for the dog. And then one day she discovered that she had no dog, only her husband.

Stuttgart in Germany. I do not speak German well, I need to call on the phone, I try to find out if they speak English.

I’m Speechen Zhi English (do you speak English? ) is?

There is shit.

I’m Russian, I’ll be Russian too.

Sasha, I wanted to ask you. The task is what...

Do you have advice or advice?

What is the difference?

Advice is free, advice for money.

The advice, of course!

My advice is to sign up for a consultation.