bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №106074
 28.11.2014
Two police officers are going on the crossing, and behind them the bomber is wrapping and swinging: "Well, take me, because it's cold, guys, how cold it is here!"

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №106073
 28.11.2014
With the Hicks, from the discussion of the upcoming law on what to watch, and even more the creation of erotic images with characters similar to minors (anime — big eyes, photo — school uniform, etc.) On the Internet will give prison sentences from 3 to 10 years, more than for causing serious bodily injury:
by ErgoZr:
That is, if I go and remove someone before resuscitation and disability, is it less harmful than if I watch hentai? Or am I misunderstood something?
by Veam:
The logic here is this – if you look at the hentai, then you are a pedophile, and no one can be worse than a pedophile.
They were even forbidden to give.
by SovGVD:
And can we get more details about “in school form” and “Making... without the purpose of dissemination, public demonstration”?
I wanted to buy my wife a suit and a camera.
by Dimakovalenko:
Better beat your wife, they will give less.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №106072
 28.11.2014
We have a security guard at work. Such a healthy man. He knows thousands of terms and generally all kinds of cool security chips. Well so here. Someone at work is trying to eat someone else’s food. It will get out of the refrigerator, eat, wash the plate and put it back. We put a camera in the kitchen. And now our cool security guard comes up with tasks:" Please help me find my kefir". This is so. He also studied in graduate school.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №106071
 28.11.2014
Ahah) here the beard on Skype with a friend cheats and a friend lists what he needs in the toy
"Yes, I need a golda, I need an inst, I need a p..." 
Here is his mother behind the picture:
You have to go to the exam, idiot!and "


[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №106070
 28.11.2014
Raf: Why are you silent? Do you work or shake?
Zerowin: throwing
Raf: WV or a member?
Zerowin: Member
Raf: own or foreign?
Zerowin: Enough is enough! I am working!

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №106069
 28.11.2014
Discussion of the news about the next withdrawal of the cumulative part of the pension for the year:
Those who receive money in envelopes have no right to demand anything from the state. And those who pay taxes have the full right to ask what...
You will ask and then tell us what you have answered.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №106068
 28.11.2014
Misanthrope: It was always interesting, in the aircraft of the second world machine guns shot through the propeller, the automation synchronization did not let you shoot when a spade appeared on the way.But what if the cartridge was squeezed or married any, and from the moment of hitting the capsule to the shot there will be a slight delay? Will the screw have time to check, and then the bullet will shoot the blade?

AndI: why the synchronizer, you can’t just make a hole in the screw, and you can safely shoot, the bullets will fly into this hole:

Dave: And you don’t have to do it specifically. She will appear herself.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №106067
 28.11.2014
The main cockroach. He is the worst, the house girls are their mother. As a rule, powerful, uncompromising, very strict, with a failed personal life. And otherwise how can you explain that the girl from school smoothly goes through the institute to work, never going on a date and not staying with a girlfriend"...But automatically believes that "all men are goats and they only need".

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №106066
 28.11.2014
Here we and the child constantly need certificates to the pool, and they become obsolete, and in order to write such a certificate, we need all the fresh tests, and in order to help health care, vs just scanned the old certificate and change only the date...All well.
— — —
Mda, darkness and anti-health at the level. And the old lady doesn’t even come to mind WHY!) The certificate gets obsolete so quickly! Yes, because a normal child does not live in the capsule and can catch the infection at any time, and then quickly spread it to EVERYONE who goes to this pool!

But if her child then comes with a nightmare infection, trapped in the water from another of the same " with last year's analysis" - so will be the employees of the pool, the state, the children of others, but only not such ladies, in whom "their bloodshed", of course, nothing can hurt and infect. The Dark.

[ + 26 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №106065
 28.11.2014
I stopped calling the environmental systems when my husband replied and said that I was taken to the dirt, but the billists asked "when she will return" Laughing

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №106064
 28.11.2014
The student asks:
Abram, how much is two times two?
Depending on how much you need...
= = = = = is = is = is = is = is = is = is = is = is
The public is disgusted!
Abram, how much is two times two?
Do we buy or sell?
= = = = = is = is = is = is = is = is = is = is = is

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №106063
 28.11.2014
On some forum saw a non-working link to a video, how to make a garage for a bike. Interestingly, something happened, I decided to look for it on YouTube. I enter "garage for b".. Below are the most frequent queries. The first on the list - "garage for BTR". You see, people are preparing, approaching thoroughly to buy.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №106062
 28.11.2014
My friend gave me a note to repair.

I am your note. He is cursed, is he talking to me?? to

What do you mean? ?

In the dark, I watch a movie about ghosts. Here from the note (which half an hour as turned on, and there is nothing on it, nothing at all) begins to broadcast in English... wanted to knock a knife of pure iron into it, pour salt and burn it.

and hahaha. He can ))

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №106061
 28.11.2014
My nephew in the third class, a task on the Russian language "Fantasize". The first question sounds like "Which flower would you like to be friends with? Tell me about your friendship.", he carefully writes about the chamomile and how he will take care of it and water it.The second question "To which country would you go with a pink elephant?" The child as a true fan of Martin Harrison writes - TO HOLLAND. Honestly, he doesn’t understand why we and his mother are roasting))) And how do we let him go to school with "this"?!?!?!))

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №106060
 28.11.2014
A Thai cleaner shot the school’s director.


[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №106059
 28.11.2014
A replacement car. I wanted to send “Call Utenko”, the smart phone corrected “Call Pup”. How to talk to the boss?? to

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №106058
 28.11.2014
Set yourself on a smart app - half an hour before the set time in the alarm is read data from the motion sensor. lying under the pillow, you start to swing - it means that the phase of fast sleep comes, the alarm is working and like you wake up cheerful and cheerful. So now every time I turn to the other side through the dream I think "Don’t call, just don’t call!!". And every time at this point, the cattle starts to bite.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №106057
 28.11.2014
111: Intel promises 10 TB SSDs in two years
222: Something is not believed. Is the price not indicated?
333: 222, two kidneys and liver

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №106056
 28.11.2014
There is a friend, a programmer to the brain of the bones. He recently had "anniversary", 32 years! He not only noted it, but also bought 8 candles, sparked them a number in the cake, and lighted only the sixth! :D

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №106055
 28.11.2014
Oh Tannenbaum is not performed by Rammas, but by the band Unheilig. It was foolish to think of any German industrial as Rammstein.

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