bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 66 - ] Comment quote №41972
 20.01.2011
From the book of T. Gagin "The Achievement"

One of our acquaintances had been engaged in mountain climbing for a long time, he told us how they once spoke about the meaning of life with all the climbing - they ate a dune with a silk before climbing, and they caught it right on the rock. People from above, people from below, all ate dune with silk. You’re tied to a rock and you know what’s important in life.

[ + 49 - ] Comment quote №41971
 20.01.2011
(Status) [#Fre@ky#]
>> I think if you feed a goat with a gangbang, it will be roasted with mixers :-D

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №41970
 20.01.2011
Cat: The shortest horror story?
Arven ES: Let’s Go
CAT: The last person on the ground was sitting in the room. They knocked on the door.
Arven ES: ' Lie, shit and provocation' - thought man.

[ + 93 - ] Comment quote №41969
 20.01.2011
I am so lonely with my life.
How did you get back to this topic?
I can come back to her from anywhere. Say the word!
Tagged with: bacon
HGH: Baklažan is a vegetable. My uncle became a vegetable when he was hit by a truck. Truck drives beer. Beer comes in the 40s. I am forty, what about my life?! to

[ + 68 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №41968
 20.01.2011
Fuck, my friend has changed 5 guys in the last six months.
xxx: a status "love, you are the best in the world!" in contact has not been updated for 207 days =))))

[ + 62 - ] Comment quote №41967
 20.01.2011
She: By the way, did you know that in a liter of beer is the daily dose of female hormones?
You and I are lesbians ?

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №41966
 20.01.2011
I want a plugin that will hide alcohol and cigarettes :(
There is such a plugin, the wife is called.

[ + 56 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №41965
 20.01.2011
The healing properties of baptism water come down to it from space. Such an unexpected statement was made by Russian biophysicists.

Speak to British scientists.

[ + 76 - ] Comment quote №41964
 20.01.2011
Hi, we are registering! Congratulations on registration. Now you have full access to educational materials.

[ + 70 - ] Comment quote №41963
 20.01.2011
xxx: today I went to form a contract with the company ooo "necropolis"...proposed to change the wording of "gen.director" to "supreme person";

[ + 86 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №41962
 20.01.2011
Alice: Give it up, and I once walked around the city with a tail.
He was in the package.
Alice: I was scared to go to the store at 10 p.m. and I took a tail for the chance.

[ + 92 - ] Comment quote №41961
 20.01.2011
History of Aska

My cat barely eaten the printer :)
B is?? to
a - She's in my printer sleeps often, I didn't notice and turned it on the print :)))
B is lol
A – I have a cat.
Within 40 minutes the printer of wool cleaned up :)
B is ?
The cat is in shock :)))
The printer too ;)
A – I too
The printing
I hear the thunder and wild cat cries :)))
B – What is your printer?
The Xerox 3150
A - that the cat in it all accommodate
In short, she was lying where the paper goes out with the ass to the rolls that roll out the paper, well you understand, the printer turned on and the wool on the ass fell into these rolls.
B is lol

A – and then:
The Cat - Meyawau
Printer - crrkhchststststprr
I am Yamanarot, what for us.
LOL

[ + 75 - ] Comment quote №41960
 20.01.2011
A letter to the vendor from a system integrator about a failing project:

Dear Mr Barsukov!

In December last year, when you infused your glucose stinking XXX (soft name),
You were willing to say that his Slavic local will be presented to the honest people no later than the end of the winter.
The winter has passed, a new one has begun. We were in Siberia with snow on the tomatoes, but unfortunately, the presence of proper sandwiches and a warm body of nihua does not warm my angry soul. Localized as there was, and not. My partner is fucking with your supostatic craft like Ilya Muromets with the Snake Gorinich. He also called your men to help, but they sent his men to help, saying, “You will be blessed if you speak in our way.”
Barsucci to go! If you are scornful, you will not present me with a letter signed by your Master, which will tell me when the happiness of the acquisition of locals will enter my house, and you will not send me your hoodies, in order to soothe me from December this year, until December next, I will be angry with you and begin to avenge.
First, I will burn all the scrolls on which your work is printed. Furthermore, I publicly admit that we did not have a good cooperation with you. I will tell all the honest Siberian people, who manufacture wood and black gold, that you have snugged with the devil and you cannot be taken as companions in God-pleasing affairs.

