bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №143754
 09.08.2017
xxx: For example, I go with the kids, I see a bunch of babies standing around the bench (I counted them 9) and rushing across the street. We approach closer and I see one of them in the hands of a tablet. They are looking at something. But the outcry killed me and said, “Look, look, I’m not going to behave like that.” It is not easy" It is scary to think what they looked there.)

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №143753
 09.08.2017
>download rights is having category B to learn on C

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №143752
 09.08.2017
Written with a pen, you can’t cut it off with a tail.
Written on the Internet, you will not cut off the machete!

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №143751
 09.08.2017
In a conversation about the quantity of things, the wife once said:
I suffer from minimalism.
Is it how?
I have little.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №143750
 09.08.2017
XXX: Return the Poklonska to Ukraine

Only a barter. We will then send you Savchenko back.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №143749
 09.08.2017
If the EA did the tetris, it would look like this: the Unreal Engine of the latest version, thousands of polygons for each figure, explosions when filling the line, dust, fog, scratches of figures, a photo-realistic background. Detailed training at zero speed. A couple of days after the release - dlz with speeds 3-5, then dlz with skins, then dlz with 6-8 speed, another dlz with skins and background, bagfix, dlz with skins, and only then dlz with palka.

[ + 20 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №143748
 09.08.2017
On the maile on the main hanging news: "Balled puppies do not have a career". It feels like it was written by Boyarsky about the growing generation.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №143747
 09.08.2017
My father told me this story, that a friend of him went to rest in Romania, there met the countrymen and they decided to mark this matter, drunk well in the bar and broke up on the rooms in the hotel. In the morning comes for breakfast, and there are only Russians sitting there, no foreigners. He asks the service staff why there is no one, and he is answered that it turns out that there was an earthquake at night and all the Germans, English and French started to order the bus to the embassy and leave, and the Russians are asleep, you can't wake them up. After a friend of his father and says, "I felt that I was swallowing, I think, they got drunk, that even lying swallows."

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №143746
 09.08.2017
What calls

xxx: I read the city of Nevinnomyssk as Nevinnosymsk. A great top named.

I remember, an army acquaintance from Stavropol called it "Nemytosvinsk".

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №143745
 09.08.2017
One writes about despair and existence without joy.

The second asks: Did you check the iron? Iron deficiency leads to loss of strength.

Thirdly I agree. Normal iron, a couple of toys on it on ultimate settings, a couple of beer boxes and you can live a week / another.

[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №143744
 09.08.2017
If a joke is not funny, it is an aphorism.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №143743
 09.08.2017
The dog tears.

Yesterday, returning from a walk, we met a group of six people and three dogs: two men, two women, children of different ages, two young Labradors and a beautiful basset hound. Basset was good! Large, strong, brown-red-white colour, with long ears and smart eyes – just a look. We stopped to admire the basset and its masters on our Scottish terrier. During the conversation it became clear that they had two bassets, the sister of the beautiful man somewhere in the woods and is about to appear. Well, we talked and broke up, the sister of the basset never appeared although the owners called her on all the voices.

On the right side of the road, behind the bushes and trees, there was a river. A fast and cold river carried the water of the melting glaciers of Alaska into the Pacific Ocean. There was plenty of water and we watched for our Scottish man not to get near the river; there were crumbling and slippery shores unnoticed by the high grass. On the way back, the Scottish man did not rush very much anywhere, but flocked behind, shaking out of the heat, showing us with all his appearance that "you are in shorts at all, and I am in a shirt at all, and even after all my haircuts, I am still not naked."

My husband is a retired military doctor; he has a great sense of humor, but quite specific as military doctors have seen and experienced a lot. So I wasn’t surprised when he suddenly began to loudly and longly, imitating the loud basset. The Scots were not surprised either. We continued to go. My husband continued to cuddle and cuddle. I began to offer him variants of hoodies, hoodie designs and dog food that would best fit with beer. But suddenly, from the side of the river, a dog began to loudly and longly laugh.

