bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 56 - ] Comment quote №107114
 21.12.2014
Hi to. I am a pathologist. I have the quietest clients and the best work with people. There are a lot of offended people on the pages of this site. The sellers complain about the buyers, the buyers about the sellers, the informals about the locals, the locals about the informals. I have to say that they are all right.
The fact is that the invaluable experience I gained in the course of work suggests that 80% of people at the level of intelligence do not even reach the infusion of shoes. Stupidity is the primary cause of death, surpassing old age, illness, accidents and even wars by a good ten percent. To make my conclusions clear, I will explain the calculation method. If you failed to handle driving on an icy road and crashed, it is a car accident. If you performed this number, pressing the ice 120 km/h on a summer tire, you are a victim of your own stupidity. If you are poisoned with poor quality products, it is a pity. If you eat outdated canned foods simply because it’s a pity to throw them away, you’re stupid. If you were killed by electricity, it was an accident. If you used to turn the TV on, you are a clinical fool whose brain was dead long before the official death. If you burned in the fire, I apologize. If the fire started from the fact that you were drunk smoking in bed, well, you understood me. Every day I take out the rooted steering wheels from the ended hands of the streets, I roll into the rolls of the fools who tried to write SMS, crossing the highway, I collect, like a puzzle, debils who lighted their spark in the gasoline tank, and I crush into the grave of the idiots who tried to spire the high-voltage cable. There is no end to this, which clearly testifies to the intellectual level of the population. Don’t offend others – fools are not offended. And don’t offend others yourself – it’s not easy to connect with fools. And if you suddenly decided that you belong to the rare 20% only on the basis that you are still hanging on the ground with your ears up, then just remember: it's not you so smart, it's just fools lucky. Good luck to all, good luck, and to see you soon.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №107113
 21.12.2014
In the 1990s, people in panic bought soap, salt and light bulbs, and now - TVs, cars and apartments.
What did Putin do to the country!!! to

[ + 57 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №107112
 21.12.2014
In Russia, people like to talk about how bad things are. And most tell so confidently how to arrange everything so that it becomes beautiful and wonderful around. And in a minute you drive with such a person in the car and on your question "Why are you breaking?" you get in response "Everyone does it". This thinking prevails in everything. They steal because everyone does. It didn’t help, because everything passed by. Why do you do "as everything"? Is it better to be a man? And let behind the signals "amateurs die behind the wheel". Let you alone wait for the green light before the pedestrian crossing, when the rest are already going to the red. Listen to your conscience and do not "do as everyone" does. Finding the guilty and envying them is a path to the abyss. And you can water me with dirt, blame me for anything, attribute anything, but maybe someone who has read this will realize that he is not alone.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №107111
 21.12.2014
And while you say that you haven’t found a house on NG, I’m sitting alone in trësk and dreaming of a good company. Better nowhere than with no one. All are good!

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №107110
 21.12.2014
Comments to the article on the high level of development of thinking in crows.

These crows in the government!
Sadly the crown. They lock them.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №107109
 21.12.2014
Or do you think that people who consider themselves Orthodox will actually go to someone’s private temple that does not belong to any confession? If you go, only for a trip.
_______
Most of those who consider themselves Orthodox even about the "Symbol of Faith" do not know anything, and you about such subtleties... They will go like cute, the main thing is to draw more convincingly.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №107108
 21.12.2014
Damn, man, you have seen her, and what she will post on the wall!
WOW: I have seen. It turned into TP almost entirely.
Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh I answered myself! Do you need it, fucking?
What a shit, we have to!

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №107107
 21.12.2014
In one and a half thousand years, the resolution (analogue) of the UN General Assembly will decide on the formation of the State of Ukraine on the part of the territory controlled by the Lviv and Volyn emirates.

"It is unclear why the Chinese will create or maintain some emirates and especially other states on their planet.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №107106
 21.12.2014
This will not be destruction but schizophrenia, try not to create a club with someone who will sing a choir with you.
===
It is not even schizophrenia, but in general, trying to argue with Professor Preobražensky.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №107105
 21.12.2014
Literacy and mental development. As a child, he considered himself very clever and calculated, not without grounds, but with over-the-counter. I liked to replace various words with synonyms to show that I know their meaning, apparently. She sent me, so my mom to the pharmacy to buy candles with beauty extract. So I understood that "with the extract" in this case should not be changed to "with the taste". The pharmacist was very pleased with this request.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №107104
 21.12.2014
Onfim: We are so aware that we are being listened to.
Onfim: But now security officials are complaining that we are talking too loud around fire sensors. Nuts are non-branded.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №107103
 21.12.2014
I like to cuddle. Sometimes I forget and can do it with a stranger.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №107102
 21.12.2014
My daughter (2,5 years old) just said in the store:
Dad, I love you very much!
I squeezed, everyone around smiled, and she continued without lowering the volume:
And the mandarins too.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №107101
 21.12.2014
H&M: I recently went to second grade.
xhh> They asked them to prepare for the exhibition.
xhh> He is sitting, zumbing. His knowledge is periodically checked.
hh> I hear it rush like sick.
xhh> Well I was interested, said, chazanah.
I go into my son’s room. He looks at her in the oak, and she cries. And in her hands she has a drawing with exhibition.
hh> Well I take it, I read it.
The essence of the text is that in the spring the mouse nurses flooded, the mice flooded, and the birds began to throw stones on them from the clove to get a blow.
Well, and the heroes of the text, say, caught the yoghurt out of the water, planted him and he was still sitting in the boat.
After the birds, which (I quote) "throwed mice with stones along the sloping trajectory", I still stood.
xhh> But after "on the bottom of the boat I was sitting on an affectionate yogi" I bended with my wife %)
xhh> And the son has never understood what the ancestors are...
H&M and I love kids. % of

[ + 21 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №107100
 21.12.2014
If you ask the technician, he will say that there are no three-digit numbers.

[ + 22 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №107099
 20.12.2014
How does a product of exclusively animal origin fall into vegetable oil, can it be clarified?

– – – –
Miss, did you want to clarify before you decided to let anyone go? Or our plants have ceased to be living organisms, which essentially contain this fat in their fragile cells, excluding only unfortunate prokaryotes, endowed with such a wonderful opportunity.
and...
Dear Sir, you would at least open a school textbook on biology and by familiar letters try to learn that living organisms are divided into the kingdom of animals and the kingdom of plants. And the oil cultures of the plant kingdom cannot contain the fat of the meat and milk of the animal kingdom. They do not cross, at all. A cat with raps and sunflower instead of wool and high-hearted flowers for you! ))

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №107098
 20.12.2014
This is:

Well, and what kind of profitable production is concentrated in Norway, Sweden and Canada, are you highly spiritual?

— — —

In Canada there is, say, Bombardier (like a very large manufacturer of trams, trains, locomotives, aircraft and other little things like quad-cycles).

In Sweden, for example, there is the furniture giant Ikea.

Norwegians do not have any crazy developments, but they did not steal their petrodollars, but allowed to improve living standards and created a significant reserve fund, which allows them to now relatively calmly experience the fall in the price of oil.

In the end, let me wonder: how long have you been gambled in Google? How is it in Baneto?

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №107097
 20.12.2014
Green is the color of Avada Kedavra, the dollar is also green.
— — — —
The color of light, the color of life, the color of Islam, and the color of Esperanto. Fuck, I just had a conspiracy theory!

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №107096
 20.12.2014
Judging by the fact that in the cartoon about Cheburashka the crocodile walks in a hat and coat, knows how to write and talk, he is genetically modified.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №107095
 20.12.2014
DerArto: Santa, I don’t know what it’s like to sleep out, I’ve never had it, but others say it’s cool, give it a gift for the New Year, right?

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