bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №135581
 04.11.2016
our JEC perfectly mastered the skill "snow cleaning in the neighboring yard";

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №135580
 04.11.2016
Because the new MacBook does not have USB:

XXX: I am, of course, a man not young, everybody has seen. This is what I will tell you, guys. When the mobile phones just appeared, one man was selling them. He had all four of them in use and he was constantly talking to someone at the clients. For a demonstration, so to speak. And then he got a brain tumor and tried with the manufacturer company. And now the question: is it so good that the world is increasingly saturated with high-frequency radiation and is it not better in most situations to use cables, connectors, etc.? Or let’s say that the cockroaches in our houses almost didn’t get somewhere right after 2000, why would that be?

ZZZ: I, as a person even older and sloppy, will say more – all the tight wires and electrification – passion as dangerous! In our 20s, GOELRO conducted electrification, so one man hit the wire and killed its current! There have also been no bugs in our houses since then. So it is better to write all the info on paper, and even better - on the barrel - it is without chemistry.


[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №135579
 04.11.2016
I found out that Olya kept the sweater in the stack and I was in the stack.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №135578
 04.11.2016
And my surgeon very much liked my blind intestine, so admired, so admired, no words. As in a textbook, he said. Therefore, if I don’t look very good, I always remind myself that I have a magnificent blind bowel. What matters is not what’s outside, but what’s inside.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №135577
 04.11.2016
Today I went to the store for vegetable oil, didn’t take the phone and came back in an hour with a little because I watched the excavator dig a pit-hot really since childhood hadn’t seen this exciting spectacle)

My wife, after a slight pitch, told me that I now have the full right to write a letter to Santa and ask for a gift.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №135576
 04.11.2016
My husband and I are in the car, the window on my side is open. I cut my hair to

and intertwined.

M: Is it so from you?

I : What? O_O

M: Well, such a hernia is pleasant.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №135575
 04.11.2016
We drive with my wife through Lotoshino in a car, we drive on the entrance of a cardboard layout of DPS-nik, a type of speed measurement. Then closer to the center we pass the second, then the third. I tell my wife - look, work, stand in the snow. The state understood that it was more profitable than keeping the real ones. And she answers - soon in the clinics the same doctors will be...

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №135574
 04.11.2016
The technology is becoming more and more, the technique is becoming more sophisticated and smarter, and man must become smarter with it. Because when a person’s mental abilities do not meet the requirements of technology, one of them becomes useless.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №135573
 03.11.2016
They make such a curved product that even before their tech support finally came that frequent customer appeals about problems in specific browsers is not a coincidence.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №135572
 03.11.2016
Advertising is %gamename%.
An ambitious MMORPG game in which you can do anything.
The age rating is 12+.
XXX is lying. Everything can only be done with 18+... And even there isn’t everything!

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №135571
 03.11.2016
Dear passenger! We carefully read your valuable opinion!
>>>>>>>>
Dear manufacturers of subway cars, when you test the air conditioners (and you clearly test the cars on pigs because there are always livestock carriages) - put on pigs and put a thermometer in the butt to finally understand that your condoms don't work and if you wear something warmer than winds (in the winter, for example, unexpectedly, right?) Then the testers will float on top of it, and the windows will not be opened.

Happy passenger of the Moscow subway, Tagansko-Krasno-Presnensk line
<<<<<<<

We are pleased to inform you that we have listened to you and resolved the problem!
We no longer install air conditioners in subway cars. Thanks for your recall!

[ + 35 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №135570
 03.11.2016
Are we in the Stone Age?
xx: there should be a “do it” button
yy: guy, we are on the side that makes these buttons

[ + 26 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №135569
 03.11.2016
I don’t understand this touching concern about drug addicts. Let it all happen. This is a real biosphere. What does it take to be degenerate to start taking? If you have begun, go now, stumble and die. Because of them, even sedatives allowed ten years ago cannot be bought without a prescription. And it is not necessary to talk about the "submitted" and "forcibly struck". If you were forcibly injected, run from all feet to be treated, and you will go down at all without any problems. Problems only those who sit long and tight.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №135568
 03.11.2016
Who confesses that you are disgusted?
But pornography statistics, until it was blocked, were very indicative.
and /
Baby, you will be surprised, but watching porn and sexual practices do not correlate at all. A bunch of people watch the BDSM orgia, and sleep only with their wife and only in the missionary.
But an anonymous interview on "Practices", both domestic and sexual in regional AIDS centers, has been laid off.
The incentive is simple – do you want to get free therapy? Fill out the questionnaire. No age, only gender. They fill up nothing. Yes, and the main source of distribution is heroin drug addicts, "processing" in one place and their clients, preferring "this" without rubber. This is a long-known fact in Russian social medicine. known to everyone, except for the deputies of the State Dura and here are such screams on the Internet - "ah, because of the pedics the country will die!". The country of heroin will die. No one can close the border with Central Asia. Stop the gay propaganda. Economy of S.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №135567
 03.11.2016
Famous Russian singer Philip Kirkorov, who has not once became a figure of loud scandals, again "differentiated": witnesses shot on the video, how the artist during the concert hit a fan, possibly in a drunk state.
People!! Who in a sober mind goes to his concerts? Reply to

[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №135566
 03.11.2016
Dear manufacturers of subway cars, when you test the air conditioners (and you clearly test the cars on pigs because there are always livestock carriages) - put on pigs and put a thermometer in your ass to finally understand that your condoms don't work and if you wear something warmer than winds (in winter, for example, unexpectedly, right?) Then the testers will float on top of it, and the windows will not be opened.

The happy passenger of the Moscow metro, Tagansko-Krasno-Presnensk line

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №135565
 03.11.2016
Have you tried to sneeze when you write?
I am :?? to
So I cleaned up for myself.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №135564
 03.11.2016
I correctly kept silent for the first two weeks, then told her to look into her plate, and not into mine, and finally dropped away from me! She’s offended and now tells the whole office that I’m a terrible bullshit and hamlo, and that’s because I’m a meat-eater, but they’re all, vegetarians and vegans are the best people.

Generally speaking, people tend to think of everyone around them as hamas except themselves. Aunt calling on the phone calls Hamam those who ask them to speak quietly. People cutting in the subway are very upset that some hames did not let them in front of them on the escalator.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №135563
 03.11.2016
>> Should you be able to do that?

Yes, fucking, because everyone has to "just so" respect. At first, by default, then if the reason appears, you can not respect. Everyone around them is hated and treated as rubbish, and they want to live well. They are surprised when they are treated similarly. Respect each other.

Leopold is a coward.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №135562
 03.11.2016
The whole life of the game
I’m stuck in the tutorial.

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