bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 75 - ] Comment quote №22418
 12.11.2009
Nick (w/Jabber): I came up with a punishment for the M$ sheep who invented the “Hide Extensions.”
Nick (w/Jabber): Paraffine the nostrils and place the same shaped shit and chocolate in front of it.
Nick (w/Jabber): And what he caught must be eaten to the end.

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №22417
 12.11.2009
Did you know that cats mock only for humans?
She is: not true! Cats mock when they are roasted.
I :...

[ + 62 - ] Comment quote №22416
 12.11.2009
Garden knives
Semac called his daughter Barcelona. Barcelona Sergeevna Semak

Yandex
fucking

Yandex
His head is better not to play anymore.

[ + 76 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №22415
 12.11.2009
Jürgen (15:23:26 11/11/2009)
Chinese scientists from the Institute of Paleontology of the University of Beijing under the leadership of Professor Changzhou Jin concluded that the intelligent man did not originate in Africa, but in China.

Thunderstorms (15:23:44 11/11/2009)
I think the Ukrainian comrades will deny them.

[ + 103 - ] Comment quote №22414
 12.11.2009
Scraped by:

- You heard, a decree was issued on the revival of the Institute of Regimental Capellans. Now there will be a moving church at each part.
There is a mosque in every part. For the Muslims.
- Aaga, and a moving dacan - for Buddhists.
- Ah, and for atheists - a mobile strip bar, with blackjack and prostitutes.

[ + 93 - ] Comment quote №22413
 12.11.2009
The child is sick. My husband comes from work:
Did the doctor come?
Yes, it was recently...
And what said? Is there a chance to do it or is there a chance to cure it?

[ + 62 - ] Comment quote №22412
 12.11.2009
RCX ‎(22:56): I do a typical by Terver, task:
The box contains 15 parts, of which 5 are married (33% are married!). The compiler extracted 3 details..."
Fuck, as it is familiar to the pain, this is how we car collects, only the phrases "are missing "and with closed eyes turns them into the chosen place".
by Rain (23:04)
It is bad to laugh at the poor.

[ + 92 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №22411
 12.11.2009
When I was a kid and watched "Well, guess!", I was always a cute wolf. But I didn’t hate the rabbit at the same time, I just wanted the wolf to stop stumbling and stumbling on this disgustingly polite and frightening rodent.
But when I watched "Tom and Jerry," I always wanted the evil, evil mouse creature to be finally eaten, but the cat, though rather aggressive in some places, did not cause any negativity. The tweet about the bird twitty appeared when I didn’t watch them enough, but the effect was the same: well, I really want a small, caring sickness to be eaten by the hammered, but reckless Sylvester.
Interestingly, I don’t know anyone who would think differently.
Here and think then what lesson the affars of the multicolors wanted to teach.

[ + 77 - ] Comment quote №22410
 12.11.2009
She: Set me my account!
He said, “Do you have no hands?
Why do I have my hands if I have a husband?! to
Why do I have a wife when I have a hand?

[ + 97 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №22409
 12.11.2009
History of Spam:
1st Initially, it was proposed to increase the
2nd After the idea of the whole world has increased it (even those who do not have it) came porn sites for this member to learn how to use it.
Three Then all kinds of prostitutes began to knock to try this member like on the battlefield.
4 is When by the idea you still found a girl on this member are offered to read her SMS or if she found a bigger member...

[ + 89 - ] Comment quote №22408
 12.11.2009
Pythagore's pants are equal on all sides.
WOUW: In the Onotoleja vest weathers the stopping disk

[ + 125 - ] Comment quote №22407
 12.11.2009
We sit on a pair on philosophy, we write down some worldview questions, the prede (woman) conducts a dialogue with us, writing down the first question, begins about the following:
Imagine the primitive man who killed a mammoth, ate, set fire in the cave, went out and looked up at the sky, the stars, what do you think he thought?
Group - what is there?and :)
Prepod - well, this would be thought by the primitive man, but what would a man of the 21st century think?
The same group - what am I doing in the cave??? O_O

It even hurt afterwards :)

[ + 103 - ] Comment quote №22406
 12.11.2009
It is about disassembling the cartridge for the Canon copier.
XXX: It is as if it was made to build the human race: "What, fox, is just two hands?"?" and

[ + 49 - ] Comment quote №22405
 12.11.2009
Protocol of the Department Meeting
About the new wage system.
They decided to reconcile.

[ + 86 - ] Comment quote №22404
 12.11.2009
From the car website:

Help the guys! I urgently need 4 Mini Cooper cars with a personal driver!!! to
Will you ride an elephant on rolls?

[ + 101 - ] Comment quote №22403
 12.11.2009
Leo: In short, I am sitting now in the room, I hear the neighbor's door opened, I look into the corridor, I hear him in the toilet, I went to him in the room (light is turned off) and under the bed went down )) He comes, goes to bed, and I pull out my hand from under the bed and catch his leg )) Yopt, such a scream "My God!" I haven't heard it for a long time )
Glad he went to the bathroom before that ?

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №22402
 12.11.2009
It is not difficult to find one of a thousand, it is difficult to find one of a thousand.

[ + 52 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №22401
 12.11.2009
In our village, a father of a large family went to the city for business and bought toys to five children - a gun, a machine, a machine, etc.
Naturally, a dispute broke out - who gets what - scream, noise, gam.
Tired of the noise, buy them the same toys the next time.
On the next arrival from the city, my father brought five perfectly identical, beautiful, magnificent BRAbanos!

[ + 75 - ] Comment quote №22400
 12.11.2009
Lectures on Philosophy. The Prep:
No science can make a man happy.
A voice from the audience:
Apart from chemistry.

[ + 87 - ] Comment quote №22399
 12.11.2009
I come from work, tired, though of silence and peace.

In the kitchen, the mommy is cooking, the TV is unrealistic.
I’m sure she didn’t hear me come.
I have a topic to talk, I go to the kitchen, I take the controller, I am going to silence...
Mom, without turning around and screaming the TV:
It doesn’t work louder, I’ve already tried it!

I forgot what I wanted to talk about...

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