bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 47 - ] Comment quote №58533
 12.01.2012
nuckie
I got a trimmer for the beard Valera.

nuckie
Now I can’t stand, and when the beard grows, I say, “Waler, it’s your time.”

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №58532
 12.01.2012
I’m like an old nokia: I just need my mom =(

[ + 45 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №58531
 12.01.2012
The peak of optimism in childhood was when playing races on Dendy, we together with the joystick bended the body towards the turn))))))))))

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №58530
 12.01.2012
XXX: 2 January Despite the weekend, I had to work. And here I am going to the stop early in the morning. It’s still dark, and I’m pretty sleepy, I’m almost on the machine. I go to the shop to buy cigarettes. Next to the lark are two pretty drunk boys aged 20-22. I automatically say to the saleswoman in the barbecue: "Good evening!"" One of the guys noticeably revives and pushes the other: "I told you — evening!"

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №58529
 12.01.2012
I looked at a photo of a 18-year-old woman. The first thought - "To blow up..."

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №58528
 12.01.2012
You want to be tough.
The unprincipled...
HH: No obligation to anything...
The disc?

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №58527
 12.01.2012
From corporate chat:
Helena: it’s like a member in front of your eyes)) pleasant to the eye and raising feelings)
Sergey Dmitrievich: believe it or not, but the member in front of my eyes does not cause joy
Sergey Dmitrievich: and his proximity even scares him!
You like to have it.)
Sergey Dmitrievich: but at the same time he is at a safe distance
Sergey Dmitrievich: and he is his!

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №58526
 12.01.2012
Did you know that a person loses 150 calories per hour by hitting his head against a wall?
This is my dream diet!

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №58525
 12.01.2012
Michael, let me go.
Working
Ivan goes on!! Not strongly
and work)
Tomorrow I will sleep.
Ivan, what is a celebration?
Michael the Holy Day
idylically


[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №58524
 12.01.2012
XXX: What do you do at all? Pacha, I sometimes think that our conversation looks like this: -Pacha is delicious? Seven camels flew out to rest. Fuck, I don’t understand you 😉

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №58523
 12.01.2012
Meanwhile, the office is still engaged in monitoring and consideration of fuel consumption. The customer calls says - your niche does not show fuel consumption. People are leaving us to watch. They call and talk, they’re just shit guys. I come and look at this device. Diesel is a monster. There is no battery. Remove the belt from the generator. What they do. In the morning, they drop him from the mountains. He works with them all day. There is no electricity in the car. Sensors do not ask for spending not to track and movements too. Olo

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №58522
 12.01.2012
In front of me is a man (M), buying a healing box of Ferrero Roche, a bottle of expensive champagne and a pack of condoms. The box on the box (B) is classic:
B: Do you need a package?
M: Yes please
The maid sows him a thin maid. The scene is silent: he looks closely at her, she looks at him, he looks at her, she looks at him.
M: Girl, do you have untransparent bags?

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №58521
 12.01.2012
Well, to paint or play music, you need to have at least a little male predisposition. And when I had an elephant on the ear - the fox broke all the pencil at once)))

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №58520
 12.01.2012
The fucking!! I have a chicken!!! to
I will drive the cat away.

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №58519
 12.01.2012
I decided that it was necessary to drop out of the corporation at work when the chief engineer began to paint with a pen on the champagne trap and thoughtfully put the stamp on the towels.

[ + 42 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №58518
 12.01.2012
There is communication on various topics, and in the course of the case, the mother of a friend proudly issues:
And our Dima can move its ears!
Reaction of his father
It would be better if he had learned to move his brain.

Curtains on the floor.

[ + 70 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №58517
 12.01.2012
I lost my rights... what to do?? to

1st Go to the fool, get the certificate.
2nd Go to the pharmacy and get a certificate.
Three Go to the clinic and cross these two certificates there with a photo - you will get a medical examination.
4 is Take copies of the ID card and RNN, cross them with the medical examination - a package of documents will be obtained
5 is Go to Gai - find the right person
6 is It will help you pump a package of documents to the level of temporary rights, for a bag of money.
7 is Then you wait a month, go to GAI again... and you cross the temporary rights there with another photo.

And here you have in your hands again an artefact allowing you to subordinate the means of transportation!!! to
Congratulations, you have pumped up to the level of the lead!!! to

My life is a game online.
World of Lifecraft

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №58516
 12.01.2012
xxx: Listen, I finally got your sexual concerns. You can’t talk or think about anything else. Enough is enough! We are no longer a couple. Let us remain friends!
The guy:
How do you feel about sex with friends?

[ + 60 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №58515
 12.01.2012
Darksol: is there soon the end of the world? You are already 6...

[ + 62 - ] Comment quote №58514
 12.01.2012
Recently, I read the Psalms of the dead all night.
The resting grandmother, in addition to the children, was also reading her baptist and her grandson - both real puppies.
I know the first three caphisms almost by the mouth. So I read them at a very high speed, monotonously, without expression, in the same rhythm and pace.
And here, after the third caffism, I sat down to rest and drink coffee, so I didn’t want to sleep. Her baptist, Pasha, approaches me and says:
This is the kind of compliment I wanted to say to you.
I was a little stressed:
And what happened?
And he continues:
- No, you really could read rap quickly, "Casta" didn't even roll around.

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