bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №92272
 10.01.2014
Asked Yandex to suggest the road from work to the shopping center - 40 minutes. Then put " with consideration of the block". Yandex thought a little and suggested to walk.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №92271
 10.01.2014
Panda: Most of all I don’t like when the opponent doesn’t play chess as I planned

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №92270
 10.01.2014
Normal education is difficult to get. In the question of understanding this is difficult, and in how the states have grown,and in how the price of electricity is formed. And in the fact that in the east of Russia there is a surplus of generation, at the expense of hydropower plants on the Siberian rivers, in regions where neither population nor industry.
This is one of the most important things in the world.
Well, and explain to me, the poorly educated, why do we have a surplus of generation on DV, and at the same time I pay for electricity not only more Chinese, but also more Moscovites?? to

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №92269
 09.01.2014
Some bananas humiliate my dignity.

[ + 33 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №92268
 09.01.2014
A new shit? ?
The Cultural:
this
to this

<<...yesterday noticed that the cat by the command: "crab!!!" automatically cancels the last movement in space...>>

I have all the dogs and cats know this team very well)))

I am not married in the family.
= the =
Where are you, you are such a shit? Do you ever really get bored?
====== is
Believe it or not, I’m upset, but my wife hasn’t heard of me. I’ve been married for 3.5 years, 5 years.
And yes, I talk to her and sometimes even argue))) And I am not dumb and she is not deaf. I am not a member of the sect.)
I just believe that these are not the words that a loved and loving person should hear. All of.
Bayko

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №92267
 09.01.2014
I have a question here in connection with the laws adopted not so long ago.
So if you tell a child that Santa does not exist, it will be an insult to the feelings of believers?

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №92266
 09.01.2014
On this day, every year, in the morning, always, there are two questions:
1st Where are all these people from?
2nd Why are the roads not cleaned?

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №92265
 09.01.2014
from the local forum (CAPS is prohibited):

I want to delete my account. How to do it?
Fashion: And even this is not a reason to break the rules. A verbal warning.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №92264
 09.01.2014
For two consecutive winters I could not start the car because the bad battery was cut to zero when it was cold below -20. This autumn, I finally bought a cool and expensive gel battery that could be used to get a tank on the frost. I bought it for dollars from Google Ads. In short, forgive me for the ruined winter :((

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №92263
 09.01.2014
Ten years ago, Mikhail Zadornov came to him after a speech in Kiev and threatened to ban him from entering Ukraine, which he loves very much. He replied, “The worst thing would be if you forbade me to leave!”

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №92262
 09.01.2014
Comments on Lobby.
Advantages: Surprisingly lightweight and powerful for its size...
The self-pushing function will clearly cope with raw wood under the rain!
Disadvantages: If you shave at home with the automatic pumping system on, you can spit the neck from your wife.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №92261
 09.01.2014
Why are there no viruses on the iPhone?
YYY: Yes, but they are paid.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №92260
 09.01.2014
From Habr:
In short, the algorithm is approximately this:
The Scientific Committee does not engage students
The Committee on Education does not engage in science
The Committee on Youth Policy does not engage in science or schoolchildren, their tracks are entertainment activities.
4) The Governor sends letters back to the Scientific Committee
Goto 1

[ + 15 - ] Comment quote №92259
 09.01.2014
Talk with Maman about chewing gum in the harsh Soviet childhood.

It was sold for rubles on every corner.
We could only buy them in the moon park.
Specifically, to win...
In a deadly battle.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №92258
 09.01.2014
@DerArto: If you look at the corporate photographs in reverse order, you can see the transformation from a monkey to a human being.

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №92257
 09.01.2014
The Prep, which stumbled on the "Orc Genocide in the works of D. Tolkien and N. Perumov".

If you don’t put it on the net and don’t give it a link, you’ll be cursed!

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №92256
 09.01.2014
to this:
My grandmother was born in 1907.

The Grandmother! Send SMS to a short number and upgrade your TrialBaby to Pro version. And also UltimateBaby in Sale!

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №92255
 09.01.2014
When I was young, I wanted sex almost 24 hours a day, and now, as the eunuchs say, it has been cut off.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №92254
 09.01.2014
Smollla: I have two acquaintances with my own in a quarrel. One husband was not ready for the difficulties of paternity and offered to break up until better times, i.e. From 5 to 7 years old, the second is the opposite. The man wants a child, but cannot conceive. The best taste is that the problem is probably in it.
Let the men change.
Bgggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg
Lena: You’re not going yet?
smollla: Naaain!! I will not have 30 children.
What if you can’t do it later?
Smollla: No meaning
Lena: and then live for what...
The Sims 4 is coming soon.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №92253
 09.01.2014
(On the wall of the scalodrome there are rocks - stones that you climb, and the chamboura - small rings in which carabines are inserted)
I climb a difficult route, and I hit the chambour with my knee (painfully), and I comment down: "Fuck! I’ve pulled my knee!"
Below is a new guy who doesn’t know the terms.
"You are there more accurately with your camembur!", he replies.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna