bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 51 - ] Comment quote №36138
 16.09.2010
<pingvin> People, who will advise to account for traffic lock?
<levsha> unlimited

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №36137
 16.09.2010
<[GNZ]Oodin> [sky]Maña: After shaking in the silence and tranquility of sex you want in 10 minutes, after normal sex - you can experience the rise and euphoria for another week or two

<[Sky]Enlarge_you_pencil> [GNZ]Oodin: in the army the rise can be experienced a year!

[ + 69 - ] Comment quote №36136
 16.09.2010
tanicist
Hi to

metahom2
Hi to

tanicist
What do you

metahom2
He gathered questions for you. I mean, I am ? ? ? ?? to

metahom2
When it’s over, I’ll collect.

tanicist
They why me.

metahom2
The Wall *

[ + 65 - ] Comment quote №36135
 16.09.2010
by Marisa (19:10)
Are you in Khabarovsk?

by Tim (19:10)
I am in Vladivostok.

by Marika (19:11) :
Is this city nearby?
How many minutes to drive?

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №36134
 16.09.2010
In Novosibirsk, the head of the anti-corruption commission was detained for receiving a bribe of 300,000 rubles. You say there is no justice in the world ;)

[ + 61 - ] Comment quote №36133
 16.09.2010
Ten years of professional opera vocals and rehearsals of soloists in a heavy metal group are nothing compared to two lectures read in the first course... I broke my voice after these lectures ((((

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №36132
 16.09.2010
xxx: I know the story of a four-metre soma...who lived somewhere on the Volga! He swallowed a little girl...and then her mother! The girl’s father then caught him and scattered him. Inside were his wife and daughter.

Yyy:...and two dozen ships
Then they all went out and lived long and happy.

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №36131
 16.09.2010
English for five!and p :
2Ivanhoe - Cho for a stupid nick - Ivan Hoi, Punk Choli?
Ivanhoe is:
You, as I look at it, "English"-just like metal handed - on weight?

[ + 70 - ] Comment quote №36130
 16.09.2010
Well there you build a town... stores, banks... houses, cafes... people sleep...
Then the ball was tired. Remove it from the appendix. How are they there...?
It is a well-known case. God, see, has been removed from our application

[ + 71 - ] Comment quote №36129
 16.09.2010
(Talk about a newly bought friend of a sea pig)
Is she already accustomed to drinking?

She doesn’t need a naphid! I read here that they get all the necessary fluid from food. So they don’t drink water at all!

Do you know the sea pig?

[ + 49 - ] Comment quote №36128
 16.09.2010
XXX: Unknown
xxx: out of the direction I was seriously interested in where the desk is stored - in monitors or in that black box.

[ + 62 - ] Comment quote №36127
 16.09.2010
Alyosha (21:27:23 15/09/2010)
Specialists from the Massachusetts University of Technology developed a rather original shirt, which received the name Sp4rkl3. It should be liked by many girls. The fact is that this shirt shines in different colors while walking. Interestingly, the higher the speed of walking, the brighter the shirt will shine. Naturally, it did not go without high technology, which helped to realize the idea of the creators.

Alyosha (21:28:29 15/09/2010)
They would have made clothes with a sirene.

Alyosha (21:28:36 15/09/2010)
Not having sex for a long time

Alyosha (21:28:39 15/09/2010)
I want to pull

Alyosha (21:28:44 15/09/2010)
Here it voices.

[ + 78 - ] Comment quote №36126
 16.09.2010
XXX: I was transferred to a new position. Now I have access to a bunch of new P-3 and P-2 seats and premises in our organization. Not all bosses even have such privileges!
YYY: Congratulations to you!
XXX: The SP
YYY: And now tell your story to your cleaners, grandparents, and grandparents, let them crack.
XXX is fucking! Everything is broken =(

[ + 65 - ] Comment quote №36125
 16.09.2010
HHH
I have a cat.

HHH
Stretching is able

HHH
The current that pulled the club... stuck behind the chair... surrounded him.

HHH
Stabbed on a chair in the room.

HHH
He came back and looked at me... mol take the job...


[ + 58 - ] Comment quote №36124
 16.09.2010
Today in the repair was a computer with a modem brand Pentagram.
So I see this advertisement: "Modems "Pentagram" - the Internet at Aztec speeds!"

[ + 63 - ] Comment quote №36123
 16.09.2010
"Rostechnology": "We have released a new phone. There will be two screens.
B: Would you be interested in connecting with the VAZWORK?? to
c: Is the GLONASS backpack and batteries included?
"Rostechnology":Seven Sims..In-built shocker and electric shaver..Secret socket for your credit card..And rubber..Special pocket heating mode...

[ + 70 - ] Comment quote №36122
 16.09.2010
x: As explained by the head of the department for urban development Nikolai Zlobin, the electricity consumption of LED lamps is 25 times the life of a conventional lamp.
A cow weighs 250 times the life span of a duck.
X is dumb )))

[ + 41 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №36121
 16.09.2010
For men to have only one thing in mind, a woman, oh how you need to work hard: to obscure football, beer, cars, etc. of other women.

[ + 121 - ] Comment quote №36120
 16.09.2010
Unpleasant history in general.

A few years ago, a rehabilitation program for drug addicts was developed in our city. The essence of her briefly consisted in treatment with subsequent employment. Young people who were caught with a small amount of drugs were offered a choice: either a criminal case or treatment under this program and work for several years. Thus, in the dining room of our company came Lecha.

Leish was placed on the most harmless thing - to make salads. Leia tried very hard. And we started periodically eating very funny salads. How about, for example, winegret with crab sticks? Or a mimosis with a green peanut?
The management tolerated these twists until the time, but somewhere a month later, Lecha noticed such a masterpiece that he came to see the doctors of the rehabilitation center on the wreck accompanied by the police. The body was dropped down, took a blood test and released back after an hour. There was nothing in his blood.

In the evening before the end of the working day, I went to the toilet to “refresh” and heard a quiet whisper in the neighboring cabin. I persuaded Lesha to go out and we three with my friend accompanied him home.

The story of Lehi was simple: a boy from a good family. After high school, he went to cooking and wanted to become a cook. But he got into a bad company and tried herb first, and then heroin. When he was caught, he was already seated. To the Rehabilitation Center asked himself, there he was transplanted from heroin to pills, rid of addiction, but broke the roof. According to the idea, he needed to recover in the center for at least six months and would be a normal person. But here was the end of the year, the region needed good statistics and everyone who at least somehow got rid of the dependence was quickly discharged and distributed by the city's budget enterprises.
Lesser remembered the cooking equipment and sent to the dining room. 99% of those throwed out in this way within a month collapsed and returned to the Center to make statistics for the following year. Leshai also came to pick up, but the difference was that he did not just want to avoid conviction, he really wanted to give up. He didn’t even drink beer after leaving.

In general, we ended our conversation with his parents for a cup of tea.
The next day, we gathered the initiative group and went to the dining room with a request to leave Lesha. Eventually, he was transferred from chefs to auxiliary workers for a while. By the time I left, Lecha was making salads again under the supervision of the cook.

Actually, I would hardly have remembered this story almost a decade ago, if it had not been a recent case. My wife and I went to dinner at the cafe.
I ordered and pulled a beer. Here they bring me something. A steak dried up on top with shrimp, green peas, tomatoes, fry onions and even the hell knows what. I misunderstood the waitress. She obviously makes me laugh. And here the body comes out. In a cooking cap and with a smile across the face. On the bench was a normal steak and a bottle of wine. Unfortunately, we couldn’t talk especially, Lecha was the chief chef there and couldn’t get away, but I never ate a more delicious steak in my life. Maybe simply because of the taste of joy for a person who did not break and fulfilled his dream.

[ + 52 - ] Comment quote №36119
 16.09.2010
The boss teaches the smaller boss:
You cannot give an employee more work than he can do. I know,
Whatever he does, he will do nothing at all.

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