bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №105054
 05.11.2014
Have you heard of geocaching?

xxx: the people lay a hole, leaving coordinates and marks to find the hiding place, and then those who want to take the hiding place, if they want to leave there something of their own.

YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY Something was so. A taxi driver told me what the drug addicts are doing. They pay money through the internet, and then go to get their portion out of the bucket.

[ + 20 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №105053
 05.11.2014
Americans and Europeans are probably now biting their elbows: was it hard to send humanitarian aid to Mordor when he was hungry in the early 1990s? You see, there would now be five or six decent European countries...

What kind of humanitarian? Did Wikipedia tell you?
— — —
This was told to me by the Italian sauce, French baby food, and American corns.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №105052
 05.11.2014
In the cup:

I can’t have a companion with him. He is such a true lover that, as the classic said, the truth cuts the uterus in the eye. It is unpleasant to me. Here is.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №105051
 05.11.2014
The difference.

What is the difference between shit and shit?
The caliber.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №105050
 05.11.2014
comment to the article "How to recognize a beaten machine" about what you need to look at gaps, places of boiling, coincidences of semi-tones of all parts
Bagurban: ah) another brother told that he was driving somehow with a friend on his car, and that all the way his car praises, brother and asked: - are you going to sell?
He says yes – not beaten, not painted!
What the brother answers - those spices that you cooked it, if the windows were closed, or around the place of welding on the glass, traces of metal drops remained...

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №105049
 05.11.2014
From Habr, cro:

My dog liked to scratch the bone into small pieces and bury them under my pillow, in tapes and put another piece in a plinth. So Lenovo went on with Page Up, Page Down, Home and End.

One of my acquaintances drank without drying every weekend, but became sober on Mondays. Then he started drinking every day. I stopped communicating with him the day I realized that I could not perceive the clarity of his mind. Just like the new functional keys of Lenovo laptops.

Chinese people, think about it.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №105048
 05.11.2014
This is what professional choice means. In the announcement of the sale of the car on the main photo (view from the front to the left and just below) - quite a cultural appearance. At the price, it is obvious that it is a little bit bit, but I wonder how much? I open the advertisement and look at the second photo. It feels like a house-size meteorite has fallen on the rest of the car.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №105047
 05.11.2014
No, I don’t understand our dad :facepalm: Working physically, in the tranche from morning to night in any weather – even under rainy rain, even in a 20-degree frost. Treat the teeth without anesthesia - it is not to what can be treated - himself refuses even free (why? Do not tolerate anything? I am the one who has no patience for him. But the slightest cold is FSE, the end of the world. Today I woke up with a fever, all morning proving to me that he had Ebola. On my question - where (even interested :wink: ) developed a whole theory - we bought the car, it went from Korea, came two weeks ago - here is the type from there. A A A A A A A!!! to

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №105046
 05.11.2014
The news:

Patriarch Kirill found a cure for confusion
Construction of the first Buddhist temple in Moscow


[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №105045
 05.11.2014
Romantically...

I'm a bad romantic, one night I walked on the balconies to the lady in the window, broke the fork, broke the pots with flowers, awakened my dad.
had to marry.

____________________________
Didn’t you save the cat?

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №105044
 05.11.2014
Well then tell me how the story ends, let’s.

They all ended up the same way – they lived long and happy.
Yyy: and morality is always like that - all trouble from the bab

Yes, Tsarevich kissed the frog, thinking it was a princess, and died in convulsions, because the frog turned out to be a terrible leaflet, one of the most poisonous earthlings on the planet. End of Story.

