bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №137441
 31.12.2016
For the experiment, they wanted to do the worse. And it worked like always.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №137440
 31.12.2016
The story of a man who was not worthy to die for his homeland. The story of yesterday's landing in Crimea. As always, many experts have spoken about why and why nationalities are mentioned. It may cut someone’s ears and ears, but in a country of internationalism promoted by national character, a lot of trouble could have been struck.
It was in the mid-1970s. Then there was such an installation - pioneers for the perpetuation of war veterans (or as it was called there) crooked on the door of the apartment or house where the veteran lived red fan stars. This was done with the permission of the owner. Such a star appeared on the door of my classmate, his grandfather fought. But now I remember with certainty that with any requests – tell us we did not stick to him.
The fact is that the classmate had his father's surname, the usual Russian surname, and his grandfather was a German. Without any impurities. Native of the German Republic of the Volga. In the 40s he was called to service in the RKKA. He was on the front from 22 June 1941 to November 1941. He won two combat awards. Somewhere from August 41, the deportation of the Germans began, and not only from the Volga, but from the territories of the front strip, but this strip moved east with a furious speed and the zone of deportation expanded. Deported the population, and the soldiers were not leisure, or as yet, but were late.
In November, preparations for the counter-offensive under Moscow, the secrecy regime, etc. began. Part of the classmate's grandfather was just supplemented with this case. Immediately thinking - well, as the tankist Günter, who did not surrender in June 1941 to the compatriots at the retreat, awarded twice by the decrees of the Supreme Commander-in-Chief, will take the squad and run with secrets to the enemy. From the part of Günter sent like all the men of the Germans to the Labour Army, the forest to shave. Then until the 54th status of a special displaced person, noted in the command, I do not remember the periodicity. It appears once a week to check whether he escaped from Siberia. Then with this fig tie, live as you want and where you want. Only such institutions were accepted in a limited way. Well there in agriculture, for example, and what would an engineer to teach. Suddenly, by anger, the secret factory will ruin. Then they started teaching engineers. But again selectively - engineering can be, aircraft construction - none. In general, this grandfather lived with an insult in his heart - veteranship was given, nobody took away the prizes neither during deportation nor after, and what was taken from the part with shame before the offensive was not forgotten.
My heart was shaken, I wanted to see one of them. Learned through the commissariat where and when their regiment gathered. Then we read his story and learned. When he returned, he said, “I will never go there again. I don’t know anyone there.” The fact is that all who came to the meeting were tankers of the call 43-44gg, from the call 41 years no one survived. He dreamed of meeting his boys, and by the end of the 42nd they were all dead. He was looked at as a dinosaur - a tank car that did not burn for the first two years of the war - a miracle. To explain why it did not burn, of course, was unpleasant.
I don't know what he felt in the end, we guys then on the faces of people could not very well figure out the inner emotions, and it was uncomfortable to ask, neither his grandson, nor even my outsider. I remembered only one of his phrases, apparently something after this trip changed for him in the worldview: " They offended me, they saved me from death. I didn’t burn with everyone, I stayed alive.”

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №137439
 31.12.2016
Due to the abnormally warm winter, Medvedev is not sleeping for the fifth session.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №137438
 31.12.2016
I work as a carrier. He was carrying boxes from the apartment, and a 16-year-old girl was sitting on the bed. And then she says to me: "Work, fall". Well, I stumbled at her, and it turned out that she told the computer.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №137437
 31.12.2016
New Year, mandarins, olives, all things. Who is pleased, who is pleased. And I wish everyone in the new year to turn off the phone and feel life without it. Do not be dependent on the new year. All good luck!
I read it on the phone.
He also wrote it on the phone.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №137436
 31.12.2016
Head of Rostechnadzor
He proposed to give up
Use of gas
by Plit. Gazprom in Aachen.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №137435
 31.12.2016
I asked my husband to cook eggs. While I was busy, he boiled water, began to drop eggs into the boiler, naturally, burned his fingers. Of course, I regretted, first, then the dialogue:
Do you know how to put eggs in a boiler without burning your fingers?
WOW how?! to
HH: No of course! Put the eggs in cold water.
WOW : WOW. Well, I just confused them with pellets.
In January I go on a week trip. is terrible.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №137434
 31.12.2016
xxx: In which village do we have suricates, copybars and udras, for example?
YYY: We have neighbors... and suricates and copybars and widths taken together!

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №137433
 31.12.2016
A totalitarian tablet in the DPRK runs only permitted programs.

and LazyCrazy:
> games like Angry Birds adapted for local users

Do they throw nuclear bombs on capitalist pigs?

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №137432
 31.12.2016
fff: [reference to the news that on the purchased trees are detected pests]
NN: I had that!
NN is horror!
nnn: I laughed like that when I looked at "the needle"

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №137431
 30.12.2016
Rick, there are too many walkers! We will not pass.
A lot of? Pfff... You just weren’t in Ashan on December 30.

[ + 30 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №137430
 30.12.2016
The subscriber agreed to stay and eat with him (I bring the internet to the house). I agreed, asking why they don’t have a tree in the house. in response:
I do not celebrate pagan holidays for religious reasons.
It is by what?
Have you ever heard of our God Jehovah?! to
...

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №137429
 30.12.2016
- Guess the puzzle: White, not sugar. It is cold and not ice." ))))
No one wants it, no one wants it. ?
You seem to know the guess.
and yes? and e?
The body ? ? ?

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №137428
 30.12.2016
And the cat ate the cactus because it crumbled. A bowl full of food, a cat like a globe, and still eaten cactus in an attempt to destroy evil. By the way, the cat won - the cactus broke down, and then he escaped through the window, which someone of the guests opened.
Cactus really suffered if he could escape through the window.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №137427
 30.12.2016
I: The eldest (son - 8 years old) is sure to ask for a real living tree.
What does he not like artificial?? to
I: He says that without the real tree there will be no real Santa Claus.
Man: Artificial tree - the first step to rubber Santa)))

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №137426
 30.12.2016
"VTB will buy FC Dynamo" for 1 ruble".

Something is expensive...

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №137425
 30.12.2016
The dog is knocking at the door, apparently sleeping bigger...

Everything is clear – let go of the scratch!

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №137424
 30.12.2016
by romvel:
As for his gift of persuasion, it is enough to give one example: when he was stuck in Italy without a penny in his pocket and without a tongue, he was able to pair up a piece of toilet paper with his own hands pulled on it, convincing them that it was a lost sketch of Andy Warhol.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №137423
 30.12.2016
I live together with my husband. For a year and a half, he can't drink alcohol (totally) for medical reasons, I don't like alcohol myself and if I drink, then only for the company, respectively, nothing like this in the house should be like it. However, while cleaning up, a bottle of vodka was found in the remote kitchen cabinet. Judging by the packaging - cheap, but not the most marginal. The most mysterious is the bottle.

I remembered for a long time where she came from. If you reject the very mystical ideas of the type of "home booze", then there is nowhere to go. Then the doperlo - I bought it for technical purposes (before sticking the hooks on the wall to de-fatize the tiles). The husband cries that his wife is a snob and aesthetic, even for such a task does not buy the cheapest vodka.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №137422
 30.12.2016
Well modern farmers, don’t have to get upset: planted soybeans and get and butter, and meat, and sausage, and sausages, and chicken cakes, and milk, and chocolate, and candy, and peelmen, and cheese product from the same field.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna