bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 84 - ] Comment quote №40821
 26.12.2010
I am at home) %
XXX: I didn’t even drink.
XXX: Do you respect me?
Chapter 1: You are burning!

[ + 63 - ] Comment quote №40820
 26.12.2010
A friend shows pictures from Egypt:
– But here’s Murena... They didn’t get closer to swimming so as not to grieve.

[ + 65 - ] Comment quote №40819
 26.12.2010
Anna for a marriage to her. I have been breaking for half a year.

2: Poor.... there is a pissed option, effective, in the Zagse:
Masha (and all of her) you agree to take this individual of unpleasant appearance and intrinsicity into a husband;
and yes;
- and you are an unfamiliar individual, and do not worry, please, demon, you want to take this wretched chocolate-eater into your wives...
Here you are:
-Eyeyee, I am not Odykvad, you beat her (mama from the sting) from her legs, you sing a litre of vodka (if you can pour simple water into a bottle under the vodka), you go to the parents of the bride and sing:"As from my mom's bedroom, the sting was real" you kill from the sting... it would look spectacular, I would be jealous of you))))

[ + 88 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №40818
 26.12.2010
happened to get sick. I camouflage on the bed. My 3-year-old daughter is playing a ball. "I, Alinochka, am sick, I can’t play" – I answer. She understandably sneezes and drags a chair with wheels to the furniture hill, on which all sorts of blunders are displayed. He pulls out of a bunch of barracks the Zenit flag:"On, daddy, hurt me". He sat, waving with a flag while Alina was chasing the ball around the room.

[ + 64 - ] [4 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №40817
 26.12.2010
A friend (P) took her niece to the morning while they were dancing there, she looks at everything and writes to me in ask:
Q: There’s a thick sheep... And a little bearded fairy... with a wing... the second has fallen... There’s another small condom... The parents have no mind.
P: A
A: The Snowman

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №40816
 26.12.2010
We will live long and fuck.
Tagged: happy

[ + 54 - ] Comment quote №40815
 26.12.2010
The girl’s microblog:
A true friend like a whistleblower-close to the heart and always supports :D

Comment of the guy:
Can I be your girlfriend?

[ + 68 - ] Comment quote №40814
 26.12.2010
Katya: No, you understand that I’ll drink a bottle of champagne right now, and I’ll never give it anyway?

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №40813
 26.12.2010
You watched the movie... this... well, like that... about the blue.
Is it a mountainous mountain?
Yes, this is... Avatar!

[ + 83 - ] Comment quote №40812
 26.12.2010
A seller in a store refuses to sell beer to three-year-old guys, not believing that they are 18 years old:
I have a student ticket with me. If you think logically, a student of the third course can not be a minor, since they enter the institute from the age of 17, then the third course should already be 20 years old.
What do you, fool, think of logically?! to

[ + 114 - ] Comment quote №40811
 26.12.2010
I just saw. A man walks with a dog (mops), found a piece of icy road and rides a dog there.
On the face of the dog is frozen astonishment, and the man feels childish enthusiasm!

[ + 87 - ] Comment quote №40810
 26.12.2010
Don’t ask how or why I got to the city landfill, but I found a whole box of blue insulate there, now I will have all things forever :)

[ + 46 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №40809
 26.12.2010
From Pickup Forum:

And where can you go with a girl if you have only your member of all the treasures in the world?! to

[ + 63 - ] Comment quote №40808
 26.12.2010
Kitty came from the kitchen.
I (looking at it): The fat came))
Kotte looked back so suspiciously, like "where is the fat?"

[ + 73 - ] Comment quote №40807
 26.12.2010
Matvijenko offered to clean the snow for motorists, then students and bombs, and then offered to occupy any post in the municipality.
I wait for her to offer the most important thing: People, eat the snow!

[ + 75 - ] Comment quote №40806
 26.12.2010
Artem, how tall are you?
Somewhere 70 meters with a fox!
and 173?

[ + 69 - ] Comment quote №40805
 26.12.2010
My acquaintance came to her friend with her son - Anton, the same son Maxim, Anton 7, Maxim 5, well they played, scattered toys. Aunt came and said:
- Well, clean up the toys, - and go to the kitchen to drink tea, returned, and Anton sits and looks at the cartoons, and Maxim himself cleans everything, Momys ask:
Why do you clean everything yourself? and he:
“Anton said that if I remove everything, I’ll get 50 points,” she looked at her mom, “Mom, what’s the meaning of 50 points?
Mother :
That means you’re bad, son.

[ + 108 - ] Comment quote №40804
 26.12.2010
by Plug13
Are you going on Monday?
Doorknob Thief
I will stay on Sunday. Fuck your Monday.

[ + 80 - ] Comment quote №40803
 26.12.2010
Ingvar: By the way, Mahin and I invented the concept of traveling into the past)))
Caroline: is it okay?
Ingvar: It comes from the Big Bang Theory. Do you know about anti-matter?
Caroline: I am not sure.
Ingvar: In general, in short, the Big Bang is cyclical, like the Mobius loop. The center of space-time is its epicenter. Accordingly, like the loop, the explosion (or more accurately the universe) has 2 twists. One in the positive part of the Descartes system of coordinates (expressed figuratively), the other in the negative. The point is that the negative twist (Anti-Universe) consists entirely of anti-matter and most likely has countermotive properties. And the fact that anti-matter is possible in our version of the universe also suggests the possibility of re-existence. That is, if we understand the mechanism of the formation of antimatter (and this is possible already in the process), then we will be able to transfer our matter to the negative loop of the loop, wire it along the countermotive stream and make its reverse transition in the past of our loop. The trick is that the traveler in time will evenly scatter the universe from anti-matter. Is it really funny?))
I just wrote all this and realized that the joke will probably seem ridiculous to you.
Caroline is a joke?

[ + 76 - ] Comment quote №40802
 26.12.2010
I’ve seen a lot of strange things in the mornings with Santa Claus and Snow White, but the phrase Snow White “Who doesn’t dance is Philip Kirkorov!” killed me.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna