bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №42812
 07.02.2011
Russian tourists refuse to leave rebellious Egypt, because they will have to fly through Domodedovo.

[ + 63 - ] Comment quote №42811
 07.02.2011
Today, once again failing to cope with the insidious turn, I realized that an inexperienced skier is a weapon of mass destruction.

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №42810
 07.02.2011
xxxxxxxxxxx:
say so
Because of the hostility of the environment, I was overwhelmed by a tank

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №42809
 07.02.2011
She says I’m not careful. Yes, I can eat bigmak without putting any salad on the table!

[ + 76 - ] Comment quote №42808
 07.02.2011
I want to hang a map of the world at home and wrap pins in the places I have visited. Only first I will have to come to two places on the edges of the map so that it does not fall off.
c) MitchHeadberg

[ + 63 - ] Comment quote №42807
 07.02.2011
At work, I went to host in one office, where a decent company of ladies gathered. I drink tea, these aunts chew up, run... no matter. An angry boss enters the office and begins to scream to the secretary about the report, the deadlines and so on. One of the aunts nearby decided to calm him and said, “Don’t scream! The nerve cells are not restored!" The angry boss replied:
"I have no nerve cells!"
Here another aunt issued the phrase: “And you know that the brain is made up of nerve cells...”
The roar was heard even on the street.

[ + 58 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №42806
 07.02.2011
To a father who wants to preserve a reputation in the eyes of his son: this knight is called Mameluki))

[ + 83 - ] Comment quote №42805
 07.02.2011
Book of questions to technical support on the provider's website:
Question: What should I do, using the Internet, I brought my mouse to the edge of the carpet, and the cursor did not reach the edge of the screen?
Answer: PNZ subscribers can move the mouse and outside the perimeter of the carpet.

[ + 91 - ] Comment quote №42804
 07.02.2011
Status in contact:
If guys knew what girls were thinking, they would be twenty times more brave.

The first comment:
If girls knew what guys were thinking, they would be twenty times more inaccessible.

(c) KYP_KYRA_o5o

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №42803
 07.02.2011
He was deprived of the fact that, walking on the street, he was obsessively surprised by the spike in the footsteps of the woman.

[ + 72 - ] Comment quote №42802
 07.02.2011
The boss smiled yesterday. On the roof of our store grew ticks, we were called from the administration and told to take measures to avoid accidents. The boss has a tire, and they decided to fix the problem. I say "I will take Lenka at a time, I will put people on the street so that they don’t let go." The boss thought something strange and gave "No, Lenka doesn’t need it. Put a marine. We have two!"
O_O

[ + 62 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №42801
 07.02.2011
What does EEG do to people?

We sit on history, we watch a film about Stalin’s repression. And here on the screen appears lists of names and almost against each - "shoot", "shoot", "shoot". Our faces become serious and concentrated, and almost simultaneously several voices whisper: "With two es, fools!".

[ + 68 - ] Comment quote №42800
 07.02.2011
and Sunny:
"Classmates" - now your wives and mistresses know each other in the face!

by Mr. Laiho:
That’s why I’m not registering.

and Sunny:
Do you have a mistress?? to

[ + 67 - ] Comment quote №42799
 07.02.2011
[1:44:02] HsowMeYouBoobs: Account 3-1! I have won!
[1:44:10] Mai - Otome: How would it be, but not =)
HsowMeYouBoobs: Why?
[1:44:54] Mai – Otome: Well first: Athens is not a state in Egypt.
[1:45:33] Mai - Otome: The invention of Galileo Galilei is not the Rubik Cube
[1:45:58] Mai - Otome: And the natural mineral on the letter K is clearly not Cryptonite.
[1:46:02] Mai – Otome: But since I still hope to spend the evening with you tomorrow, then yes =) You won.

[ + 100 - ] Comment quote №42798
 07.02.2011
I sit in school, I write. There is a characteristic behind me:
The fucking!
After a moment the same voice:
Oh no...

[ + 86 - ] Comment quote №42797
 07.02.2011
And once again in the shelter with the comrade, they stumbled, and the money was scratched only on a bottle of port wine:) and it is shameful to buy it))) we come to the store, the wolfman says - please a bottle of port wine for the teacher)) the seller, showing on normal wines - so can you something more expensive? I rushed - no no no no, you understand the teacher is very strange and asked for the bottle of the cheapest port wine))
The seller understood, smiled, and got a drink. I (dramatic whisper) – do you have glasses? 2 cups for the teacher ?
Two years have passed, he says, he's still there))

[ + 57 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №42796
 07.02.2011
Never drink with your mom, even if this character remains kind.

[ + 54 - ] Comment quote №42795
 07.02.2011
I work in an online store.
i7i7: while dealing with a new site, accidentally put prices on all goods at 1 p.
Chief Executive Officer: Epic Seal (

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №42794
 07.02.2011
The curse of the Aitishnik: Let the wind of the hard rise!

[ + 88 - ] Comment quote №42793
 07.02.2011
Student logic: two pairs a day is a dohuja, and for one and not to go :)

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna