bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №148614
 29.01.2018
I want to ask the lovers of bright light: do you not feel sorry for your eyes? They are worn out of bright light. Our ancestors lived with fires, rays, candles, they had enough of this light. And the present blinding bright lights nature has not foreseen.

My dear people, our ancestors. They lived in the bright sun. A very bright sun, African, to which they were accustomed long before all kinds of fires and rays. So for healthy eyes, light, even with brightness approaching the midday sun in cloudless weather, threatens nothing. How do you feel on the street with your light fear? By the way, most likely it is acquired by you, due to the constant sitting locked up in a very dim light. I went there once, when there were only light bulbs. Sitting a couple of months at home (diploma painted), then the whole summer eyes teared from the sun - turned away.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №148613
 29.01.2018
- From and before the recipes proved once it-shny resource!

My mom stopped cooking, now I have to do it myself.)

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №148612
 29.01.2018
Break the system! Call my mom and ask if she’s in her hat.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №148611
 29.01.2018
XHH: You can still sing) Precisely so. Everyone is happy and happy.)

You know, I am not a supporter of such methods.

I prefer sex on a sober head.

HH: It is right.

WOW: First, I feel better, and secondly, a drunken and even half-drunken body, mm, no pleasure to fuck. And the matter is not even in the smell, but in the fact that the partner's brain is swimming in alcohol, not busy with you.

WOW: It’s like you fucking your grandmother, and she’s crucifying.

Not before you, short.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №148610
 29.01.2018
My mother met Alabama.
Why is it so hot in Syria?
The Alawites in Syria. Let us go.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №148609
 29.01.2018
XX:... when they bite that the cause of noise is not at all in the screws and shafts. And in rubber pads between any equipment. This is well illustrated in Western literature.
YY: Are rubber pads the most natural rubber pads or are they what you called the operators, the submarines, who misused the equipment?

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №148608
 29.01.2018
Do you know what emo was better than current hipsters? They tried to die.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №148607
 29.01.2018
Wife to husband: Chocolate (which you bought yesterday) is unpleasant. I have eaten almost all of it. Buy yourself delicious.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №148606
 29.01.2018
Silicon Valley’s new lineup of companies – unique benefits for their employees, which encourage them to work better and more efficiently. For example, Google offers its employees free massage, Twitter offers walls for climbing, and Dropbox organizes game tournaments.

colleagues
Spitz on the iron: I say - we need to go somewhere all together, you will not pull out, let's go at least in the circle we will shoot, if anything.
The meaning of these activities is that they are carried out without interruption from the workflow - right in the body to switch attention and allow the brain to rest.
Specialist on working with the base: just give me a shot and lie down - I agree and right here to rest

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №148605
 29.01.2018
We have a coworking. In the Camoring.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №148604
 29.01.2018
Is this a humorous IT resource?
- Yes
Can you tell me how to change the pads?

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №148603
 29.01.2018
She carries a sleeping daughter in her arms. She hugs her and says with a sleepy voice, “Mommy is a yellow hunde, number one, three, five.”
This tells a lot about how often we order a taxi. and :)

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №148602
 29.01.2018
I am responsible for this:
I will dare to declare here clearly and without apology the truth that has emerged recently: not all babies are stupid.* is
I declare -> not all fools - grandmothers

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №148601
 29.01.2018
Remember the eternal engine on human stupidity in the form of a pen with the inscription "do not spin"?
Spinner is his embodiment.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №148600
 29.01.2018
It was in the summer when my wife was in the 7th month of pregnancy. We decided to sit in the cafe with her and take a walk in the fresh air. Since I was a little late at work, she arrived before me and took a table on the street by placing an order. The dialogue from her face:



I sit at the table, I don’t touch anyone, here comes a guy (P) and says:

(I need to clarify that the table is high and my stomach is virtually not visible behind it)

Girl, what is your name?

A: The light

Q: Who are you waiting for?

Yes, girl, 7 months ago

I answered on the machine, not even having time to think. When I reached the point, I looked at the guy and saw a complete breakdown of the pattern on his face.



My wife, my tick. The name is fictional, all coincidences are coincidental.

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №148599
 29.01.2018
and Taxi.

Take a man to work this morning. He got into the car and immediately fell asleep. The wild snoring and the strong smell of straw drove with us to the end point. The Dove. I awoke. The man calculated and went out.

I catch the application. 2 minutes pass. The man comes out and goes to me.

Q: Will you bring it back?

I: No problem, what happened?

M: Yes, I fucking forgot: I was fired from here in December.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №148598
 29.01.2018
You won't believe, but yesterday in his suitcase a cat gave birth.
WOW : WOW )
Mitty has a cat in a penny, now he has a catwheel x)

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №148597
 29.01.2018
With the advent of children, any woman begins to realize that sleep is better than sex.

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №148596
 29.01.2018
In the continuation of the stories of dreams ball, the railroad. When I was young, I visited Moscow frequently. There was a shop in Leipzig. I don’t know if it exists now, it doesn’t matter. There was a railway, with arrows, tunnels and all the others. I watched these paratroopers run for a long time and dreamed that my son would have the same or similar. Buy-expensive, family, son 1 year, salary 140 p. Now I am 67 years old, son 42 years old, 4 grandchildren. Three years ago, I started to realize my dream. Fortunately, there are Chinese radio-controlled toys, which we buy to grandchildren, they break them (and the kids). From the old transformers, the secondary wheel was wrapped (usually a copper tire of 1.2x5 mm), rails, scales, shooters, and so on. To date, our railway on the country has 168 meters of paths, 4 arrows, 2 tunnels, 3 viaducts, 4 bridges. All under radio control. My son (42) comes with his grandchildren and we play. Here is Happiness! Imagine your dreams of childhood and youth.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №148595
 29.01.2018
One member asks the other:
Why are we all so hated?
And I don’t understand that, we’re not doing anything at all.

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