Commentary from Yandex:

This processor is designed for 3 categories of users:
1st Overclockers and enthusiasts.
2nd Users with video encoding/decoding/mounting.
Three Daddy!I want 111.

The most serious and thoughtful boy in the class quietly adds: "Or a jerk could have found another jerk... and a jerk - another jerk...". >_<
— — — —
It appears that he was the only one who knew that the crab and the frog are not just male and female, but different biological species from different families, which cannot be crossed, therefore it is absolutely unnecessary to marry them.

News on GitHub:
In China, the new iPhone 6S can be obtained by donating sperm

boomyjee17: The term “apple dough” takes on a new shade)

A wise man tries to acquire lazy enemies.

I go to Moscow by metro. the village. I got a laptop and I printed. There is a guy behind me. Ordinary and full. It looks like an office plankton. He looked at me. He asks:
How is it now in Eilat? Not very hot? I am going to travel...
I looked at him. I say surprisingly:
Are we acquainted?
and no.
How did you know that I am from Israel?
“Deduction and observation,” he said seriously. Your shirt is outside. We only wear hippies. You are not a hippie. Smooth, bearded, but not Caucasian. and relaxed. Apparently a Jew. But not local. And not Russian at all. In short, either an American or an Israeli. But the option with the American I immediately rejected.
Why is? I ask simply.
“Maybe... I thought, maybe because you have the Hebrew on your keyboard.

by Henrich Nebolsin

He did, as advised on the Internet, to learn English: went to England, smoked, went to jail. A full year of public retention among carriers.
Now I know perfectly Hindi and Arabic, good Chinese and some African dialect. English with a dictionary.

This work can be described in two words: a phyllic symbol.

Note: XXX is a virologist in one of the largest NIHs.

XH: Well, I should start one thing, something I completely forgot about him. test several serums against the Ebola virus.

YYY: This is how the world will one day die – from the fact that the XX will forget to test the serum against a virus that will kill everyone!

One day my employee got fired at work and his cup of tea with milk stood on the window for about six months. They were thrown away when the progenitors of the life that appeared dried up and died out together with tea.
Yyy: We usually have what came out of the circle - then it works instead of the fired

XX: A lie for good is called. My mother still confidently says that she wanted a child in 1992 as an unmarried second-year student in a foreign city, without her own housing and work. He is usually tactically silent. And I pretend I can’t remember the first four years of my grandmother’s life in Samara.

ClientT: Why traveled for 50p.free 100minutes, which connected for 100p.? to

We discuss with the fifth grade the fairy tale "Zhuravl and Capla" (where they walk one after the other, marry each other, and not all can get married). "In general, the dwarf could find himself and another dwarf, and the dwarf - another dwarf!" - someone says, after which the most serious and thoughtful boy in the class quietly adds: "Or the dwarf could find another dwarf... and the dwarf - another dwarf...". >_<

From the Forum of Ursa ©
We were forced to go to elections. Each worker, after voting, must call his master, and he reports every hour to the head of the unit who has already voted. Further, they were frightened by non-voting organizations. In fact, no one called the master. The master himself called the responsible and named the number of voters "from the lighthouse". On paper, they voted 100%, but nobody really knows.
My Fathers, it is a trumpet. "This country"© no one will ever win... Even electoral fraud is falsified.

When the Vietnam War began, anti-war rallies began to take place in the United States, very few and unpopular among the majority of the population. One day, a man with a poster was asked, “Why are you standing, you still change nothing?” He replied, “I stand, so that nothing will change me.”

The top commentary:
That man was Albert Einstein.

Stone to a recent photo of Mickey Rourke:

This is still lucky. E@lo to he after the bull, drugs, failed boxing and plastic more on the ass with the eyes looks like.

To increase the retirement age every year by 1 year, how do they imagine it?! to

and suddenly. He also didn’t go straight away.
Excellent disguise of the one-time increase in retirement age. Only those who will retire next year will understand this.

Just sent to study the instructions of the filter press brand "Jinjiang"

By analogy we are waiting for instructions on the pump brand "Dryndrin" and optical (laser) sensors "pippy" :-)
The whole department is sitting down and inventing new brands.)
by AntonFox

Application to the help desk: In the secondary room, a specific sound of electrical current in the wires!

At work, a colleague told me that he was defeated by crows. One of his friends brought him a ship syrene. Placing the syrene in a box, he buried it by 1.5 meters, stretching the wire from it into the house. It turned on before leaving. When he returned for the next weekend, his neighbor began to tell him that something strange was happening in the village. The fact that crows, mice and rats fled not only from him, but also from the nearest neighbors is half the matter. The worms dispersed and the chickens in the village stopped carrying.

"... for girls, fortunately, do not write apophers "if a man refuses - it is he so cuddly, boldly rape"

Why, we are rubbed all our lives, to say, men want only one, you need to be beautiful, and he will immediately turn on the motorcycle, and then the matter of technology. And then suddenly it turns out that in all your tricks you are not needed by the vast majority, you can at least get rid of it, but at the stage of closer communication everything is likely to collapse because of something less superficial. A loved one may not have a desire. he is banally tired - no, well, of course, you can seduce him, only the quality of this process is quite strange. Do you think this is logical and understandable? So, in the shell, do the adult grandmothers tell these young fools?