[ + 66 - ] Comment quote №41959
 20.01.2011
Natasha Newarley: My blind man learned somewhere that vitamin C dies at a temperature of +60 degrees Celsius; that is, drinking hot tea with lemon is useless.
Natasha: Now he puts a lemon in a hot tea and waits for it to cool.
NatashaNeWarley: I sincerely believe that vitamins in cold water will revive)))

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №41958
 20.01.2011
"The less the curves, the longer the road.“Ivory Shirt”

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №41957
 20.01.2011
I read an old story about professional reflexes here and remembered my own.
In the cardiology of the mud was regularly placed a well-cultured lady of noble blood. Madam walked through the department in a silk strap coat with brushes on the belt and a chimney under her throat, demonstrating in all her appearance a grand etiket and tolerance for the surrounding bead.
My favourite topic for conversations were undermined nerves and a weak heart due again to the dullness of the surrounding reality. And the main feature - and the medical complaint - the ladies were fainting. I have to say that she imitated them quite skillfully, but burned on some theatricality and the fact that the injection of sterile water or phys. The solution in the form of a medication (necessarily in the presence of a doctor) always brought it into itself.
To get rid of this conservative prostitute, doctors did not dare to guess. They were placed in the department on the orders of the head. Doctor, and just silently sataneli. It is very inspiring, you know, when, after a night service or on the way to a really severe heart attack, you are intercepted for another fainting misanthropy and a subsequent half-hour lecture on the spiritual impoverishment of modern youth, who in opera and ceramics understand like a flock of pigs in oranges.
And one blessed day, the stars for this esthetic lady fell with cancer: first, she was prescribed an antibiotic for a slight bronchitis, and secondly, a sick duty honey. The sister was replaced by a colleague from pulmonology - a rough hundred-pound siberia, hardened by a drinking husband and deceased asthmatics with a variety of allergies to everything.
Appreciating the importance of the moment (the antibiotic still kneels!The lady decided to qualitatively demonstrate her favorite reception, but... honey. No one warned my sister about this benefit. And the admirer of all the grace instead of the expected phenomenon of the doctor and 5 ml of water in the vein received two unshakable spheres and a full set of emergency measures in anaphylactic shock, because she did not think to wake up quickly after the cracks, but, on the contrary, pulled out her eyes and shrieked from such a screaming greed.
The doctor stumbled upon an adrenaline, prednisolone, etc. amateur of fainting with a fist in her hand, two droplets in different veins, and a fierce aunt hanging over her body with a ready tongue holder and a bag.
Ambo...
In short, such shock therapy did not cause any harm other than benefits: fainting disappeared overnight, bronchitis dissolved itself, the patient immediately felt so well that he was discharged as soon as possible.
and honey. Without any joke, the sister was awarded a prize for timely and competent emergency assistance. It is better to be overwhelmed than a body on conscience.

[ + 47 - ] Comment quote №41956
 20.01.2011
New punishment for Russian officials: Strict presidential speech on Twitter with a post on Facebook.

[ + 93 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №41955
 20.01.2011
by 111:
Can you reinstall the computer?

by 222 :
The wind?

by 222 :
Or from place to place?? to

[ + 61 - ] Comment quote №41954
 20.01.2011
How much can I get a tattoo?
YYY: for 2.5 thousand and more
Can you buy anything for 500 rubles?
YYY : of course! "Style "

[ + 65 - ] Comment quote №41953
 20.01.2011
Omsk beauties entertain the public with filigran possession of mohnatka (c) Tvaltvadze during the hockey match today

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