bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 79 - ] Comment quote №41612
 13.01.2011
The promised Lukashenko century awaits
Xxx : Oh
In the sense, Lukashenko said – Lukashenko did!
YYY: It’s too late for you to leave.
zzz: she whispered when she got a speck between her eyes
YYY: Ohha... and wrote for her OMONOVEC

[ + 91 - ] Comment quote №41611
 13.01.2011
The son assembled (with magazines sold) a plastic skeleton. The grandfather enters his room - the grandson is sitting, the skeleton is sitting on the opposite chair."Meet, grandfather, it is Artem". My grandfather’s glasses fell. Then my son decided to make the movie. Entering the room with the skeleton:"A body has been found here, you need to look for evidence". He goes to another room, where the telephone is on. Advertising of the series "The Scale".
There is no evidence here.
A criminal always leaves evidence.
Let’s go to another room, we have to find out.
Who killed Muradov?

Grandfather:"Now we and the name of Arthoma know".

[ + 69 - ] Comment quote №41610
 13.01.2011
How can you take a person who has a bigger head seriously?

[ + 71 - ] Comment quote №41609
 13.01.2011
Vanilla Mouse(18:14:44 12/01/2011)
You know that there are sometimes bonuses due to 2 forks, etc.
Vanilla Mouse(18:15:26 12/01/2011)
I just caught MEGOBONUS 2 spices, 2 bags with "vegetables" and blatant TRIES forks
Cactus (18:15:55 12/01/2011)
:D
Cactus (18:16:09 12/01/2011)
You are happier than ever.

[ + 90 - ] Comment quote №41608
 13.01.2011
The author of this:
"It is uncomfortable to fuck with princes - the horse interferes."

Kham... I don’t want to upset you, but the real prince, entering the room, takes off the horse.

[ + 62 - ] Comment quote №41607
 13.01.2011
Didn't you notice when girls wear bags on their curved hands, on their legs, and under their feet snowflakes, they become like crabs?

[ + 65 - ] Comment quote №41606
 13.01.2011
If you enter the word in Google, it will highlight "the most beautiful girl in the world", and if the word is "the richest man in the world".
Our world is very simple.

[ + 89 - ] Comment quote №41605
 13.01.2011
One of them is: Pizzac. Birthday was such a joyful and happy holiday. With balls and candy... Now the birthday is the purposelessly drunken thousands of rubles in company with friends and the damned wall of VKontakte...

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №41604
 13.01.2011
Oh, that physics...I’m too young for physics!

[ + 38 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №41603
 13.01.2011
I love my country, but I do not like the country we live in.

[ + 37 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №41602
 13.01.2011
The wallet

Gathered before Christmas at the wholesale market. New Year’s stocks are approaching at the end. On the central alley on the ground the wallet lies. and thick.
Nearby sellers pretend they don’t notice. They do not want to get involved in this matter.
Went in the nineties. I even felt some nostalgia. The cowboys have long since either opened their legal business, or mastered the Internet.
There are still dinosaurs alive.
If I were younger, I would pick up my wallet. I love guiding lost souls on the path of truth. But with age, the desire for adventure weakens. He went where he went.
Looking back, he still lies. Sure, it is somewhere else and a bit thicker, but the same.
You cannot tempt a man! I pulled my wallet with my foot. It smoothly slides on the ice and flies five meters into the gap under the commercial container (the container stands on two long concrete slopes, between which I pulled the shale).
Here comes the main actor. You...It’s...What...From excitement forgetting that by the script he’s not the owner of the wallet, but a simple passenger with whom you need to share content.
“Well you imagine,” I said to him, “thought, empty. Run fast behind the lifting crane. I’ll come in an hour and share in half.”

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №41601
 13.01.2011
Why don’t you shave?
I don’t have a girl for whom I’d like to shave.
And for myself?
I buy beer for myself.

[ + 83 - ] Comment quote №41600
 13.01.2011
In Tel Aviv, in a line to an app store, a man was standing behind a man who was going to buy a box for his MacBook. Close to the box he heard him quietly and gently say to MacBook: "Well, Igor, we'll buy you a coat now."

[ + 60 - ] Comment quote №41599
 13.01.2011
Dmitry Kazantsev (21:45) :
Interesting version: a hillsman killed the pension fund because he had a debt

Nikita Ivanovich (21:46) :
Duncan McLeod ruins Scottish pension fund

Dmitry Kazantsev (21:47) :
Everybody has gone without pants.

Nikita Ivanovich (21:48) :
It is ?

[ + 68 - ] Comment quote №41598
 13.01.2011
Today I saw Rasta-Emo for the first time.
XH: such with dredds and cloth
He probably smokes grass and cries.

[ + 99 - ] Comment quote №41597
 13.01.2011
I had a quarrel with his mother.
Q: Did you say it again?
She says to me: Ir, go eat, see what I have prepared.
xxxh: opens the strap, and there is a goose, so roasted that the meat from the bones has slipped and such wings are ripped out of the bouillon.
I’m going to fuck: mmm! The German! The pterodactyl!

[ + 70 - ] Comment quote №41596
 13.01.2011
from ZH:

There is a special clown unit in the Mexican police. It works mainly in schools. Well, so that children are not mentally traumatized and even somehow entertained if possible. A few days ago, the children of this unit were caught in one of the school thieves. Funny so they were chased after them, drowned on the ground, joyfully beat the kidneys. In general, the kids liked it.

[ + 55 - ] Comment quote №41595
 13.01.2011
He: yes you right man should earn, and woman to maintain the focal)))))))you have a smart girl)

She: I have a man.

[ + 84 - ] Comment quote №41594
 13.01.2011
I call the homephone.
who?
I am
Who is "I"
Fuck it didn’t work...

[ + 57 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №41593
 13.01.2011
News on the tape:
British police took sea pigs for marijuana
British scientists, British scientists...

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna