Volodin proposed the withdrawal of the Nobel Peace Prize.
And to introduce the procedure for the withdrawal of idiots from the State Duma did not propose...
Xxx: Remembered the story of how in class 4-5 with a friend went out of school and went to the side of the stop.
Go and go, next to the supermarket, which was in front of the stop, met my grandfather.
He approaches and says:
"Children, the hand hurts, help to get the little things out of the pocket"
Well, I, since I was always a kind and responsive person, decided to help, the old man is not. He put his hand in his pocket, and you know what? The cancer. Breast Cancer. A green one, with cracks, with ticks.
Clearly, I stumbled by surprise, and my grandfather and a friend like let me stumble on me.
The joke is that you can’t walk through life lessons and I didn’t climb my pockets anymore.
Yyy: Yes, your childhood brain has replaced this terrible memory with green cancer.
The optimist is looking forward to tomorrow. A pessimist with horror. The realist does not wait. The new day has come, so it’s not bad.
In the 1990s, the Union collapsed and our family collapsed – the father did not withstand the difficulties and fled. I contacted, but I did not help financially. My mother raised her two children alone. She was cut off at work, interrupted as much as she could, no one helped. Now my dad loves to teach me life and talk about something my mom doesn’t understand. And here I usually say the magical word “cake.”
Cake was the end of my life. I don’t remember how many days we only ate flour and water cakes, my mom had been delaying her salary for a long time. One day, she got a treasure box with her treasures - grandmother's bracelets for her 18th birthday, a wedding ring, a grandmother's ring, a bracelet and a suspension. and left.
I returned with a package of foods and the magic began – a couple of hours later the house filled with a wonderful smell of cakes. Oh my gods! The two kids were almost mad. We only got one cake. And my mom wore a fucka and left in the cold winter with these dreams of our hungry stomachs. When she came back, she hugged us, kissed us, cried and laughed. She was lucky — her mother approached the cars standing at the intersection and offered to buy cakes. In one of the cars was the manager of the restaurant. He bought a couple of cakes, left, and after a while returned and offered his mother at home to cook her wonderful cakes for his restaurant.
Many years have passed, but still in front of my eyes this picture - a mother in a fucka, in her hands full of pads of cakes carefully wrapped in a towel, and my sister and I with hungry eyes accompany her. Mother’s face is sad and sad, because she has food in her hands, but she can’t give us it, because then she won’t be able to make money — again — on food to feed us a little longer. Love your mothers.
Financial literacy is when you understand that if a fitness subscription for a month costs 1000 rubles, and for a year - 5000 rubles, then it will be more profitable not to take it at all.
Give a man a fish and he will eat well. Give a man a catch, and he will bring out all the brains with stories about his unprecedented catches.
How do I recognize you on a first date?
I’ll be in fat and with things!
I had such a case. I walk around the city in the evening toward the house. Here, suddenly, a DPS car drives me and signals me to press to the side. I get up, an employee approaches, asks to present a driver's license, a shirt and a Osago policy. I give the police, and I can't find the driver's license and the sickle anywhere. I am almost in panic, and the employee with a light smile stretches my documents and tells me to be more attentive. I found them out in the morning on the gasoline, and they apparently were somewhere nearby. They searched for me all day.
We had a resident here. When the apartment was accepted, two Ikeev carpets were not counted. I wondered – where?
“Oh, I stitched them, but I didn’t know how to clean them, so I threw them out,” was our answer. The hand face.
They are in the apartment and are not needed. Those are little things!”
We thought so, so we will deduct the cost of the small things from the amount of the pledge.
“Why are they so expensive? I watched it on the internet a few months ago and it was cheaper. No cost of delivery from Moscow did not take into account. "
You can order carpets with delivery - we will return the money at the old prices.
“What a wretched people you are! You don’t want to pay back, say so. Have you seen who you are renting the apartment?
See, therefore, the contract and the inventory of property, and the amount of the pledge is such.
xxx: I check honey simply: I give my friend with allergies to try, if it starts to suffocate, then I take a couple of liters at once.
Sergey Soloviev recalled that some time after the premiere of the detective "Ten Negroes" they met with Alexander Abdulov, discussed their affairs and slipped into the film.
Tell me, how did it end? Who is fucking? I asked Abdul.
Sasha, are you out? You were filming there! I haven’t read the book, but the script is. Surprised by Solovjov.
Yes, I read the script until my hero was killed on page 10. I have no idea how the matter ended...
In the kindergarten, I and a girl had adjacent beds. One day, in a quiet hour, she asked her to do a massage, like a bucket crawling on her hand. He promised me the same in return. I try my best, my fingers are already tired, and she doesn’t get along, requires continuation. Eventually, my fingers were completely stuck, I surrendered and demanded my turn. She replied, “Sorry, I’m tired and I want to sleep.” This is a kick. Almost 30 years have passed, and it is still offensive.
In order for the right bees to bring the right honey, you need to change the beekeeper.
My brother’s wife long ago asked him to go to the market for potatoes. He is a lazy ass, gathered for a few days, eventually gathered, climbed, opened the door, and there is a man standing and saying, "Hello! Do you need potatoes?”
Tomorrow in the Moscow metro for all passengers will work the payment system on the face of FacePay. You approach, remove the mask - the system will write off a fine of five thousand for doing without the mask.
The hardest professional deformation happened to me after working as a bartender in college. She’s still with me, and it’s been almost 15 years.
In the cafe, I do not order fresh and smoothies from carrots, apples, kiwi (because some smart people do not manage to wash and clean carrots if it is clean visually, do not clean the apples from the inside, and kiwi throw together with the skin), juices from bags (because they can stand open for 3 weeks), do not ask to bring water in a glass or ice (because the water can be poured from under the crane, and the ice generator works on the water supply and what is there with filters), before using I wipe a towel-squeeze-squeeze, sometimes when it is completely covered, then the cups and I always watch the waitress carry the plates with the ready-made food (whether his finger does not suck at the time in food)
When I don’t get something for a long time, I don’t drop my hands. I quickly find the guilty.
The night was so shrinking. She woke up and woke up herself. I lie down and think how good that my husband did not hear. And there’s a voice in the dark: “What, truffle dreams?”
If you get married on a Friday, you will be unhappy all your life.
The truth. Why should Friday be an exception?
I took the same course twice, with a difference of three years. The same textbook. And here I came to the task, where you had to answer questions, but the answers to write on another page. I wonder, I thought I! Now I will write the answers on a leaflet and compare what has changed in my life in three years. There was nothing special except one question – the worst person you’ve ever met in your life. The answer was the same, Michael.
Oh, Michael... That was my boss many years ago. A rare nest.
How should I be a fool, that in all my travels through cities and countries, to keep the bar of the best fool for ten years? ! to