bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 37 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №70513
 24.09.2012
V.elina: Why do clumsy guys choose the most stupid ladies as friends?? to
Stretch : well. If clay boys were only coupled with clay bodies, then there would be an evolutionary stratification of society. In this way, the offspring are balanced and produce a gray mass. This society is stable.

[ + 37 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №70512
 24.09.2012
From Habr:
Imagine you are on a deserted island. You need to program a microcontroller.

[ + 31 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №70511
 24.09.2012
[madar] The only goal in the match "Rubin" - "Cuban" was scored at the very end of the first half - distinguished Salvatore Bocquetti. In the match "Spartak" against "Rostov" the double marked Emenique, another goal on the account of Ari - for him this ball became the first in the season. In the composition of "Rostov" distinguished Floran Sinama-Ponyol.

This is a Russian championship.

[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №70510
 24.09.2012
My friend got some money. He comes home drunk, falls on a chair in the kitchen, pulls money out of his pocket and says:
This is what I always have to be: drunk and with money.

[ + 46 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №70509
 24.09.2012
Rabbits are gentle, not afraid.
B: Have you seen their nails? They will lock the wolf.
A: They do not have enough brains, they have three reflexes: run, eat, fuck, and all)))
B: terrible animals
B: Get caught, fucked and eaten.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №70508
 24.09.2012
Comments to the article, which compares the cameras of the iPhone 5 and Nokia 808:

xxx: "Both cameras are undoubtedly good and quite suitable for shooting quite professional video content."

This is a joke, right?

YYY: No, it’s pure truth, I’ve thrown RED out.

Zzzz: Give me the rubbish address, I am already leaving.

Yyy: There are already 5 bodies, the shooting continues.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №70507
 24.09.2012
YYY
But, to be honest, I was upset.

for the weekend

XXX is
Directly visible?? to
Hahahaha
You have weight.
for soup
It is not enough

YYY
No, I am telling the truth!
Clothes are visible

XXX is
Spotted
from food

YYY
Fuck it :D

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №70506
 24.09.2012
Exogen: Aunt, in terms of sexual pleasure, it doesn't matter - with rubber to fuck or without. How true is that impression?
hleba_netu: wrong in the root
No rubber is more pleasant.
With the rubber, it is quieter.
Exogen: How do you find balance?
hleba_netu: in abstinence :D

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №70505
 24.09.2012
Funny how the same phrase can be a good wish for women and a terrible curse for men.
xxx: "Let all your calories go to your breasts"

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №70504
 24.09.2012
xxx: Every girl should have an outline...you, for example, a heat physicist)

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №70503
 24.09.2012
XXX: Will you go?
YYYYYYYYYYYYY
XXX is cold.
YYY: I did not understand
Do you take vodka?

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №70502
 24.09.2012
Lawrence Johnston Peter is known for his various striking sentences based on paradoxes. For example, he called the hot dog the most noble of dogs, because unlike other dogs that bite the hand of the breastfeeding, the hot dog feeds the hand of the bite.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №70501
 24.09.2012
Have you already borrowed your "Viagra in the coffee shop"? Nippon doesn’t work that way. Here are a few crushed pills of Purgen in the sugar bar really accelerate workers, but increase the tension in the team.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №70500
 24.09.2012
Let him forgive his sins for all his sins "Rise up and prepare yourself!".

YYY: ROFL

XXX: But I want marinated bacon! OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO(

Yesterday I cooked the soup! ?

I lived like that :D

XXX: Come on, go on! :D

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №70499
 24.09.2012
- One of us sent a letter: "Mommy, put me on the phone 900 rubles, at home I will explain everything"You know what I sent?
...??? to
Dying my daughter!

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №70498
 24.09.2012
She: I was so good, so good, after that you owe me just a bit of tiramisu!
He is: 0_o?! to
She: Yes, there is no logic in that, but still!!! to

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №70497
 24.09.2012
Today, on Sunday morning, the broadcast was on the ORT "Health". In the guests were: Večyaslav Zaitsev and his granddaughter, and this is the case. The paradox is the harmlessness of GMOs. In principle, they would be able to convince the audience, but there is one but.
This very ignorance of GMO products was discussed: 1) a woman who conducts the broadcast at 5 a.m. on a holiday day; 2) a man with an unclear orientation, and also unclearly dressed; 3) an Armenian doctor, almost without a neck, horribly similar to a quasi-mod; 4) a girl without sexual characteristics with obvious autism.

[ + 30 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №70496
 24.09.2012
Lenka was burned.
She taught Serena to give teas.
Has it happened?
- Well, how to say - he ran after the waiters in the restaurant with screams - wait, I haven't given you the teaspoons yet!

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №70495
 24.09.2012
From the discussion of a bill banning the use of “masking” (proxy) software.

Better to work so hard with corruption.
WU: They work very hard with her. Hand on hand.

[ + 35 - ] [4 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №70494
 24.09.2012
Turn on the TV.
On Earth, scientists have discovered craters similar to nuclear craters on the Moon, which means that ancient humanity was bombarded in response.
O_O
Shut off the TV.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna