bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №144914
 18.09.2017
With Bigler:
How did you break the Xerox? What did you do with him?
And we multiplied on it.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №144913
 18.09.2017
So, after removing all the settings, the phone started to work more smoothly, hurra!
WOW WOW!
The apps, of course, still fly out, but they do it quickly!

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №144912
 18.09.2017
Military exercises "West-2017"

According to the scenario of the exercises, three non-existent aggressor countries are attacking Belarus. These are Weishnouria, Wessbaria and Lubenia.

They invented...

Weishnouria, Wessbaria and Lubenia attacked Bulbenia.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №144911
 18.09.2017
The rescue service of the city of Worms in southwestern Germany received a call with a request for help. The genitals of the German athlete, who trained in one of the gyms of the city, stuck in a 2.5-kilogram "blind" for a barrel.

The merit of the athlete remained tight sports equipment for more than 3 hours.

The rescuers who arrived at the scene of the incident had to split the metal sports projectile with the help of a special tool.

Fuck you are not an ananas rings.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №144910
 18.09.2017
>> This is a very dangerous precedent. If this is really profitable, the browser will soon hang on half of the sites, even if only a few tabs are open. This will lead to the fact that browsers will limit the load on the processor on the part of the active page scripts at the level of percentage units, and the background - at the level of tenths or even hundreds of percent, depending on how many of them are open. This in turn will lead to the transition from scripts to some alternative technologies, such as those that cannot be used for mining. In general, a lot of inconvenience for users and a lot of unnecessary work for programmers.

It would be great if browsers had settings to limit the use of CPU and RAM for pages even unrelatively miners, just so that site owners start thinking about the performance of their work.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №144909
 18.09.2017
That’s because there was nowhere to watch. If there were smartphones at the time, we would also watch.
yyy: In those years there were programmable calculators, there was still a toy "Wow weather", where the wolf caught eggs. The cassette players were expensive exotics for the masters =(
XXX is OK! If not a major - watched the babies' ass... With the maffon - the babies watched you... beauty, not life! and :)

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №144908
 18.09.2017
News "Elizabeth Peskov removed her Instagram after a plagiarism scandal"

As life shows, you can’t categorically refuse anything new, but it’s worth introducing these innovations not overwhelmingly everywhere and for everyone, but gradually and thoughtfully, leaving everything useful and established itself before – it’s your thoughts, yes. There are no questions to the author. To the editor – a lot", – writes Silantyeva.

YYY: Their own thoughts? well well.
yyy: The cited passage almost literally repeats Ambridge’s speech to Hogwarts at the beginning of the Fifth Potter.
yyy: The aforementioned speech is presented in the book as an example of meaninglessness/water and an illustration of the illegal and unnecessary interference of the Ministry of Magic in school affairs.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №144907
 18.09.2017
Neradence: As I walked to the stop, a small black cat ran across the road and ran away from a large black cat.
The big black cat was big and couldn’t get away with me. He struck me in the legs, then became very upset, struck my shoe with his leg and tried to bite him.
Neradence: What do you think is worth waiting for something good from this day?

[ + 22 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №144906
 17.09.2017
And also on your conscience, little girl, will be what I googled today, who is a bald from Brothers.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №144905
 17.09.2017
Do you need programmers there?
YYY: Of course they are needed. You have to learn language.
I know a lot of languages.
YYY: Jewish I meant
XXX: I understand
XXX: What is it?

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №144904
 17.09.2017
xxx: "Italian court allowed to masturbate in public places".
To see Rome and to rejoice.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №144903
 17.09.2017
Is Mongolia a part of the world?
BBB: No, Mongolia is part of the Asian darkness!

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №144902
 17.09.2017
With Hicks:
xxx: I had two dozen years ago the 286th was the Hyundai brand. At that time I didn’t know that in 15 years I would buy a car of this brand ;)
yyy: And I had a Mitsubishi corporation coat three decades ago :-) But the car is Chevrolet :-(
Zzz: And I had a Mercedes baseball in the nineties. And indeed, sometimes you have to ride the castle on buses of this brand.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №144901
 17.09.2017
The meaningless laughter of stress

Boy, you are not alone. With me the same stuff - when stressed, I start roasting idiotically in the first seconds. This is a nervous organization. And you won’t explain it to anyone, yes.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №144900
 17.09.2017
“We will remember.” The NASA spacecraft burned up in the atmosphere of Saturn in the final of its 13-year mission.

Zzz: A small but bold car. by RIP.

Yyy: Very unfortunate (((( Twenty years... half a conscious life... I remember when Cassini launched in 1997, I was just beginning to seriously master the internet and went to the NASA website.

Xxx: Yes, they had already launched distant satellites when our brother and sister shared gardens and basars.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №144899
 17.09.2017
GT, "Cultivating artificial intelligence on the example of a simple game"
XX: Finally, I did the same thing with the game of the cross.
xxx: There were ideas to do the same for the game of chess or go, but I didn’t have enough time for it.
Yyy: As Norbert Weiner wrote, a person can be transmitted by telegraph, but at the moment the technical difficulties seem insurmountable.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №144898
 17.09.2017
Scientists have talked about the terrible harm of daily consumption of the same food.

Again, you gave me that straw! I can’t eat it every day, damn it. and c)

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №144897
 17.09.2017
The Child Grows Supercultural
I made very ugly iron candy today.
The child tried, and before spitting said:
- Mom, I don't like these candy, I can't eat them, I'm sick of them, can I spit out?
splashed
“Mommy, don’t worry, you cook so delicious, just everyone has different tastes.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №144896
 17.09.2017
And when in porn the actress greedy swallows a twenty-five-centimeter penis on the eggs and stands out of pleasure, taking the same penis without lubrication into the whitened anus, so it is "and why can't you so, something is wrong with you?"



In response, it is necessary to show romantic films - where the main character after a quarrel with the main character runs after her with flowers in her teeth (possibly to another continent), goes to the window of the tenth floor or there the plane stops at takeoff, on his knees confesses in love and further on the script. The same question.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №144895
 17.09.2017
There was once an article with photos of how a couple of American Rangers decided to go to the annual congress on foot, and that in a year they walked 2,000 kilometers. It is cool, right? And now the fitness tracker says that I have 2000 kilometers per year twisted in home-stop-work-dining-work-stop-shop-home mode. And the guys didn’t seem to get overwhelmed there. But no one publishes photos and articles with me. It is offensive...

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna