Lesson of History:
The Russian barbarians broke into shells, halls, stands, leaving behind cities, libraries, universities and theatres.

A single mother of ten children. I have been pursued by a complex of inferiority throughout my life. I think men are ignoring me.

Fyhtfkm: One group at 5 a.m. sent a sms about the fact that a port wine with a douche is a thing. And they call it "grush-prush"...

I sit behind a compact surfer on the internet and here a mouse flies to me and sits on my monitor. I turned the cursor to her and she moved to another place. I immediately understood what to do: I opened the painting, drawn a grid and began to play with it in the crosses of the Noliki - I will bring the mouse to her, she will fly and I will put the cross in the square where the cross sat. So here she won me two games out of three=) When she lost, she did the same thing worthy of another samurai - drowned in my coffee

Here was the settlement in the shelter... They settled new... first-coaches... they are still so naive))) but nothing, soon they will scratch their first mold in the forgotten unwashed pot... They scratch the whole toilet with the whole room, because I can’t drink and decided to mix everything in a row... they burn their first borst... they will burn the pot together with ham and much more... эх))) I envy them)

Did you cry at least once after we split up?
She: Yes
She: When the barrel fell on her foot

Sergey Yurievich: Ilya Andreevich, come to me with an explanation why you have not yet picked up the server.
Harabaster: Yes Sergey Yuryevich, I’ll go now.
Harabaster: URA, the owner has appointed me a beloved wife

The employee, ending the story of her jean and summarizing a sad conclusion:
I was Oksana Vladimirovna before, and now I am Oksana fucking.

PRIFFET, whose mine did you remove from your friends in contact?
Oh the fucking shit! I forgot!
HHH: I am not offended! : *
The user xxx has been removed from your contact list
Now is it all =)

shtaket (14:14:18 27/08/2009)
I ordered a pizza two hours ago.
shtaket (14:14:29 27/08/2009)
There was no pizza, and then the courier decided to check.
shtaket (14:14:43 27/08/2009)
Contact us on the website and...
shtaket (14:14:53 27/08/2009)
We ordered a pizza in Petra!!!! to

to this:

The wild beetle who attacked people in China was the victim of an 83-year-old grandmother, reports on Thursday the news service "Zhongo van".
An unequal fight occurred last Sunday in the suburbs of Chongqing metropolis. A wild cock weighing 107 kilograms stumbled from the bushes on the old lady Hu Chengjeng when she peacefully burned the garden.
Armed only with a knife, the elderly woman managed to cope with the wild beast within minutes.
Grandma Hu herself managed to cope with a slight scare and a few scratches.

I think this is the same grandmother from "Madagascar":D

xxx: We had such a heat lately that I finally couldn’t stand it and put the air conditioner at home. And you know, it helped – from the next day the rains began, it became cooler.

I lived in Vietnam for 7 years.
Did you see Rambo?

Conversation of the Director-General with the Head of Staff:
GD: Fedor, I have invented a new system of motivation in our office:
We’ll let the employees climb, and when it’s necessary to press, I’ll report that I’ve been aware of the machinations all this time and that it can end up in trouble.
OK: Yes, but this way you can lose the authority and respect of the collective and it can have negative consequences.
GD: Then you’ll be blackmailing Fedor.
Okay what? No, I can’t, I’m the head of staff. People see in me support and support, no, I can’t.
G.D.: And who of us pulls a pack of paper home a month, and 1C on a flash drive?! to

Gabe Neill claims the best body

Victoria's Secret, the most famous manufacturer of women's underwear on the planet, launched a customer competition for the best body and, surprisingly, it did not go without familiar faces. Right now, the third line in the vote is firmly held by Gabe Neill.

Someone sent a photo of Valve director, which provoked a flash mob. Right now, 11 and a half thousand people voted for Gabe (and I included, what was there). If Gabe wins, he will get a three-day tour of New York’s beauty salons.

When your work seems unnecessary and meaningless, remember the builders of the Egyptian pyramids.

I decided somehow to find a new way to lose weight, for which I bought a whole pack of tea in the pharmacy with the romantic name "Flying Lemon". I first realized that after this tea you lose weight and fly, this careless bird.
It all turned out to be much more prosaic. The experiment began on Monday morning after coming to work. In the instructions was written "One pack for half a liter of water." Why I didn't be alert at the time of reading the instructions written in such a language - it's hard to say, I probably wanted to feel a lump faster.
Having decided that I would not drink half a liter at a time, I decided to increase my concentration and asked the secretary (Olu) to make me "a cup of this new tea, which I brought this morning."
Fifteen minutes after I had the bitter taste of the new drink, I was flying around the hallway, holding my arms to my back, with one thought: “Just get the time.” Why I wasn’t broken down while I was running, I can’t understand yet.
The rest of the day passed like a puddle. In short flights, like in advertising.
“Let the world wait.” Only from the advertisement it was distinguished by the complete absence of any romance.

In general, Zateya failed at the initial stage... But the main thing was to go further... After a short depression, I pushed the box of tea onto the most distant shelf of the Oline Tea Wardrobe and safely forgot about it.

Three months have passed. There was another meeting in the cabinet on a mega-important issue. The urgency was such that the meeting was held in the form of "Until the issue is resolved, damn who will leave the cabinet!“”
Three hours passed, during this time they had time to scandalize, to reconcile, but no consensus was reached. To make people feel the weight of the three-hour marathon, which promised to last, I picked up the phone and said:
“Ola, we have three teas and I have coffee.” With this phrase I predetermined the outcome of the meeting and predetermined the fate of the people present for the rest of the day.
After 15 minutes, people began somehow unnaturally shaking and quietly standing. Ivanovic asked to smoke.
Smoke here! I said it firmly and put a ashes bar in front of him.
“No, I’m sorry, I’m not used to the cabinet,” Ivanovich beat.
He smoked in his office two packs a day and jumped out.
The office turned the chair.
Following him for 5 minutes to smoke jumped out and the rest, which I was very surprised, because I knew they did not smoke.
20 minutes passed... No one came... It started to seem disrespectful... I went out into the hallway and went to the smoking room to put things in order and find out why they didn’t want to continue the meeting.
In the corridor, I saw Ivanych appear from the toilet door, he stopped at the threshold for a moment, but then stretched out his arms with a stone and rushed back, like a bird, which suddenly found long-awaited freedom.
I almost ran into my office, and with a stunned voice asked the secretary to give me a box of “this new tea with a bird on the box”... With fear I raised the cover.
For two months after that, the staff refused to drink anything and ate in my office. And Ivanovic even drank vodka with suspicion.

One man says to another:
I have a son born!! My son!! After my six daughters.
My son is finally born!!! to
Who is more like you or your wife?
I don’t know, I haven’t looked at her face yet.

Annaelle: I seem to have earned.
Annaelle: I have a refrigerator with a top freezer and a microwave on it.
Annaelle: Yesterday I came back from work, I think I’m going to the stove now. I put food-open the freezer-storage food in the freezer-closing the freezer- turn on the microwave-cleaning-the microwave shake, type everything is ready-I came calmly got food from the freezer and went to the room - get hot to eat

Yesterday I made a mask of blue clay, smashed her whole body, so my husband ran after me all night and spoke that he wanted sex with a strawberry.