Although it seemed to me that the dog was lying on the other shore, we stopped and my husband began to look at the grass along the road. If he found a path in the grass, he walked on it to the river, looking at the dog. At the same time, he continued to laugh and swing, the dog responded to him, she was very close. Our dog, tired of the hike and the heat, just quietly watched the show. I too. Suddenly the man shouted, “I found it! It is in the water!”

I had to run back to find the dog’s owner. Fortunately, they had already returned, suspecting something wrong. I shrugged her hand, pointing to the river. The men ran to meet me.

The bass sister crashed from a break of about two meters. She was holding her foreheads to the roots of the trees, but her body was already completely in the water. She stayed in the ice water for about thirty minutes and only the strong legs of the basset helped her not to crash into the water. The river revelled, stifling the dog’s squid, she had no chance to climb to the shore herself, she was virtually doomed.

The outbreak was steep and wet, it would be difficult to pull out the dog alone, even the three men were accompanied for quite a long time. I stood on the road helping women hold their remaining three dogs and children. All of this was used to help men.

The men finally appeared. Wrapped in clay, but happy. The owner carried his sister’s swimsuit in his arms. Both were wet, as it turned out later he also fell into the water. Molly's sister was bright red with white legs, white face, and light brown eyes. She trembled with great trembling. and. and. I was crying.

All the way back, the husband told in detail the operation to rescue the dog and how its owner crashed into the water and how difficult it was to hold him wet hands and how, seeing the helpless dog in the water, he again felt the fear of the doctor to lose the patient. And I all remembered the eyes of the dog and her tears – she was not abandoned, she was returned, she was saved.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №143742
 09.08.2017
Judging by television advertising, any cute girl on the street who goes and smiles: menstrual, drowsy, she endlessly pierces, removes her hair 24 hours a day and feeds her cavalier with Viagra. And only fat old grandmothers are healthy, like sailors before landing.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №143741
 09.08.2017
I was in the bus next to such a beautiful girl today.
Q: What about your personal life?

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №143740
 09.08.2017
I watched a Chinese movie about schoolchildren. A movie, like a good one, about confronting and developing responsibility for your actions. It was only after we had seen about two-thirds of the movie that my mom began to clarify what was happening. I explain to her, here is the main character, here is his best friend, but here is the worst enemy, who is studying in the neighboring class. My mom’s response just dropped me under the table. "I thought it was all one person!"

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №143739
 09.08.2017
A man comes in front of him, holds his phone near his ear and is silent. Gone by him, he is silent. Looking around, he holds the phone at his ear and is silent.
He talks to his wife, Sturridge guessed.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №143738
 09.08.2017
About the steam boilers:

Xenos WIGHT: Dick straight boilers have long been known to take the same Dobl boiler that stood on the car of his own name. It requires constant supervision of clever automation, while capricious, like a pregnant wife. And if a self-burning direct current boiler is placed on the boat under good pressure, the vibration will be very disturbing.
rbt06: Where does the vibration come from?
Xenos WIGHT: From the point of who sits next to you.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №143737
 09.08.2017
Evolution of neighbors:
The summer of 2013. The man decided to lock his balcony.
The summer of 2014. Toning glasses on this very balcony.
The summer of 2015. Docchi hanged the blinds.
The summer of 2016. Actually nothing happened. I decided that the man was calm and satisfied with his work.
Summer 2017 August 8th. The man went further and knocked down all the windows on the balcony with NACHER FANEROI.
I look forward to the summer of 2018 and the brick laying.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №143736
 09.08.2017
You can wash in the cold for two weeks. Gentle and damn, I found it. My wife and children have been taught.

I warm myself.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №143735
 08.08.2017
Post from 06.12.2014
I bought vitamins.
xxx: *name of vitamins* for men
XXX: The pharmacist advised
A pack of condoms, for the case.
xxx: I hope to go before 2018 or the money will be wasted)
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