You will never have children.

xxx: I know

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №105043
 05.11.2014
by laugh_with_me

Cats have an interesting feature, Pratchett noted. If there is a cat somewhere, it is clear that it has always been there. Even if no hint of a cat was seen here a minute before. You look at this pleasant striped face and you understand: first there was a cat, and already around the cat began to grow grass and crawl all sorts of fools, then - to jump from the sable-toothed tigers. Around the cats an ancient man broke down. They set up a fireplace, spread fire in the shadow of the cat. Near the cat, a village was built, and then a city. And while the builders grabbed the boiler specifically for this nine-storey, the cat was squeezing nearby, and it had to be pulled out a hundred times from there, because it was interesting. So they built: they excavated a cubic meter of land – they got a resistant cat, they dug another two cubic meters – they got it again. A popular wisdom says: if you unravel the closet, you can find a lot of interesting and about a hundred times the same cat.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №105042
 05.11.2014
"A nation can only be destroyed"...So it has long been destroyed. Here, we will take the nearest house: in the elevator, the bulb is crushed - it will immediately be crushed or broken, under the windows on the stove a bunch of cigarettes and empty bottles, on the stairs of the building garbage, the lawns in the courtyard are stuck with machines, etc. and etc. Is it the people? If they even treat their own home in this way, then all Russia is unlikely to expect anything good from them.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №105041
 05.11.2014
Reesky: By the way about the swords, yesterday dreamed that I was taking part in the battle of the knight and the dragon, my sat on the stands and persistently proved that this dragon needle can not kill
Tanzen: So this is the one who pulled me out of the tribune under the hand...

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №105040
 05.11.2014
here here :

Picture of coconut crab:
"I never understood who thought of this "coconut crab". In my opinion, such a creature is more suitable for the name "Forget the Terrible Hernia";

Why be surprised here? Biologists are all like that. Remember Hagrid with his Gun and other similar lovers.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №105039
 05.11.2014
Type of optimism
No to!
But personally, I am gay, or rather happy that they are - we normal guys will get more girls))
--------
Unfortunately, excess girls will lead lesbians.

And then the guys will have to choose from the rest. Maybe this is my only chance to find a boyfriend.)


[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №105038
 05.11.2014
What is the difference between an atheist and a believer? The atheist has an inner conscience and the believer has an external. In order not to hurt his neighbors, an atheist does not need the threat of hell-boxes in the afterlife.

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №105037
 05.11.2014
A comrade who had been to the United States brought this legend from there, which still seems to be true, and may well be true.
Looking at one of the Russian restaurants in New York, after sitting there for a while, he paid attention to two old men at the neighboring table.
The old women were already clearly not at the age when it was possible to earn more or less decently, and the dishes before them attracted attention with their scarcity and cheapness. Feeling pity for them, the guy called the waitress and offered to order and pay for the decent lunch.
The waitress replied that it was useless; that the old women come here quite often, and for many years the restaurant has provided them with any meals for free. That day the old women went there to just talk, so the order was appropriate.
Many decades ago, a large group of Jewish refugees from the Soviet Union arrived in New York. The Tolstoy Foundation, if anyone has heard.
The mayor of New York didn’t get overwhelmed with a huge group of people who didn’t speak English and had no work, so he simply ordered them all to settle in empty apartments in one of the city’s neighborhoods. The area was called Brighton Beach, and was considered one of the most disadvantaged places not only in New York, but in all of America. Regiments of armed blacks, drug addiction, street and apartment robbery controlled the lives of its inhabitants, and the police in those places simply feared to appear. A lot of empty apartments.
Well, those refugees lived in such conditions, lived, and decided that something had to be done.
Some of them had acquaintances and friends in Odessa. But not just in Odessa, but in Odessa-mama. It was about them that the film "Start the liquidation" was filmed or there,
“The meeting place cannot be changed.” In general, it was decided to call those friends for revenue, and the friends did not fail - arrived almost all of the composition.
For them, for friends, that trip was something like an exotic safari hunt. Some black monkeys prevented their white friends from living.
In short, the Negroes of Brighton Beach disappeared in a short time; crime stopped, life improved, and some of those who went there stayed. The police were surprised, but where did it all go?
“So,” concluded the waitress, “these old women are among the last of our rescuers who have survived to our days.
And our restaurant never denies them anything.
GCHP

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №105036
 05.11.2014
A real man was invented by women to scare their husbands.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №105035
 05.11.2014
Are you a believer yourself?
Who am I? Oh my God, no of course.

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