Some people have sex exclusively through the brain.
This is most often rape.

Mom held a lecture for my sister (5 years old child) about what you need to be polite... well there to say thank you, please, hello, etc. In 10 minutes. Mean system asks for water...I bring.
Mother Sister: What Should I Say?
Don’t go away, take the glass!

Mur_myau: The cat has invented a new entertainment. The lap touches one of the extreme bottles on the shelf and with interest observes the domino effect. >_<

I’m looking at the cartoons, I don’t understand why Carlson has four fingers.
Do you think if you had a carnivore behind your back since childhood? The back swells!

I am terrified of our universe...Today, half a pair of programming (!) We discussed with the predead how fast to run to kill the wall.

Dialogue on Friday the 13th.
Where are your shabies this year?
Girl: Relax, we have refused to sacrifice virgins.

Everyone in the company was given Oxolin. At first pleased. Then they read that there is 99.5% vaseline. Now we are discussing whether we are going to be treated or not.

I fled from my country.
We put a tank alia monument which is naturally deactivated and does not work. It lasted for six months and disappeared. Three days later they were returned to place. Everybody scratched the tail for a long time - whatever it was. Then I learn from a friend that it was he and his company that made this tank at night for six months and went to ride on it. However, my first thought was – which I was not invited. O O O O O O O O

Stone to an anecdote about Malakhov, which during his conception was protected by a traveler:

master_dell: And when conceiving Nikolai Valuev - spinach, as far as Timati is concerned - just the parents thought that during anal sex you should not be protected... no, deceived nature!

xxx: Prep of the fire of the wool, grit "you know, I was nicknamed by the students on the forum", we typically "why?", grit "written that I am a quiet quiet, and then I do not cry out")))

If people had computer viruses!
YYY: Oh, you won’t believe it...

If you were first drunk with friends on a Friday in a student dormitory and said that you would like to go home to your parents for the weekend, and then got drunk to memory, don't be surprised to wake up, instead of your native bed, on the third shelf of a common railway car in a stall in a completely different city without a penny money five hundred kilometers from home. This is how your friends took care of you... well, how can you...

xxx: Here’s what everyone says: “Fu, he’s an elephant of the 80th level,” they’re ashamed of them, they’re mocked. In those moments, I’m getting quiet – I’m still 52...

The early autumn. The Park.
A mother with a child, three students and a storyteller.
Students are two guys who are flirting with a very cute girl. It was a little more frank than it should be, an office costume.
In front of them comes exactly this same mother, dragging a 6-year-old child behind. Mamasha is a representative of such a... refined working class, which is usually used in the masses by Americans when making films about Russia.

When two companies pass by each other, a woman with a shade of nausea looks at the passing fun young people, begins to whistle something under her nose.
The child is listening to her, listening, then sharply turning, looking at the girl and with a ringing voice says:

Mom, who is that crazy?

In the fruits of education begins the worm of doubt.

The discussion about how our ancestors fought, badly or well, in the WOW is endless.
Certainly, if you have an intelligent commander, your chances of surviving are good, and with a fool all. A long time ago, my uncle’s companion described his company as being strengthened by “strangers” (ch. ~200), they dropped a hole in our defense in the r-n of Krivogorh. The task was to keep "to the last drop of blood" the only road that German tanks could use. The tanks stop and die - grace!
The row was pressed to the place, loaded almost a whole "half Tuesday" of anti-tank grenades, said that the tanks will probably come a lot tomorrow and left. They had less than a day to live. No other anti-tank weapons were provided.
The commander inspected the area and ordered:
"It's a shame, people come to visit us from Germany, and our road is so broken." “I’m probably scared,” many thought. The commander continued, "Treat everyone out of the stuff and after me." The company went to the nearest sludge hill of the road, from some metal factory nearby. The commander forced to pick up in sacks and carry to the fill. On the road itself, the straw fell unevenly, more there where the road into the straw goes. “Let them be few,” the commander knocked. The shrapnel lasted for a very long time, all the bags were broken up into the scissors, the scratches were melted to the slices. We slept about two kilometers of road. The people are wicked and tired, now they are still at noon. In the morning, a signal came from the shale: “I see tanks.”
Compressing their almost useless grenades, the soldiers knew that life was over. Finally, the tanks began to enter the "organized" road.
The third tank of the column lost the hose first, and a minute later this epidemic spread to the remaining cars, numbering eight. A standing tank, if it is not angry, is not dangerous. Not quite understood, you were given, the Germans defeated and the tank evacuator. The German infantry is not bad, it will not go forward without tanks. Our “for Stalin” rushing on them, too, has no reason.
The commander, who has formally performed the combat task - to stop the tanks, sends the rider to find any chief and pass - "The task is accomplished. There is no loss.” Goetz brought the good news - "At night you can leave, there is a defense behind. There will be a chance, then we will cover with artillery."
The secret of the commander in his education is the technique of cold processing of metals. Nickel shakes are waste of metallurgy, a terrible abrasive, only slightly inferior to corundum and aluminum oxide. No fingers of goats will withstand bullying with such shit, and what is pleasant is that the goat becomes useless entirely, taking with it most of the drive.

I have two stripes...
Are you pregnant?
No, I’m a bullshit!! to

The site discusses the case with Ferrari - the car broke the wheel at a speed of 180 km / h.
One of the comments:
I had the same situation. He drove on Zaporozhye - 280 km / h, the front wheel broke, went to the meeting, entered the concrete fence, passed through it and the speed went out. Thank God the safety pillow worked when he then struck the stone. That's because of him that the bumper -prooost in the clutches and had to sweat more cosmetics to do.

The dialogue:

Will you go to the buyer?
to hunt?

I was given a toy on which I could write words.
YYY: And what then?
xxx: So in the morning I woke up and almost got mad when the bear said to me, “Stop whipping, go to work.”