bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №107214
 23.12.2014
What are you doing?
and eat.
Where is?
In the mouth.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №107213
 23.12.2014
to this:
Where are the ports in the Czech Republic? It seems like there is no way out to the sea.
@ by
Here is a generation raised on all kinds of dumb Soviet textbooks of geography! Any modern student who has passed an EGE knows that the Czech Republic has a common port with Belarus. The same one that Psaka promised to send the sixth fleet of the United States :)

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №107212
 23.12.2014
dead.pihto: Specialty: Equipment Engineer of the bakery industry
Experience of work:
Configuration, HTML/CSS, SEO, PHP coding
Dead.Pihto: I’ll interview him right away
dead.pihto: I need to urgently come up with questions, or I only "have you used bread crumbs at work"
How to hang a sabmit on a baton.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №107211
 23.12.2014
YYY: When someone looks at the Hobbit, there is one Michalkov in the world who is sad.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №107210
 23.12.2014
XXX: I am going to 15.01 go to Navala to encourage. Hole to do.
YYY : Good luck. Do not exaggerate. and :)
xxx how will it be :)
xxx: no, I will not beat the windows and burn the omonovs too ))
YYY: Okay well. The 31st will be written. and ;)
XXX is 31?
xxx: 15.01 + 15 days

[ + 23 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №107209
 23.12.2014
Once a friend told me that they had two bars in the fleet - to lower the ears at the hat and to wear clothes in the frost. Well, it is more fun to ring frozen eggs...In the winter, another thing is added, global and common to all - not to wear a mask if you are sick. The entire bus is full of sneezing and sneezing...But it is worth wearing a mask – everyone looks with round eyes, like a zombie.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №107208
 23.12.2014
Applied Design in the Family.
Wife: Can you make me a rough flooring for flowers?
Husband: Oh, and she’ll be so rude that you’ll cry when you look at her.

[ + 33 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №107207
 23.12.2014
textliner:Near a cute stature - "Kim Jong-un may not have given his uncle to disperse 120 hungry dogs ("Time", USA)"
I suggest another series.
"Obama may not have eaten his grandfather with other relatives"
“Merkel probably didn’t dance striptease instead of school.”
"Holland is probably not Dr. Mengele's dressed-out"
Would you object? I doubt Obama myself.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №107206
 23.12.2014
I had a casus yesterday. I walk through the street, I don’t touch anyone, and there a young man stops me with a saying:
Give me one minute! I have a very good and happy day today! Once upon a time, a happy man gave me a coin for luck. And since my day is happy today, I want to give you this coin! May it bring you good luck!
xxx: gives a coin of 100 tg, and goes on enjoying life
X: And then I was thinking about half a day, what was it at all?? to

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №107205
 23.12.2014
From the dispute about where it is better to meet - on the Internet or in real:
It’s best in the orgia. There is immediately clear what is waiting for you in the plan cm / min, or go for a coffee with them, about travel trindi ;D ;D

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №107204
 22.12.2014
Instagram was invented by grandmothers to know if their grandchildren are eating well.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №107203
 22.12.2014
Small got sick, I write text with my wife (g) before leaving work after a sleepy night and a hard working day.
I: Do I need any medications?
A: Yes, Viferon candles and Panadol suspension, chamomile.
No, fucking the romance.
He took the brains of pharmacists of all surrounding pharmacies in attempts to find the mysterious drug "chren with chamomile". I come home.
Q: How long is it?
I: I was looking for your shit with the camouflage, there is nowhere! Tomorrow I will go to a couple of pharmacies.
The wife hangs for a couple of seconds with a face expression in the style of o_0, and then folds in half and begins to hysterically rust. It turns out that I was an idiot and I should have guessed that I just didn’t need to buy chamomile!

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №107202
 22.12.2014
SS: today used the blue isolant
SS: fixed the girland (pulled off one lamp, wire twisted and wrapped SI)
SS: True, the isolant is not canonical color, but dark blue
SS: So a little uncertain about the outcome

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №107201
 22.12.2014
Comment to the news "Bensin in the United States dropped to the lowest level in the last 5 years":

The world prices of oil are falling and the prices of domestic oil are falling??? This is news from a parallel universe, right?

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №107200
 22.12.2014
I was on a plane with a friend. The stewards began to spread the heat. They reach us.
Stewardess: Chicken, fish or meat?
I: the chicken
The girlfriend: Chicken
The stewardess – with a second and loud voice: Here are two chickens!! to
My wife and I are in the wild. When the stewardess arrived, red and rounded eyes: Oh, sorry, I'm not about you.
The rest of the flight.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №107199
 22.12.2014
Talk about the children:
Yes, I look here, all my girlfriends get jewelry and other delights and joys of life for the children given to their husbands.
I am just somewhat bad. I gave birth to a child for free.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №107198
 22.12.2014
In connection with the introduction of a moratorium on the death penalty in Russia, all convicts will be buried alive.

[ + 26 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №107197
 22.12.2014
Sanya_77: Terrorism consists not only in murders, but also in intimidating societies, seeking to change their values and way of life.
Well, I lived until that great day when things began to be called by their names!
And that’s all:"sanctions, sanctions..."

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №107196
 22.12.2014
Nicholas: My name is Sprot. by Nikolai Šprot.
Reports of fish. The head.

[ + 22 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №107195
 22.12.2014
In fact, most often in surgery, green has been used (and is used) not so much for disinfection (because there are milder antiseptics in the open wound to infuse alcohol), namely to mark the edges of the wound and monitor the dynamics of the healing of the seam.

Oh, and tell it in our nursery, please.And then there is a piece of gaze, impregnated with green, immediately after the birth, squeezed to where the child appeared.And there are not only wounds, there are also mucous membranes, which green can be burned at all.

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