bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 67 - ] Comment quote №43452
 20.02.2011
My daughter asked for money for the grass yesterday.
YYYYYYYYYYYYY = D
xxxx: a cat for cats

[ + 72 - ] Comment quote №43451
 20.02.2011
xxx: Did you hear how yyy found an admin for the company?
zzz: let me tell you
xxx: Generally speaking, he accidentally wrote the following message to the contact letter:
"You, you are not there looking, porn I have on disk C:\ in the prn" folder.
Then, of course, I wrote to everyone "Not in that window", contact-list rjet, and then one person writes to him "o_O A how did you create a folder prn, UNC-way, what"?
I went to work without questions.

[ + 69 - ] Comment quote №43450
 20.02.2011
Lectures in Higher Mathematics. Propodša diligently draws out some equation, the audience whispers about its own. And then everyone is silent for a second and in the grave silence from the back of the port is "Suka".
It turns and it is not so disturbing:
- The casex where we took X is not clear to everyone.

[ + 52 - ] Comment quote №43449
 20.02.2011
The law of nature: You can't be strong - you must be fast; you can't be fast - you must be crazy; you can't be crazy - you must be smelly.

[ + 48 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №43448
 20.02.2011
The call. A schoolmate calls.
Are you friends with the internet? He asks.
Well, within certain limits, yes, I answer.
- Then quickly go to the local Forum, and in the section "Photo - video" look for
“Trivial History” and read and watch.
I open, enter and read the text below.

A non-trivial story
Author - Stravaganza 0 - 15.02.2011 - 2:58

I once went to the flea market, where grandparents and grandmothers sold all kinds of stuff. I see that one old man, among his old keys, glands, wine bottles, and other garbage, which he considered a commodity, has a single wide film. I was surprised, as I did not notice any more photographic accessories on his newspaper deck. I came, took it in my hands, I see it – it’s already exposed. Being intrigued, I ask, why does Grandpa sell the already filmed film? Grandfather in response swears and loves that the film is clean, not shot, and generally the most that is excellent. I tried to point the old woman to the inscription "exposed" on the video, but the veteran refuses, and continues to insist that the film is clean, take it now and take it, better the film in the world you will not find, and all in the same spirit. To the question of where he got this film, the retired man could not answer anything understandable, obviously himself no longer remembered. This story seemed funny to me, and I bought this film. I used to watch it for a long time, but once, showing my black and white films, I showed it. It turned out to be a classic "amateur" film, (amateur is the term that in the photography lab where I worked at the time, called the films, in which thirty-six frames contained several birthdays, a trip to the sea, and a new year) - here you and winter, and summer, and all this in twelve frames 6x6. Then I threw this carelessly washed film, and it lasted for ten years, no less. And now, when I came across it recently, it seemed to me a shit to keep a piece of someone’s family history, and not even try to find those for whom these images might be invaluable. In this regard, I ask the local everyday people to look at these faces, maybe you will see someone of your acquaintances, yet not everyone in this city kept their family records in a broad format?
http://forums.kuban.ru/forum/viewtopic_new.php?t=3801254&all=all

Following this text are placed four black-and-white photographs, one of which only a glance made you shudder and almost tears. I and my family have been in the picture 30 years ago. The kids are very small. I call my eldest daughter. For example, please join this forum. There is a grandson behind. In a few minutes I hear a scream of amazement.
On the "telephone forum" recalled the case when 29 years ago, in a hurry, went to the cinema with his wife in a car. As I walked out of the cinema, I saw a light burning in my car. It became clear that the thief was in a hurry and did not knock the door. Along with the jacket, my favourite “Amateur-2” disappeared – the cheapest and one of the best cameras of the time and a cassette with a film taken.
Could it have been assumed that the pictures would return to me a quarter of a century later?

[ + 68 - ] Comment quote №43447
 20.02.2011
If you were called to the home phone and asked the idiotic question, “Are you at home?Don’t get angry and calmly answer, “Yes, where are you?“”

[ + 55 - ] Comment quote №43446
 20.02.2011
I will show you who is the washing machine and who is the beautiful old Russian city.

[ + 61 - ] Comment quote №43445
 20.02.2011
In every girl there are constantly two beings fighting: a cat thirsty for freedom and a dog in need of a master.
YYY: In this case, every man has a zoophile.

[ + 65 - ] Comment quote №43444
 20.02.2011
I never understood why Gandalf was killed in Harry Potter.

[ + 69 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №43443
 20.02.2011
You go to the kitchen for tea, you realize that the cup is at the company, you return, you update the contact, you go back to the kitchen, and again you realize that the cup is at the company.

[ + 70 - ] Comment quote №43442
 20.02.2011
Comment on the video confirmation of the ID of the VKontakte page of one of the girls from home-2:

xxx: they have crazy fans there and worshippers appear... but how can there be fans in those who have not done them? Well, I just ate, slept, fucked and quarrelled... so I was! Where do I ask my fans?

[ + 86 - ] Comment quote №43441
 20.02.2011
Yes, Russian films are just what it takes to make an objective view of reality.
yyy> just noticed this fit)no more))
Judging by Russian films, every second Russian is a bullshit urka, every second woman is a pale.
yyy> :D
yyy> burning
Every Third Russian is a Special Forces Officer.
yyy> and the fourth

[ + 72 - ] Comment quote №43440
 20.02.2011
Yesterday the charge died, the phone was running for 24 hours, asking to eat. I have a wild man’s cry on the phone. Someone calls today, the phone whispers wildly and dies.

[ + 62 - ] Comment quote №43439
 20.02.2011
Toast on my birthday:
You are just gold!
You are not gold, you are platinum.
Here is a voice from under the table:
Uranus is enriched.

[ + 72 - ] Comment quote №43438
 20.02.2011
Conversation with a group:
How did you get into the club?
XXX is great! We did what we couldn’t.
Divided by zero?

[ + 84 - ] Comment quote №43437
 20.02.2011
The Internet, let go of life!! to
YYY: And to eat.
Zzzz in the toilet.

[ + 56 - ] Comment quote №43436
 20.02.2011
Theme: mm
Q: I have eaten
Half a cake
XXX: It's almost like sex just as shameless
XX: and requires less effort
That is better than sex!
Q: How much did you eat it?
xxx: nine minutes in 10 minutes
That’s 10 times longer than sex.
xxx: and

[ + 60 - ] Comment quote №43435
 20.02.2011
During the breakfast. In the kitchen I, wife, son (2.5 years old)
Let me give my mom a salad. My mom loves salad.
The son: to squeeze?
I: No, son, it is the salad.
My wife slipped under the table.

[ + 73 - ] Comment quote №43434
 20.02.2011
words of acquaintance.
I left my niece for a couple of hours, she was two years old. The answer is "Go to". And so all the time. Finally her mother comes and I ask her:
What do you teach the child? She sent me all day.
and A! Give her a DVD.
- O_O
See also.
Inserts a disk, includes a multiplex. The child stumbled in his hand:
By the slang! By the slang!
About the Elephant! of the elephant!

[ + 60 - ] Comment quote №43433
 20.02.2011
I woke up at 6 in the morning to have time to wash my head. and washed. When I get dressed, I’m on the threshold and I’m thinking about what jacket to wear so it’s warmer. I look at the thermometer. 32 and you all go. I split up and went to sleep.
The epic fail!

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