A small Canadian town. We walk through the parking lot near the dungeon and the hospital, a guy approaches us, making movements with his hands. If you saw the clip about "Dancing the Crab", this is how it looked. We are standing, watching, while the guy is approaching us. The husband:
Is it your acquaintance?

It turned out that this Russian-speaking guy with insecure English showed clemms. The battery had to start.

What if he had been licked by another eagle before?

What a curious fantasy you have! :)

A Swedish philosopher has said that artificial intelligence will soon destroy mankind.

xxx: for the last and most spectacular part of the "Terminator" you will not have to pay.

This interactive documentary will be shown to all by action, free of charge.

You can only imagine - you came to the cemetery, went away, set a tent between the tombs, slept to sleep, silence, only the wind pumps the grass, some birds fly from branch to branch, where there is a mouse nearby - romance...
YYY: I am sick
YYY: already
That’s because you’re not romantic.

“I am no longer a thief at all, long ago and never,” the mayor of Chernomorsk, Khmelnyuk, made an unexpected confession.

In the Odessa region during the session of the Black Sea City Council, the mayor of the city Valery Khmelnyuk made a statement.

At the advice from the hall that you need to steal less, the mayor of Chernomorsk replied: “Thank you, I don’t steal at all, long ago and never.”

There have always been problems with self-esteem. I recently left the house and smoked a cigarette. On the bench near the entrance stands a little girl with her father, seeing me pulling out the finger and shouting "Dad, look, monster".

Mihr: And, besides, where do you get anti-matter in "weight" quantities?

Dan B-Yallay: Flying to the nearest anti-universe and all that. In any anti-construction anti-brick store anti-rubber anti-brick is sold.

Evgeny Mascherov: Don’t get confused. Antimatter is sold in antimatter.

INGELRII: The best solution would be to barter with the inhabitants of the Anti-Universe on the principle: we give them a kilogram of our matter, they give us a kilogram of their anti-matter. After all, our matter will be an anti-matter for them, and will be valued as much as we value their anti-matter.

In times, not so long ago, bought an overseas apparatus from batches, a multi-meter wrecked, in exchange for a tired batch. Of course, the tension in the socket, the resistance of everyone in the family, but on the switch of functions is still dark, the hunt will work out. It’s not in Russian, fucking. At work, my brother has a computer, a scanner, a printer, the program is good - it recognizes the texts, Promt again.
The device comes with two assistants, one red, one African American.
My first experience with political correctness.

The neurosurgeon has two rules - not to confuse the side and not to confuse the patient. I could not understand these rules for a long time until I was told a few stories about how patients were placed mowing holes not on the side where the hematoma was, but on the opposite side, confusing the side on the CT.

by BES

We call customers, remind us about the expiration of insurance policies.

She calls the client and hears the phone.

"Hello to you
This secretary...
Who are you calling...
He is busy...
I’ll give it to you"

These are pauses. In which Julia, don’t be a fool, answers:

This is Julia, I need Dmitry, well, thank you.

Brings to the customer base: "responded the secretary, transmitted the information"

We wait... time passes.
The customer calls himself with the question "Why did they not remind you?"

On the assertion that they informed the secretary, he rhetorizes and says: "This is "GUDOK" such, instead of music".

X: What to write in the resume in technical support to the bank?
Z: You have to be 5 minutes late for the interview. and enter with the words "thank you for waiting"

I once had a monitor that was moderately square :) and I watched movies on it. Then there were films in such a resolution that I watched them with black strips from the top and bottom. Then I bought a non-square monitor and watched these movies without stripes. And today I caught myself in the thought that the last movies I’ve watched are also with streaks from above and below... Someday the movies will be like a collar – narrow, but round...

(C of Habr)

I was previously amazed at how ugly the “flown” projects are from the inside. Now I know that beautiful projects don’t take off because they don’t have time to take off. While engineers in white coats are turning a beautiful engine to the perfect wing, a brigade of crazy fools led by a crazy adventurer is flying over them on the designs of a minibus, a fence and two industrial fans, to meet the second round of investments. The adventurer kindly distributes enthusiastic passengers coupons and paper bags.

Poor is the people who have a rich government.

In his life as a medical student, he practiced in a "psycho" - 2 weeks. I go in the morning, I see a friend from a parallel group standing near a three-storey building and waiting for something, shaking his head. To my reasonable question followed the answer (further from his words):
- I go to practice, suddenly I hear an intelligent voice from the third floor window: "Young man, don't give the sick a cigarette?" I answer, “Of course I’ll eat, but a cigarette won’t get to the third floor.” “And you throw a package, I’ll take one out of it, and I’ll bring the rest back to you.” From the third attempt, the box was still thrown into the hands of a grateful patient... Now I stand and think: who of us is smarter, I or he?

Now, after the story with the Colonel of the Ministry of Internal Affairs with an apartment filled with dollars, the judges, making decisions on the protocols drawn up by the Haishniks, will still twist like a poppy: "I have no reason to doubt the honesty of a police officer"?

Record of one organization at work: "Official activity of LLC - food for the zoo, circus and some schools on tenders."

<lina> Movies on my hard drive are divided into two types: those I’m going to watch and those I’m sorry to delete because only a few of them are sitting, or even just me.
( and )

Let him decide when he will grow up, to be baptized or not, and which religion in general to choose. And I totally agree with him. So if it worked for the names, then there would be no problems at all.

Like the Indians. Name as a result of action. A sharp eye, a sharp eye. It is a big nest. Sorry, it’s not from there.

About the names.

I was acquainted with the exquisite old name Concordia. And the paternity corresponded to the name, and the surname, but there was one shortcut - this Concordia worked as a primary school teacher. No, by the end of the first class, the children had already pronounced clearly and did not confuse her name, but until this point... Crocodile, Crocodile, Knopordium, Crocodile, what variants she did not have to hear from them. It is good that she was a reasonable person with a sense of humor, laughing remembered especially funny options and quietly waited for the children to get used to.